How do I process this? (warning-explicit)
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Topic: How do I process this? (warning-explicit)
Posted By: Maya
Subject: How do I process this? (warning-explicit)
Date Posted: 09 June 2007 at 10:37pm
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Tonight I went to Countdown with my friend and her twins to get some baby food (and before my anti-consumer buddies start shouting it was for her!).
Anyway, I left the gremlins and Maya in their trolley with my friend and her girls by the baby food and dashed across a few aisles to get some rice crackers. I came back, came in the other end of the aisle and there was a man lying on the floor with blood pouring out of his head (and I'm not exaggerating, it was literally gushing). Before I could even register what was happening one of the Countdown staff ran past and threw a phone to me and said "here, talk to the ambulance". So I talked to the ambulance call centre and passed on instructions to a few other people who were helping, we put a packet of nappies under his head and the trolley boy was holding some paper towels over the mans head which was totally ineffective till someone appeared with some towels off the shelf still in their packaging and opened them and they held it on his head. I'm not sure whether he slipped and hit his head on the freezer as he fell, or if he had a stroke/heart attack coz he was quite elderly, but he was unconscious and a customer who was a nurse took his pulse. Then I had to go out to meet the ambulance and I asked the checkout superviser to make a space for the ambulance people to get thru with the stretcher, the store was so busy the checkout staff had no idea what was going on. Then the ambulance people basically told us all to sod off and they got him on the stretcher and out of there real quick with the sirens going etc. There would have been I'd say close to half a litre of blood on the floor. So we came home, and my friend went home and now I'm feeling a wee bit shell shocked. The wound on his head was like someone had bashed him over the head, when I first saw it I thought he was dead. The whole time Maya was just sitting there watching, afterwards she asked me if the man had died and I explained that he was fine and the ambulance was taking him to hospital so the doctors can fix his head, and she seemed OK with that, but how traumatic is this for her? Should I be worried? I left my name and # with the staff at Countdown (they know me and the girls anyway) and they're going to call and let me know if they hear how he's doing. Mum suggested I ring the hospital, but I'm not sure I really want to know. I mean, what if he dies? Sorry for the ramble, I just really needed to get this out. Feeling rather wired, this is soooo not good for my already-anxious, highly strung self!  -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Replies:
Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: 09 June 2007 at 10:45pm
I wouldn't be too worried just yet about how Maya is processing it unless she starts to get really upset all of a sudden, or becomes obsessed with death in general or things like you hitting your head and having to go to hospital etc.
 More huge hugs to you though, I know that these kinds of experiences can have a huge impact on you if you're not used to dealing with them (ie: job-wise) and I think despite how scary it was you got through it amazingly well.
Before I got into my airport job and went through training for these kinds of things, I was really blown out of the water by an incident at my library job - they were having a social function upstairs and an elderly lady collapsed on the toilet. I went up to the staff room (adjacent) on my break, and found all these people running around and yelling to find someone who had first aid training. Sucker me said I did, and had to keep up CPR until the ambos got there. She didn't make it sadly, and my boss made me go home - took me a while to spring back from that. Anyway, if you don't feel comfortable ringing the hospital you don't have to - it doesn't make you a bad person or anything, like I said I think you handled things really well (even if you aren't feeling like you did). You know where I am if you need to talk as well, so don't think twice about txting or ringing me ok?? |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 09 June 2007 at 10:53pm
Wow, what a big thing to have on your mind tonight! Probably it will hit the papers sometime soon, just because it was a public place, so you'll know eventually. It sounds like you've done really well with Maya, little kids are great at this stuff and you'll probably find she has no problems with it because she knows the man is "getting his head fixed". Hopefully you're a words processor and now that you've put this out in cyberspace you're feeling a bit better. Now, go grab some chocolate  ------------- |
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 09 June 2007 at 10:58pm
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in all likelihood emma the blood may not have been that serious...i mean sometimes a lot of blood doesnt always mean bad things, like when the kids fingers get cut when trimming their nails, or when they play with razors and slice their fingers open (thats toby)...
maya will probably be better than you, have a bath and a chamomile drink and go to bed... 
oh and i bet you feel better just for typing it all out too... and you should feel good that you got to help and werent just some gawker... ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: Mazzy
Date Posted: 09 June 2007 at 11:05pm
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Oh man, I hope you feel better for writing it all out, what an unexpected and scary thing to have happen. You sound like you handled things really well, stayed calm and helped the ambulance, not everyone can do that.
I remember a few years ago I was in Taupo and saw an older guy on the sidewalk take a fall. He just lost conciousness and fell heavily onto the footpath and cracked his head - it sounds very similar to what you experienced. We stopped and helped, ambulance arrived and took him off...he was ok and released a few days later I heard. I hope the same result happens here. Head wounds bleed really, really heavily, so sometimes look very bad but can be a treatable cut. The underlying cause of the fall is out of your control and hopefully something they can also manage and help him with. He is lucky the fall happened in such a public place and not when he was alone. Not much more to say except and well done for how you have dealt with it all and with Maya, you're a 
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Posted By: SquishysMum
Date Posted: 10 June 2007 at 9:35am
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How are you today, Emma? I hope a good nights sleep has taken away some of the shakes.
Maya will probably be ok, kids are quite resilient when it comes to things like this, and you sound like you handles it well with her.
It is tough for you, though, and it will probably be front in your mind for a while, and be something you never forget. When I was younger and working in a rest home, one of "my" old ladies had a stroke in the toilet - I walked in an found her. She sadly passed away a few days later. It doesn't go away, but does fade eventually. You were a legend talking to the St Johns operator, they always like having someone calm and collected on the end of the phone (which I'm sure you were). I know the ambo's seemed a bit abrupt, but they were just doing their job. Doesn't help any to be left standing around though, does it? Anyway, I really hope things are a little better today. More , and take it easy.
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Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 10 June 2007 at 10:33am
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Maya will be so impressed with her mummy helping out the old man. A very positive image for her! But thats life and she will probably deal with it easier than we do asshe doesnt really know too many details.
hope you are feeling better after a nights sleep...you did sleep I hope? |
Posted By: BaAsKa
Date Posted: 10 June 2007 at 10:49am
I wondered the same thing about Bailey when he watched his father cut his hand to bits!!!  he totally understood more than i thought and seems to be fine now! he just seems to be a little overprotective of his dadda now.
Im sure Maya will be fine but i hope you feel better soon Emma that sounded like a terrible thing to deal with
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Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 10 June 2007 at 11:00am
 Huge hugs Ems. I just cant imagine the horror of coming upon a scene like that.. Big up to girl for helping out and what a fantastic job you did dealing with Maya. Like everyelse has said, kids are really resilient. It would all be pretty simple for her "man hit his head and was bleeding and ambulance came and took him to hosp to get fixed". Great that you are aware tho if she did exibit any signs of worrying over the situation as some kids are more sensitive and prone to take on more than their fair share of empathy.I hope your feeling much better today!! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: Spudling
Date Posted: 10 June 2007 at 11:04am
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Firstly well done you Emma! Sounds like you stayed calm and did what had to be done.
I have no idea how tramatic it would be for Maya, but at a guess I would imagine that it would be 100 times more for you, so maybe worry about No1 for a change ...not an easy task for a Mum I know. Hope you are feeling better today hon ------------- http://tickers.families.com"> 
http://tickers.families.com"> 
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Posted By: caraMel
Date Posted: 10 June 2007 at 12:03pm
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Hey there Emma.
I hope you're feeling better today. I would have found it very upsetting too, and you did really well keeping it together and explaining it to Maya the way you did! Huge to you.------------- Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and: 
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Posted By: pepsi
Date Posted: 10 June 2007 at 3:46pm
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Hell, that is pretty scary! It must have felt like a bit of a dream while it was all happening...definitely not your everyday shopping experience.
I hope you're ok and that you hear back that the old man is recovering well.. |
Posted By: Andie
Date Posted: 10 June 2007 at 3:52pm
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Chances are Maya will remember the day she saw her mum being a bit of a hero... so unless she develops new fears, there should be nothing to worry about. The man might like to see the people who helped him that day, so if it's really playing on your mind, would it be so weird to ring the hospital and visit him? If he's OK it could be good for Maya to see him in a better state, too. I performed CPR on a workmate who sadly died at the time, so I know that a trauma like that does impact you and you've just gotta talk about it at some point. And the Countdown episode sounds like a scary time, so good on ya for hopping on here and getting it out. Are you still shaken up though? You're not a wuss if you are!! ------------- Andie |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 10 June 2007 at 4:24pm
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Gosh Emma I just saw someone have an epilictic (sp?) fit for the first time today and that freaked me out! ------------- |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 10 June 2007 at 4:44pm
Thanks for all your kind thoughts 
I'm okay today, nothing like the cold light of day to give you a bit of clarity huh? But I did get a bit spooked when I was talking to a friend this morning and she said "what a horrible way to die" and I kind of wish she hadn't - I'd like to think he's ok! Not brave enough to ring and ask tho, might just check when I go in to Countdown next to see if they've heard anything. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 10 June 2007 at 4:46pm
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PS. Am really, really grouchy with Maya, she woke me up four times last night, and it didn't seem to be related to what had happened, she just wanted to get into bed with us. And it is SO too cold to be up fussing with her in the middle of the night. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: Bombshell
Date Posted: 10 June 2007 at 8:42pm
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I rang and left message for the girls mother after i saw the girl get hit by a car a few weeks back...and never any response...and i explained on message who i was etc too....guess I wont know....
Emma forgot to tell u that somethings stay with us...but maybe not how u think...for years i had a recurring dream about carrying an arm thorugh corridors...I was a child or an adult dependdng on when i dreamt it. I didnt tell anyone til years later and mum laughed at me....turns out while nursing she took me on occcasion while she was studying etc and i demanded to carry a parcel she had one day, through the corridors of greenlane tunnels....and yes it was an arm in a bag...she hadnt thought i had realised what it was and had given it to me cause i was throwing a paddy!!!......obviously affected me at a very very deep level somehow... once i told her i never had the dream ever again! seriously!!! Maya may have similar in time....who knows.... |
Posted By: james
Date Posted: 11 June 2007 at 8:26am
emma you handled it very well i have been in many a death (i use to be a caregiver) and i think you handed relly well about 3 years ago while at pns christmas eve a edldy lady fell and knocked her head (she triped backwards over a bread bin on the floor  )the store manger was goning to send this poor old lady home  now she was very conxussed and didnt evern no were she live it took me and my mum a half hour to talk the manger into getting a amberlince and we wanted to ring but hospital will only give information to familiy so there was no point relly big hugs hunny hope the day is brighter for you too day ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: daikini
Date Posted: 11 June 2007 at 8:43am
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Wow Emma! What a scary thing to happen in front of you all. I think you handled it very well... and like the others said, unless Maya starts to ask questions or develops strange fears that seem to be linked to what she saw then don't worry! ------------- Becca, mum of 2 girls & 3 boys |
Posted By: Anna
Date Posted: 11 June 2007 at 8:57am
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Emma, that is scary stuff. I hope you and miss maya are doing ok! ------------- Anna http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Rackhell
Date Posted: 11 June 2007 at 12:33pm
| Have you heard anything from the countdown people? |
Posted By: nuttymama
Date Posted: 11 June 2007 at 1:35pm
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Emma, that sucks, I hope you are feeling a bit better today.
As far as Maya goes if she asks maybe a little white lie is called for. When the boys saw some guy collapse and get rushed away in an ambulance (heart attack) After school they asked me if he was dead and as bad as it might sound I lied to them and said he was going to be fine and was going home! I just didn't see the sense in upsetting them. I still wonder how he is, so I can understand you needing to know. Big hugs.
------------- Abigail 06/01/2005 Jayden 21/11/2001 Micheal 03/04/1997 |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 11 June 2007 at 3:11pm
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Nope, haven't heard from them, but have to go in there this afternoon sometime anyway so will ask if they've heard anything.
Vick - I told Maya a bit of a white lie too, I told her he was fine and the doctors were going to put a bandage on his head. I hope that is what happened! I guess sometimes it's okay to lie, if it makes someone else feel better about a bad situation. She hasn't mentioned it since, and slept thru last night ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: nuttymama
Date Posted: 12 June 2007 at 7:03am
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Glad to hear she slept through. White lies are not so bad when your protecting your child. Not to mention the little lies we tell about Santa, easter bunny, tooth fairy etc. .
Did you find out how he was. You must be one cool mama I probably would have frozen or passed out with that much blood .
So Maya's ok how's mum doing? ------------- Abigail 06/01/2005 Jayden 21/11/2001 Micheal 03/04/1997 |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 12 June 2007 at 8:46pm
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woah emma. I would've just sat there dumbfounded if it had of been me in that situation, so good on you with the calm manner you reacted with. hope the poor guy was okay.
I was in class with someone who was texted about that guy who had the crane collapse on his head in manners Mall in wellington. her bf was there and text her immediately afterwards. appaerntly he was quite traumatised for a while. |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 18 February 2008 at 7:47pm
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Would you believe it happened again?! I must be a magnet for old people falling over! This time we were at Lynnmall and I had just gotten the kids back in the car to go home when I saw a lady in the space opposite us lying on the ground and another lady with her yelling out ring an ambulance. Another lady was trying to ring an ambulance but her phone went flat so I had to do it then wait for the ambulance to come. Meanwhile the kids were in the car eating plain hot dog buns coz that was all I had on hand to keep them quiet.
The lady was conscious by the time the ambulance arrived, apparently she tripped over one of those concrete barrier thingies that stop you driving too far forward into the parking space. The ambulance guys got her standing up but coz her head was bleeding and coz of her age (she would have been late 70's early 80's) they wanted her to go to hospital. We left at this stage coz they didn't need me anymore and the kids were going nuts but I'm sure she'll be OK, she was nowhere near as bad as the poor man in the supermarket. BTW we never did find out how the supermarket guy got on. And the first thing Maya said tonight when she realised what was happening was "just like in the supermarket eh mum?" ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: Kellz
Date Posted: 18 February 2008 at 7:50pm
| OMG! I started reading and wondered why your old thread had been bumped! Glad the women was ok, and lucky u had at least som,e food to keep the gremlins quiet! |
Posted By: meow
Date Posted: 18 February 2008 at 8:03pm
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You're a good samaritan Emma
Pay it forward kinda thing. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Bombshell
Date Posted: 18 February 2008 at 8:10pm
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yeah i was wondering too...i had visions of maya having had a nightmare over it or something...
you are just a good samaritan tho Em....eg broken into cars in dressmart!!!!
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Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 18 February 2008 at 8:10pm
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Im with you kelly I started reading thinking you were updating us on the old man. Aww poor lady I hope she is ok. I FREAK OUT when I see things like that!! Good on you Emma for being a great samaritain (sp?) ------------- http://lilypie.com">
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 18 February 2008 at 8:15pm
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Yup, I'm just a sucker for a bleeding heart story ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 18 February 2008 at 8:21pm
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I was wondering why it had been bumped up (and at first I thought Willie had done something as well with the tital of the post). You have some sort of magnet don't you. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: AnnC
Date Posted: 18 February 2008 at 8:35pm
Freak out?? but kels your a nurse
Emma good on you for helping out - i guess you just can't walk away - I can't either. Big hug - well done hun ------------- Ann 
Also Mum to Josh (15) and Brooke (10) |
Kels wrote:Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 18 February 2008 at 8:35pm
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ANd you have a big heart!!! I get far to freaked out in these situations to be of help and to shy to offer assistance and say I have some medical background etc....
------------- http://lilypie.com">
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: Bubbaloo
Date Posted: 18 February 2008 at 8:45pm
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Oh no good to hear she should be alright.
I also thought you were going to update u on the old man. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  Was danni-chick Mum to James My Angel 28/07/08 |
Posted By: nictoddie
Date Posted: 18 February 2008 at 9:13pm
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I always ended up with the accidents when I was a retail manager too, hate the sight of blood but something just seems to kick in very strange, hope she is ok ------------- 
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Posted By: Paws
Date Posted: 18 February 2008 at 9:40pm
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Hehehehe don't Emma I sometimes feel like a magnet too and you know me...I HAVE to jump in and help boots and all. It's good that you do, so many people wouldn't.
Hope the lady is ok! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: caraMel
Date Posted: 18 February 2008 at 10:31pm
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Poor lady! I trip over those barriers all the time, they must be a real hazard for people with limited ability like the elderly.
Good on you Emma for helping out, her family and friends will be so grateful that there was someone kind and caring there with her to help out. ------------- Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and:
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