My poor DH...
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
Forum Description: For mums, dads, parents-to-be, grandparents, friends -- you name it! And you name the topic you want to chat about!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=8759
Printed Date: 10 October 2025 at 11:49am
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Topic: My poor DH...
Posted By: emz
Subject: My poor DH...
Date Posted: 03 July 2007 at 12:44pm
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has been having so much trouble at work. First of all, he's starting to come to terms with not being around for the birth and the first few months of bubs life, and then his bosses wanted to put him on an in-work course for 2 months which means he would miss scans/appts etc. He's already missed all but 1 (I've been having more than normal as going through a spec).
Normally it would have been fine but he begins training for Timor straight after and can't be excused to go to anything baby related then either. So he had to have a big meeting with the 'big cheese' who went nuts at him (this course is to hurry along a promotion). Now they've taken him off the course (yay!) but... They've also given him 2 options. Either he: a) moves to another area of the army and takes a demotion, as well as losing all of the progress he's made with the current guys, but doesn't go to Timor and therefore gets to bond with his baby (although he would go again in May-Dec next year). OR b) stay where you are, don't get the promotion until you get back from Timor (june next year). Keep making progress, go to Timor and get quite a lot of $$ for your efforts. Now, I probably sound money-hungry but there's no way I want him to choose (a) just because he'll miss the birth etc. Heaps of guys do it all the time (including a lot of our friends). And we've pretty much already spent that money 
He's got until next week to decide. Decisions, decisions! And if your still reading, thanks 
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Replies:
Posted By: nictoddie
Date Posted: 03 July 2007 at 1:19pm
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Wow that is a big one, while I don't have a partner in the milatry my brother is in the airforce he got out at the end of last year and has decided he misses it too much and is going back in next month, he has two sons and although he was in the country for both births he has missed many milestones and birthdays due to being overseas. Huge decisions and I'm sure you will make the right one for your family. ------------- 
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 03 July 2007 at 1:38pm
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My DF is in the Airforce and while they make every effort to have him home for milestones, births etc.
I certainly wouldn't want him to jeapordise his career for it. Sadly with the military, and I think more so with the Army the service comes before family. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 03 July 2007 at 1:46pm
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sounds like you've made up your mind...if he agrees then it sounds like a done deal. ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 03 July 2007 at 3:15pm
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Wow it's so tough when you have decisions like that, it feels like the weight of the world falls on your shoulders! Keep talking together and I hope you reach a confident decision soon. -------------  |
Posted By: sally belly
Date Posted: 03 July 2007 at 4:17pm
Wow Emma  what a decision you & DH have to make. You sound like you've both been "preparing" for the fact that he won't be around for the birth so maybe looking to the long-term might be the best option. I know you have your families & friends around so you won't be completely on your own. It's still a tough decision though & I really feel for you but you sound strong...
Maybe he should join the navy  It's no where near as bad by the sounds of it. Although I guess it would be if DH was currently posted to a ship.
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Posted By: emz
Date Posted: 03 July 2007 at 8:47pm
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Thanks for your thoughts ladies... hehe Sal, I think I've fallen for the frog suit so he'll have to stay put! Although his suit leaves little to be desired... do the navy have nicer ones?!
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Posted By: sally belly
Date Posted: 04 July 2007 at 9:40am
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I'm not sure if they're "nicer" as such but DH always looks nice when he's all dressed up in one of his flash uniforms The black winter uniform is definitely better than the summer one - I'm not too keen on white shorts and socks myself -------------
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