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Bellaz
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Posted: 06 April 2014 at 5:00pm |
I am from the Manawatu and am to start trying soon for Baby Number 1! I just bought a onesie that says 'Baby xxxxx' ... going to use it to announce pregnancy to DH and possibly family. Cute!
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binklemouse
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Posted: 06 April 2014 at 9:39pm |
MrsBaker, how are you? x
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DJKaf
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Posted: 07 April 2014 at 7:24am |
We aren't going on honeymoon bellaz. We have FH's parents here from Tunisia and so we both took the time off work to hang out with them. So we have another week off after our wedding then we are back to work :( But maybe we will go later in the year somewhere. I like the idea of hawaii, but it will depend on babes. I was saying the other day we will either go on honeymoon or have a baby, whatever comes first. Got a few laughs but its quite true, if we get pregnant I wont want to fly.
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enelra
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Posted: 07 April 2014 at 12:38pm |
Hi all Just checking back in here to see how you're all doing :) DJKaf all the best for your wedding. I love weddings!! My sister is getting married in November so we went wedding dress shopping in the weekend. Such fun! I've been married for nearly 7 years so feels like a distant memory now haha
I've been hanging out in the 2WW, though I'm not actually in the 2WW yet, that seems to be the place to be when you're trying. I should ov today or tomorrow then the waiting around to see if it worked!
Looks like a few of you will be joining me in the 2WW thread soon!
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binklemouse
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Posted: 07 April 2014 at 8:44pm |
Does anyone else find it hard to talk about baby making with their DH? I know mine is reluctant and I know he finds the idea terrifying, but I feel like I should be able to talk to him about it without him automatically feeling harrassed. Maybe I need to pick my moments better....
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Bellaz
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Posted: 08 April 2014 at 7:56am |
Oh my gosh, Binklemouse, you have hit the nail on the head! I feel like that so much at the moment. In a weak moment DH even admitted that it is inevitable that we will have one soon and that he wants one. We have been talking about it most evenings, but it feels like I am more into the idea than him. Once he did say that he doesn't want to say yes until the exact moment he wants to start trying, as he thinks I will turn into a loopy baby lady (news flash.... I already have)! I often feel bad after bringing the topic up and for going on about it but at the same time I feel that persistence will pay off. What do you guys think?
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Dot2012
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Posted: 08 April 2014 at 9:01am |
binklemouse wrote:
Does anyone else find it hard to talk about baby making with their DH? I know mine is reluctant and I know he finds the idea terrifying, but I feel like I should be able to talk to him about it without him automatically feeling harrassed. Maybe I need to pick my moments better.... | Binklemouse I found it really hard with our first baby - so basically I just didn't talk about it. It was hard enough for him to have unprotected sex, let alone actually discuss that it might result in a baby! They DO want it, but for my DH it was more the fear of being the sole provider - the male responsibility of caring for a family - not fear of having a baby, as we knew we both wanted kiddies (I would never have married him without having THAT discussion!). I think the only discussion we had about it was one night when DH said "what are we doing?" and I said "we're just seeing what happens" and he accepted that. I never spoke about ovulation, my cycle, never got upset (in front of him) when I got AF, never let him know if I was testing, basically just acted very cool and calm about the whole thing! I came on here for emotional support as I didn't want anyone to know we were trying (aside from my sister). He was thrilled when I got my BFP and he was amazing and supportive during the pregnancy, but don't expect them to 'fall in love' until baby is born. It was much easier to discuss second time around as he knew what he was in for and we both knew we wanted a baby sometime this year (maybe not this soon but we're happy about it now). Well that was my experience anyway :)
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Bstargirl
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Posted: 08 April 2014 at 10:00am |
The maternal instinct is so hard to ignore right! I had it for a while before DD1, Lots of tears from me. And now, its back! The whole ooooooo baby baby feeling. I so hope for each of you on here, it happens when you want! (sorry I havnt read to far back, 700+ pages, eep! Hehe). I am a teacher too, or at least I was before bubs, and still think whete dd 2013 go! Lol. My students threw me a surprise baby shower and I was blown away, something I will rem forever! I miss them even now (just a little). I am doing a half marathon next month, something I never thought Id do! And jst really want to give it a go, then, hopefully babymaking not long after!
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binklemouse
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Posted: 08 April 2014 at 11:11am |
I am trying to be the same Dot. I have kept most of my pining, studying fertility/ovulation etc pretty much to myself and have been very grateful for the forum!! He has occasionally shown interest in my cycle (only lately) and I have explained it to him. He said 'we didn't have sex ed at school!!' (Catholic boys school hehe), so he did seem to want to know. Now he does know it's hard for me to do the whole 'let's just see what's happening thing...'
We have talked about starting this April but now it's here I am feeling quite emotional and worried that he's going to back out on me. I am trying to think of a way to discuss it with him WITHOUT crying and without him feeling cornered because I know that does no good. :/
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enelra
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Posted: 08 April 2014 at 12:45pm |
Binklemouse that does sound hard xx With number 1 it was DH that was putting the pressure on. We were married for 4 years before I felt ready as wanted to get my career established first. Every few months he would ask if I was ready for a baby. This time round though I feel like he's backed off too much. He says he wants more but I think cos we already have DD he doesn't feel the cluckiness lol Could you maybe say you really need to have a talk so you know where he's at? It might just be the money thing, and if that's the case having a plan in place might be just the push in the baby making direction he needs
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binklemouse
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Posted: 09 April 2014 at 11:02am |
So! I was brave last night and thought about my approach. I decided my point of view would be that he said we could in April so of course we will in April. We went out for dinner and I said ‘oh, I’m so excited that it’s April, are you excited?’ (knowing he isn’t haha….) He said ‘is that a trick question?’ He knew what I was talking about and said he was worried about not having a job. I told him he would by then and that delaying a few months would make no difference to us financially because I wouldn’t go back to school for a Feb, March or maybe even April baby, and that waiting would also mean our baby would be younger when she/he went to daycare. He counted on his fingers, nodded a little then said he wants me to still have fun on our holiday (ie. Not be pregnant, drink lots of cocktails), which showed me he didn’t really understand the ‘cycle’ discussion because there is no way I can get pregnant before our holiday. So YAY. I feel much better and was glad I didn’t build it all up and have a big blub in front of him (which I am prone to do…).
Excuse the novel!
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Bellaz
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Posted: 09 April 2014 at 5:24pm |
Good on you for talking to him about it! It must be nice knowing you are both on the same page now. Did he say yes to starting to try after your holiday?? I have talked about it a lot with DH and have now decided to just drop the subject.... Except for once each month when I will ask if I should go back on the pill after my period. Fingers crossed he says yes to staying off it soon. He knows it is really important to me and we both want a big family (we talked about that lots before getting married)!!
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binklemouse
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Posted: 09 April 2014 at 5:39pm |
Well my fertile days are at the end of our holiday! So he's not getting away with contraception there. I will 'enjoy' my holiday a lot more knowing I am trying to make a baby than I will drinking cocktails hehe. I found going off the pill was a good baby step towards making babies. I explained to DH that it was something I wanted to do in preparation for eventually making a baby. It also made him in charge of contraception again which was a nice change. I have been off the pill since September. I also announced when I was starting elevit which was another gentle prompt. tehe. Funny the ways we have to 'handle' things.
Edited by binklemouse - 09 April 2014 at 5:42pm
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Bellaz
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Posted: 09 April 2014 at 5:47pm |
Haha so true. I have tried talking to him about going off the pill. I don't overly like taking it and it would be a step in the right direction. He just can't be bothered being in charge of the contraception himself! I think I might just pull the 'it's my body' card and go off it....it is good to let your body go back to its natural cycle before trying, apparently. I have also asked him about taking folic acid but he wasn't overly keen, although he knows I will have to start it one day soon. Exciting that next month could be it for you!
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binklemouse
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Posted: 10 April 2014 at 2:57pm |
Yes that's how I put it Bellaz. I said I wanted to go off the pill to prepare and explained it was nothing to do with wanting to have a baby right then. I didn't really give him much of a say in the matter. He did a little theatrical whinge about having to use condoms haha, but it's been fine since then.
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DJKaf
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Posted: 11 April 2014 at 8:03am |
Goodness lots been happening in here. Well I find with my FH/DH in 1 day!!!!! that he seems to think (this is the latest in a line of thinks) that I will struggle having a baby because theres lots of things I don't like doing even though I should do them. GRRRRRRR he was talking about not going to mum and dads to check if mum is hemming dads suit trousers at the right length. We were on our way to a wedding, I wasn't about to stop and check a pair of pants. Anyway it pisses me off so much that he says that. Ive been so dedicated to this whole process and haven't been drinking for over 6 months now and eating incredibly well and off coffee for all this time - since the middle of last year to "prep" my body for pregnancy. AND he won't even cut out coffee!!! one thing I asked him to do for TTC and he thinks Im the one that can't do the things we need to do for a baby! Anyway so thats where we are at. We get married tomorrow so from then we are officially TTC.... ov expected around 24th April by which time FH's family will have left and we will have the house to ourselves to make it happen.
Sorry for the rant ;) anyway ladies, Ive got lots to do today! Big day tomorrow - wish me luck. See you all in a few days
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mummystheword
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Posted: 11 April 2014 at 8:34am |
Have a great day DJKAF!!!! hope it is amazing for you and hubby to be :) YAY for the trying ...the 24th is so close! Day before anzac weekend haha perfect :)
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Bellaz
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Posted: 11 April 2014 at 4:54pm |
Have an amazing day tomorrow, DJKaf! Hope it all goes well and you have a wonderful time with your family and friends.
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Rebecca142173
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Posted: 12 April 2014 at 9:57pm |
Hi All, I was wondering if I could join your thread. My husband and I have been together for around 6 years and were married about a month ago. We have been talking about TTC for a while now however my doctor has advised me to lose weight before we start trying so I am in the middle of trying to lose 20kg before we can start. It has been really hard not having anyone to talk to about it as we don't want to tell our parents as they are both likely to be very excited as it will be the first grandchild for my parents. The only person who does know is my best friend. It would be great to have some people on here to talk to about it. Thanks
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binklemouse
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Posted: 13 April 2014 at 5:19pm |
DJKaf I hope you had the BEST day yesterday! What beautiful weather!
Hi Rebecca! Welcome! :D I think a lot of us here enjoy having someone to share with that isn't from 'real life' so you're in the right place x
Edited by binklemouse - 13 April 2014 at 5:20pm
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