Waiting to TTC

I am from the Manawatu and am to start trying soon for Baby Number 1! I just bought a onesie that says 'Baby xxxxx' ... going to use it to announce pregnancy to DH and possibly family. Cute!

We aren't going on honeymoon bellaz. We have FH's parents here from Tunisia and so we both took the time off work to hang out with them. So we have another week off after our wedding then we are back to work :( But maybe we will go later in the year somewhere. I like the idea of hawaii, but it will depend on babes. I was saying the other day we will either go on honeymoon or have a baby, whatever comes first. Got a few laughs but its quite true, if we get pregnant I wont want to fly. 

Does anyone else find it hard to talk about baby making with their DH? I know mine is reluctant and I know he finds the idea terrifying, but I feel like I should be able to talk to him about it without him automatically feeling harrassed.
Maybe I need to pick my moments better....

binklemouse wrote: Does anyone else find it hard to talk about baby making with their DH? I know mine is reluctant and I know he finds the idea terrifying, but I feel like I should be able to talk to him about it without him automatically feeling harrassed. Maybe I need to pick my moments better....

Binklemouse I found it really hard with our first baby - so basically I just didn't talk about it. It was hard enough for him to have unprotected sex, let alone actually discuss that it might result in a baby! They DO want it, but for my DH it was more the fear of being the sole provider - the male responsibility of caring for a family - not fear of having a baby, as we knew we both wanted kiddies (I would never have married him without having THAT discussion!). I think the only discussion we had about it was one night when DH said "what are we doing?" and I said "we're just seeing what happens" and he accepted that. I never spoke about ovulation, my cycle, never got upset (in front of him) when I got AF, never let him know if I was testing, basically just acted very cool and calm about the whole thing! I came on here for emotional support as I didn't want anyone to know we were trying (aside from my sister). He was thrilled when I got my BFP and he was amazing and supportive during the pregnancy, but don't expect them to 'fall in love' until baby is born. It was much easier to discuss second time around as he knew what he was in for and we both knew we wanted a baby sometime this year (maybe not this soon but we're happy about it now). Well that was my experience anyway :)

I am trying to be the same Dot. I have kept most of my pining, studying fertility/ovulation etc pretty much to myself and have been very grateful for the forum!! He has occasionally shown interest in my cycle (only lately) and I have explained it to him. He said 'we didn't have sex ed at school!!' (Catholic boys school hehe), so he did seem to want to know.
Now he does know it's hard for me to do the whole 'let's just see what's happening thing...'

We have talked about starting this April but now it's here I am feeling quite emotional and worried that he's going to back out on me. I am trying to think of a way to discuss it with him WITHOUT crying and without him feeling cornered because I know that does no good. :/

So! I was brave last night and thought about my approach. I decided my point of view would be that he said we could in April so of course we will in April. We went out for dinner and I said ‘oh, I’m so excited that it’s April, are you excited?’ (knowing he isn’t haha….) He said ‘is that a trick question?’ He knew what I was talking about and said he was worried about not having a job. I told him he would by then and that delaying a few months would make no difference to us financially because I wouldn’t go back to school for a Feb, March or maybe even April baby, and that waiting would also mean our baby would be younger when she/he went to daycare. He counted on his fingers, nodded a little then said he wants me to still have fun on our holiday (ie. Not be pregnant, drink lots of cocktails), which showed me he didn’t really understand the ‘cycle’ discussion because there is no way I can get pregnant before our holiday. So YAY. I feel much better and was glad I didn’t build it all up and have a big blub in front of him (which I am prone to do…).

Excuse the novel!

Well my fertile days are at the end of our holiday! So he's not getting away with contraception there.
I will 'enjoy' my holiday a lot more knowing I am trying to make a baby than I will drinking cocktails hehe.

I found going off the pill was a good baby step towards making babies. I explained to DH that it was something I wanted to do in preparation for eventually making a baby. It also made him in charge of contraception again which was a nice change. I have been off the pill since September.

I also announced when I was starting elevit which was another gentle prompt. tehe.

Funny the ways we have to 'handle' things.

Edited by binklemouse - 09 April 2014 at 5:42pm

Yes that's how I put it Bellaz. I said I wanted to go off the pill to prepare and explained it was nothing to do with wanting to have a baby right then. I didn't really give him much of a say in the matter. He did a little theatrical whinge about having to use condoms haha, but it's been fine since then.

Have a great day DJKAF!!!! hope it is amazing for you and hubby to be :) YAY for the trying ...the 24th is so close! Day before anzac weekend haha perfect :) 

Hi All,
I was wondering if I could join your thread. My husband and I have been together for around 6 years and were married about a month ago. We have been talking about TTC for a while now however my doctor has advised me to lose weight before we start trying so I am in the middle of trying to lose 20kg before we can start. It has been really hard not having anyone to talk to about it as we don't want to tell our parents as they are both likely to be very excited as it will be the first grandchild for my parents. The only person who does know is my best friend. It would be great to have some people on here to talk to about it.
Thanks