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Snappy 
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Joined: 27 August 2007
Location: lower hutt
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 Topic: Advice please (I really hate doing this!)
Posted: 11 April 2009 at 8:04am |
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Sorry, have regretted putting my personal life on here, especially given the situation! Thank you both for your advice.
Edited by kaiz231
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Mummy to two beauties... Formerly Kaiz.
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my4beauties
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Location: NZ
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Posted: 11 April 2009 at 8:41am |
Have PM'd ya 
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My babies: R (9),G (7), J (5) 
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choco69
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Posted: 11 April 2009 at 8:52am |
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oh dear looks like you are having a really rough time of it at the moment - i don't think anyone is essentially to blame - it's one of those times of miscommunication we all seem to get
couple of things to think about:
* do you think DH is attention seeking?
* do you think he feels like he is a priority in your life?
* do the two of you spend much time together without the children?
* does he spend much time with the children without you there?
sounds to me like he is feeling insecure and is acting out for attention, alot like a child would (as my mother tells me men never completely grow up)
is it possible for the two of you to sit down and have a really open talk (although wouldn't say you asked for advice from anyone he seems particularly sensitive about it) - i know it's hard talking about emotional issues (i personally always end up in tears which never helps things) - you could always lead with how important he is to you and to the children and then tell him things are not going well between the two of you at the moment and you need to know what is going on in his head and heart if you are to try and make things better
good luck and let us know how you get on
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Bizzy
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Posted: 11 April 2009 at 9:09am |
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if it was the other way round i would say it sounds pre menstrual... but its not!
if this isnt normal behaviour for him there might be an underlying issue for him, and you know men they cant seem to open up and communicate problems.
if this is normal behaviour he sounds like a git himself might need the hard word!
sometimes i know with me and my hubby that we just need a chance to reconnect, be together and relax and have a bit of fun together, like we did before kids... maybe that might help in this situation?
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Bizzy
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Posted: 11 April 2009 at 9:10am |
do you want us to delete the replies too?
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Snappy
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Posted: 11 April 2009 at 9:15am |
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Hehe, no thats fine thanks Bizzy. It is normal, weekly behaviour for him.
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Mummy to two beauties... Formerly Kaiz.
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xox6Girls1Boyxox
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Posted: 11 April 2009 at 9:18am |
Big Big hugs Hun  ... I'd be inclined to agree with your friend re emotional abuse, especially if it's making you think your at fault.
Men can be sh*t's sometimes, & they tend to get their knickers in a twist more than us woman over the most silliest things...Pretty disrespectfull yelling at ya like that in front of the baby also...
Keep in mind you've done nothing wrong ok.... Sorry I couldnt have been any more help but Chin up honey, I hope hope things get better...
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FreeSpirit
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Posted: 11 April 2009 at 12:41pm |
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Hey lady, I read your post earlier, and yes it sounds like E. A., but my DP is very much the same (even uses the same line about his parenting). I just wanted to give you a big hug and say that if your like me, BS aside, you probably love him, and you have a beautiful family together. As long as the good things outweigh the negatives then it's worth talking it over and staying right where you are. Sometimes you just need a vent over the BS things men do. PM me anytme if you want a chat.
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Snappy
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Posted: 11 April 2009 at 1:22pm |
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Thank you all.
DH left his wedding ring on the duchess this morning, not sure whether hes trying to play head games or whether he has taken it off and forgotten to put it back on.
Im sure we can sort all of this out, its not major, perhaps we just arent spending enough time together with all this working he is doing (He just finished 8 days straight)
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Mummy to two beauties... Formerly Kaiz.
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Advice please (I really hate doing this!)
