Am I normal, or is there something wrong?

newlywed wrote: I haven't read through all the replies but your Edinburgh scores are quite high. There are heaps of factors as to why you get PND. Sometimes it has nothing to do with whether or not you have a cruisy baby. TBH - my baby is brilliant. He sleeps well and feeds pretty well and is pretty happy. We have a good connection. I did have major breastfeeding problems for the first 4-6wks but once I was through that it was cruisy. However, I had loads of risk factors (which I knew about before having DS): - I have a history of depression and mental illness (depression) in one member of my family - I had a very difficult labour - I had stress during my pregnancy including a few health issues - I had marital problems and still do - I had financial problems and still do - I had feeding problems - Have very little support including family support - I had a long period of baby blues - about a week and then I "made myself" stop crying

Based on your list...

I have a slight history of depression, even though I tried to take my life when I was younger it was only mild depression.

Didn't have a difficult birth or pregnancy for that matter, although I was in a lot of pain from gall stones and migraines.

Some problems with DP.

Some money problems too.

No feeding problems.

More support than I need.

Never had the baby blues!

When dp leaves the house is when it goes down hill for me, Lily will just start crying when I look at her and completely won't smile for me, but if anyone else is there she will, she won't even coo for me anymore? Almost like she see's my smile is fake or something

I have to take her to get her 5 month jabs in about a weeks time so will book in to see the doctor too, I guess my main worry is what dp will think, and I know that is just so stupid but it really worries me that he will be disappointed or angry. The other thing is I am the only on in my family to ever have depression. So they all won't understand. When the doctor said I had mild depression all I got told was "I have nothing to be depressed about and it's all in your head."

I just want to be happy and enjoy my baby like I used to be able to, I can't even cry anymore I just feel emotionless.

It's funny, I cancelled my appointment to the doctors, although that's not the funny part and in fact I don't think any of my post will be funny, but I've found making myself busy and now that we've started a class at playcentre that I am feeling a bit happier and wondering if I should still go to the doctor or not

I posted something in the "what dumb thing" thread about my family, and I think I may have had a tiny bit of prenatal depression in regards to the way my dp was acting and my family was reacting, I found myself sitting in my room crying almost daily unless I was out spending some money trying to feel better and then when I got home I would cry about wasting money.

I encourage you to go. But they yeah I canceled my appointment... So not a great example. I guess I will wait for another bad day then do something about it... Which is stupid.

amme_eilyk wrote: hugs to both of you minik8 and nicole. I have no history of depression in my family so although they are trying to understand they just dont get it. feeling the guilt (I dont have it as bad as some people do with their lives) is part of depression unfortunately. Once you make up your mind to do something about it you generally feel that little bit better. It is really hard and it does put a lot of pressure on your dh and sometimes other family members. It is a struggle to get myself out of bed in the morning or do anythign round the house he is more like a parent than a husband at the moment. I just did my edinburgh score and it was 24. I have prenatal depression, and have been suffering from nausea and vomitting but all i can think is I dont have it as bad as those who are in hospital with it, how on earth do they cope, and what is wrong with me since I am not coping.

Haven't read all the thread so may need to edit but...
I was in and out of hospital with severe hyperemesis and I gotta say it was way harder at home!!! I was alone and stressed that I couldn't do much even though I could see jobs and stuff around the place. Atleast in the hospital you don't see the housework, smell the food, or get left by yourself for long periods of time

LilNic my list certainly wasn't exhaustive. Looking back over it I didn't include when you have a difficult baby eg. colic, reflux, medical problems, or generally crying. Generally there's often stress before(pregnancy), during or after birth that can be any kind and/or difficulty adjusting to motherhood.

However for some women it's just the hormones they react to. I think Bobbie mentioned that was her situation.

I think the Edinburgh score helps, and talking to your GP and a counsellor if you can. I really didn't want to have PND so I forced myself to stop crying with the baby blues and just avoided it but the longer you leave it the worse it gets and the longer it is to recover from it.

I know, when I read your list I though there was quite a few things missing, I truly have a great baby with no problems, nothing to complain about.

It's funny how busying yourself can make you feel a bit more normal. I was talking to my MIL about it, she said she felt the same, when you are home all day with baby and no one to talk to really...