Breastfeeding...

Should i feel bad that im not getting into this breastfeeding deal? I thought i would.. but im so sore and everyone is saying "you'll get it dont worry" and i know its only been like a week, but i dont think i can keep it up.

Everyone is saying "you have to breast feed" blah blah. And today i was in tears cause i cant do it. Everyone makes me feel guilty cause i want to stop and put her on formula.

Help?

get some lansinoh, it is in a purple tube from the pharmacy, and it will help.

it really does come down to how much you want to feed, because you do have to persevere, you do have to work at it, and it is uncomfortable. set yourself goals, think you want to get to a month, then you want to get to 6 weeks, then 3 months etc etc. it does help. your milk has only just come in, and it is a really difficult time as you and briahna try to settle things down. your hormones are all up in the air too at the moment, and things that dont normally seem hard become impossible.
there will be times you will want to cry at the sound of your baby waking up, you will dread having her anywhere near you, because you know you will have to feed her - and i dont mean because it will hurt, but because it is very hard to get your head around the level of dependance on YOU. noone else can feed her, and that is hard to come to terms with. be nice to yourself though, try to treat this time as the 4th trimester. keep her close, dont think you should be getting out and about, or doing too much. give yourself time to recover, and settle into your new job.

persevere, if that is what you want to do. know that in 8 short weeks time it will become easier. but if you really dont want to carry on, then stop. i only offer this advice: you can always start formula, but you cannot start breastfeeding again. and when your hormones are back to normal and you are feeling less like you have been hit by a bus, how are you going to feel about stopping? ( i know its so annoying when people go on about the hormones and tiredness etc etc, it sucks being a cliche, but it is true unfortunately.)

goodluck, i hope things get easier soon for you. briahna is a beautiful wee thing, you must be so proud of her!

It's all been said so well above, but I wanted to add my support and tell you that I too found it really hard with breastfeeding to begin with. It took a long while to get confident and actually begin to enjoy it. There was a while there where I cringed everytime DD cried because I just couldn't face another feeding session.
I love it now, and will be really sad when DD weans.

Can your midwife help?
Not much help, but sending hugs your way and hoping you have a good night tonight.



Edited by Mazzy

Hi,
I found it really difficult too, I got engorged when my milk came in and ended up with mastitis and cracked nipples. You can buy nipple shields to help with the pain. Although my bub would not latch on when I tried to use them. I also expressed from the most painful side, I had more than enough milk so was able to feed him on one side for 24 hours which really helped and I put the extra in the freezer for later on.

I have now put bub on formula because the mastitis kept coming back and gp was not happy about giving me antibiotics every other week plus was making me miserable.
I think that it would be good to set yourself a time to try until and then if you're still not happy stop. If you end up still dreading each feed etc it will not help, it is far better that bub has a happy healthy mum than breastmilk. Just don't stop before giving it your best shot as you may regret it a few weeks later when things have settled down.

Also do you have good support at home, it very important when breastfeeding to concentrate solely on that, and helps if someone else can take care of house work, and even bathing and changing bub so that you aren't trying to do everything and that you are able to sleep while bub is sleeping, the exhaustion compounds everything and blows it all out of proportion.

And if you do decide to stop and anyone especially strangers make rude remarks, like the lady in countdown who told me I should be nursing when I picked up tub of formula, tell them you were born without any nipples!!!!

Thank you so much for the advice everyone.

P.S. I had a horrible time for the first couple of weeks... first no milk, then tonnes of it, then blood blisters and cracked nipples. Eeeek, I'm horrified at the thought! Eventually everything settled down and it was fine.

Hey Melln,

i am just coming through the other side of where you are. I was lucky (in some ways) that Tom and I had to stay in hosptial for a week as it meant I really started to get a handle on the feeding thing with HEAPS of support around me. But I am only just getting confident enough to do it in front of people or to change my positions! and last night for the first time I sat there at 4am with him latched onto my sore boob and thought..."this aint too bad after all".

That said, if you choose not to BF, dont feel guilty. A happy mum = happy bub!

It does get easier in time. DS is now 9.5 weeks old and I like that I can feed him instantly anywhere without having to think about how many bottles to pack, mixing and heating bottles when you are out or getting up to make up a bottle in the middle of the night. What helped me was viewing feeding-changing-cuddling as my full time role and doing the bare minimum around the house. There is some great support around including la leche league, lactation consultants, family centres. Your midwife should be able to give you some advise and refer you to these networks if needed.