biting

jake has started the delightful habit of biting.
Here's what I have done so far:
Mum bit him back - hard result: He laughed at her
I smacked him - hard result: he laughed at me and hit me back
I explained to him that biting was not nice result: he laughed at me, hit me and bit me again
I walked away and said I didn't want to play with boys that bite result: he laughed and bit my leg

So i give up and the vampire child is winning.

Has also been hitting Taine as well.

I'm pretty sure it's because of the lack of attention - Lewis is now gone, and he has Taine to compete with. I don't have the energy or time to run around with him as we did when Lewis was here. We do some things together, but not as active.
Terrible twos starting early????

Blair never went through the biting stage, thank god. Sounds like you have tired everything possible, so sorry no ideas from me.
Hopefully he will grow out of it really fast.

Edited by kasbee

I have a 20 month old who scratches and hits.  Whenever she does it, I get down to her level and look her in the eyes and hold both her hands (so she can't scratch or hit me again) and say that scratching/hitting is not nice and if she does it again, she will go into time out.  If she does it again, I follow through and put her into time out for 1.5 minutes (1 minute for every year of their life).  I actually put her in the spare room at the moment because I don't want her associating her room as a place of punishment.

Then when I take her out I get down to her level again and explain again that it's not nice to do things like that and give her a hug and say let's go outside/read a book or whatever.  It has worked so far and she won't do it again for ages, but when she does do it again, I follow the same process.

Obviously the first time, she had no idea what timeout was, but she learnt and now sometimes just the mention of time out stops the behaviour.

It is a horrible stage and so hard to know what the right thing is to do.  Roll on this stage passing!  Good luck to you. 

Thanks Anna. Course starts next week so we'll see how "amazing" i feel after that!!

Jake is 15months, do you think he'd understand time out? And where? At the moment we are living with mum, so very limited space, and like someone else said (can't be bothered scro0ling up) i erally don't want him to associate his bedroom, or cot with punishment. grrrr?!@#!$@#^%#

I remember when my sister used to bite me, I always ran to mum, so mum told me one day to bite her back, I did and she never did it again.

For Jack, I think time out would work, if you are a supper nanny watcher you could try some of her ideas, naughty corner, step, stool, chair, rug. The spot can be anywhere, he just has to stay there.

That's so true about their bedroom having way too much stuff in there for it to be considered punishment.  We were up north last weekend and I had to give Gabrielle time out for - guess what - scratching, so I put her in the bedroom we were staying in at mums place.  There wasn't the usual protest and when I went in there afterwards, she was sitting on the floor with the contents of my makeup bag all around her.  Amazing the destruction they cause in only just over a minute.  But, still had the desired effect because she still hasn't scratched or bitten since (touch wood).  I like the sound of it being a consequence rather than punishment.

Really agree with the pick an approach and stick with it.  Liz, it doesn't matter what approach you choose, just keep using the same one everytime he bites.  I'm sure he would be fine with timeout at 15 months (if that's the method you choose).  He won't know what it is at first, but it won't take long for him to get the gist of it. 

We spend the first year and a bit dying for them to get all their teeth and the teething process ending, then when they get their teeth, we sometimes with they didn't have them!!  I keep Gabrielle's nails pretty short too!

we have a matress just inside the door of paris's bedroom and she has to sit on that, with her door open - punishment for screaming and yelling atme while in time out, is to have the door closed - (remarkably she usually stays there) or be moved to sit on the mat by the front door - which is away from where she can see what's going on.   

With the biting back thing - just a question... how are you reinforcing to your kid not to bite if you just demonstrate the exact thing by biting them back? it is ok for mummy to bite? maybe when they are older it might work - but at this young - they don't associate it, all they know is mum is hurting them they don't put that fact togehter with the idea that that is how others feel when THEY bite". Every one does things different ways, not bagging anyone and sorry if i offend, but just a point to ponder.

If Jake's hitting Taine, move him away somewhere, and tell him you would like to spend time with him when he is ready to be gentle to his brother, put him somewhere where he can see you attending to Taine, and tell him that when he is ready to join in nicely he can come to you. if it happens again, warn him, and repeat - after the third time warn him that he will go into tim eout if it happens again. the first few days you try this you might have to do it a heap, but it will soon get less and less.

defiantely agree with Maria on the praise thing - really go overboard when you see him being gentle to his brother, and reinforce it each time he goes to touch him,eg"remember to be gentle" or "Taine likes it when you are gentle to him/give him nice hugs/don't hit him" if he starts to be rough, get his hand and guide it, and say "gentle" that way you are showing him exactly what you want to do.

hope this helps


Edited by mum2paris

Maya has time out in the bathroom. She can't reach the door handle to get out. Used to be the hallway but I couldn't make her stay there.

semi bump

It may just be a stage he is going through. Abby was biting a lot at around ten months and yep I know what you mean about sharp teeth and pitbulls. We used to just firmly say no and put her down on the floor or move her away, and we used to do this constantly everytime she bit us it was the same. If she kept comming back and biting I would move away. I don't know if she stopped because this method worked or she just got bored or outgrew biting but she is now 13months and hasn't bitten in over 6 weeks. Good luck those little beggers can really hurt!