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BeLoved View Drop Down
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    Posted: 03 August 2009 at 9:18pm
Does the mothers guilt ever get any easier or does it just get worse?

Somedays I feel guilty for DD watching something on Playhouse Disney while I try and get things done or I feel guilty because I have been out most of the day and she has not had much time to play on the floor etc. it actually seems that I always feel guilty about something that I have or have not done and that I am not a good enough parent. Don't get me wrong I don't let it get me down, but I do think will this guilt ever end?
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BaAsKa View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote BaAsKa Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 August 2009 at 9:44pm
nop never! My mum still feels guilty about silly little things from when i was little!!!

I always feel guilty about little things, mostly at night time when my brain is going a million miles!! and its generally got something to do with my boys and i end up feeling like i wana wake them up and give them a big hug because i feel bad!!!, mainly over things like Bay not getting desert because he didnt eat his tea!
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.Mel View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote .Mel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 August 2009 at 9:45pm
Personally I wouldn't be feeling guilty, tomorrow is another day.. IYKWIM... if you don't get to do something one day try and do it the next... and if you never get around to it, it was never meant to be done in the first place.

Mummy guilt is a biarch... but I think as they grow up and you have more kids the guilt doesn't take you over as much - you know?

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote BeLoved Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 August 2009 at 9:56pm
Yeah I did not think it was going to magically go away! Oh well at least we know we aren't the only ones feeling it I guess.

I am a big believer in the "Tomorrow is another day" philosophy but still mastering the art of relating it to parenting I guess.


edited to make sense!

Edited by HeidisMum
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Maya View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Maya Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 August 2009 at 10:44pm
Nope, it doesn't really ever go away, but you do learn to put it into perspective. I guess my only advice is don't let it consume you - we had a really rough road when the gremlins were born and even now I suffer really badly from the "shoulda, coulda, wouldas", but at the end of the day, I can't change it. It is what it is, and the best thing I can do now is to get on with making each day the best it can be.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote LittleBug Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 August 2009 at 12:09am
I know the guilts well... but honestly, the fact that you feel guilty for letting her watch a little TV when you need to get something done, or you feel guilty that she doesn't get some floor time on a day when you are super busy.... to me that signals that you are an awesome Mummy that is making an effort to see that she DOES get a lot of floor time, and DOESN'T spend all day in front of the box. IYKWIM?!

Chloe (4 years) and Oliver (3 years).
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bobbie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 August 2009 at 10:40am
yes definitely try to put it in perspective - she is loved, has a warm safe home and food in her belly and a mum that is trying to do the best she can. A little TV and a little bit less floor play time won't hurt - most parents have to do that sooner or later.

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote busymum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 August 2009 at 6:45pm
Sometimes I have to remind myself that it's good for kids to not have their parents to play with all the time. A little bit of playhouse won't hurt her (or even just playing with some toys on her own). Otherwise she can start following you around if she really wants! I think it's a good thing to teach kids that yes, we will play with them and look after them but we also have responsibilities (as will they, some day) that need attending to; ie they are not the centre of the universe!

Talk to those guilt pangs and start believing that you are doing a good job!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Natalie_G Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 August 2009 at 8:57pm
awww hun

I feel guilty not giving Arianne all my attention all day long I do have housework to do aswell. I took Arianne to daycare today and I nearly cried when she cried because she couldn't see me I feel guilty about having to put her in daycare although it will only be 2 days a week to start off with I suppose its better than a full week straight away.

See you and Heidi on Friday...can't wait.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Shezamumof3 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 August 2009 at 9:33pm
Yep sometimes I feel guilty about things I have or havent done!
Like being out all day and Caden missing his sleep, or sitting on my butt and not really playing with him cos Im so tired at the moment, sometimes he wont really want to eat dinner and I feel like its my fault,,like is he sick of the food I give him, tonight he picked at his veges and had a bit of egg. and thats all he wanted...
But then I sit down and think about it all, and I KNOW im a damn good mum to my boy He is thriving according to his plunket book, he is always(except when teething and not getting his own way) a happy boy and he has two parents who love him to bits, and I do get down and play with him and I always chat to him even if Im on the computer and stuff.

Each day is different We have bad days and good days! Today, Caden didnt go to bed until 2 for his nap cos I was out all morning, when we got home he was grumpy as and didnt even want to eat, so I put him to bed and he slept 2 hours, got up and didnt want much dinner, but was still happy as lark So not to worry!
Tomorrow is another day!

I hope that all made sense lol

Edited by Sheza

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