Is it really necessary??

I have read heaps of posts and threads on here about kids needing to go to playgroups/daycare etc to socialise with other kids and adults but does it really make a difference to them if you don't. My wee girl is 18months old and has never been to playgroup or daycare. I have had the intentions of joining her up with a playgroup but the sh*t hit the fan last year and I didn;t get around to it and still haven't this year so far.

But for those who haven't done the daycare/playgroup thing, does it feel to you as though your kids have missed out or are less socially confident than those who do go to these things.

She has the odd play date with a couple of kids she knows and spends all day with me and grandma. She also spends time with her dad everyday after work and sees her aunty and uncle quite regularly so its not as if she sees no one but me all the time.

Daniel didn't go to coffee group or playgroup or anything like that. He started daycare in sept/oct last year only for 9hrs a week, thats the minimum they would allow. Thats 3x3hr sessions and in all honesty he was an outgoing kid beforehand and would get along fine with new people but hes really come out of his shell since going to daycare. Its great to see and he loves it and I love the time away from him.

Its not essential but thats our experience.

its not essential but ass long as they have some contact with other kids....for me it was half about him and half about me needing a break and we both benefit a lot from it..

We don't do anything "formal" either, daycare here is a RIP OFF so Callum won't be going unless we're still here when he's 3 (and even then I am really struggling with the idea).

I have quite a few friends with babies around the same age and we do playdates once or twice a week, I take C to do fun things like the zoo or the Gardens or whatever sometimes twice a week sometimes once a fortnight, depending on what else is going on. When he was tiny I went to a couple of coffee groups (set up by friends so we mostly knew each other prior to having kids) but that was more for me than for Callum IYGWIM.

Even now the playdates and things are more for me than Callum, he's at an age now where we can watch the kids get into stuff while we sit and try and catch up over coffee and inevitably spend the afternoon chasing the kids round and stopping them from accidentally eye gouging each other or tipping water all over the floor

I think it really does depend on you and your child. Callum and I BOTH go crazy if we don't get out of the house at least once a day - but that doesn't mean that he needs to be interacting with kids or doing baby stuff that whole time. Sometimes we just go for a walk to the park or to the supermarket

I'm not sure it makes that much of a difference, just don't tell my MIL I said that DD goes for 2X 3hr sessions a week, partly for me to have a chance to catch up on chores I'd rather do without her around and take some time out, partly because she loves it so much. I'm not just saying that, she really does.

I say 'Kindy Hollie?' and start listing off the teachers names and she grabs her bag, sticks a disposable on it, her lunch box on it etc (shes 14 months, she hasn't got the hang of zips yet) and waits by the back door. She walks up the ramp at the kindy herself, and goes towards her age side when we are in. She enjoys the interaction with the kids. Saying all of this, we don't do the usual music groups etc, we're limited with options out here!

Personally, at 18 months, do what works for you. 18 months is little! I'm not meaning this as a critique of Bunintheoven, but I remember reading on another forum about the pressure to "educate" your young toddlers and how there was almost a message of "what you do at home and the opportunities they get there aren't enough" and it challenged me and made me realise that the time we have pottering at home is really important and absolutely OK. Now, that said, Daniel's been in part time DC since 7 months and really thrives off it and it works for us.

For me, one thing that is important is socialisation - I'm quite shy and have low self-confidence and feel quite awkward in new social situations and I am paranoid that Dan will turn out like me! My parents didn't really have friends and I didn't have much social interaction as a child and becuase I'm so paranoid, I am pleased that Dan gets the social interaction at DC but I wouldn't send him there for that if there weren't other primary reasons. Like the others have said, there are lots of ways those skills can be developed in ways that work for each individual family. And hey, she's going to get a wee brother or sister soon - she's going to get a crash course on socialisation!

My daughter has never been to any sort of daycare or playcentre and she is one of the most outgoing, social kids I have ever seen. I am always getting comments from people about her lovely outgoing nature (they all assume she is a second child because she is so confident and social).
Since she was around 6 months old I have made an effort to take her to organised group activities though. She has done swimming lessons and jumping beans as well as baby gym and music/movement class. We also have regular playdates with her friends.
I guess I am saying that you don't necessarily have to send your child to a daycare/playgroup enviroment to give them social interaction. Perhaps check out the classes around your local area. They are usually lots of fun for both Mums and kids alike

I am glad you asked this question as I have wondered the same thing. DD (14 months) has never been to any organised activities and I don't belong to a coffee group but she is very confident and outgoing, we always do water play, sand play, finger painting and play doh etc. at home. I am hoping to take her to playcentre this year. But one thing I always think of is I was home with my Mum until I went to kindy and I am a confident, social person it does not seem to have had any ill effect on me...but I would say that about myself I guess