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busymum
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Topic: Fingernail biting Posted: 06 April 2007 at 9:53pm |
Hannah is biting her fingernails everyday and since her Dad also does , I'm trying to get her out of the habit as soon as possible. Any tried and true ideas?
I've been trying to use positive reinforcement so the last 3 nights we have been doing fingernail polish - polishing all the nails that haven't been bitten that night. Does that sound like a good idea? I never bit my nails so please help! lol
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meow
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Posted: 06 April 2007 at 10:14pm |
What's wrong with it? I bite my nails, I think it is a comfort thing.. or something to do when tired/stressed..
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busymum
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Posted: 07 April 2007 at 1:29pm |
Dh bites his until they hurt sometimes, I was worried Hannah would do the same.
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Jennz
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Posted: 07 April 2007 at 7:03pm |
Charlotte bites hers! I'm not bothered though- just saves me having to cut them I think what you're doing sounds like a good idea if you want to try and stop it though.
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busymum
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Posted: 07 April 2007 at 7:44pm |
Ok so here's a big question: should I bother?
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mamanee
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Posted: 07 April 2007 at 8:39pm |
As someone who has just stopped biting their nails, I really wish someone had encouraged me to stop when I was a lot younger. I bit them so badly that they would bleed. I had grotty looking fingers until I was 22 years old and I was really embarrassed by them.
I stopped biting them about six months ago and they are SO beautiful now.
I think as long as she isn't biting them right down till they hurt then it would be ok though.
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meow
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Posted: 08 April 2007 at 8:01am |
Yeah if she is biting them right down it might be a bit of a worry.. I only bite mine to get the nail off..saves cutting them! and I don't care about painting my nails!
Edited by meow
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busymum
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Posted: 08 April 2007 at 8:41am |
So I won't try bribing you then
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arohanui
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Posted: 09 April 2007 at 10:46pm |
When I was lil I used to suck my thumb, parents got me off it by having a sticker chart, and I got a little toy or something at the end.
I think what you're doing already though sounds FAB, with the nail polish, and you could maybe get her a special pink nail care kit with little scissors and a file in it, even a buffer.. and talk about how its important to look after your nails.
My friends who bite their nails wish that they had stopped it younger!! And they do get quite embarrassed by them, so it's probably easier to help your daughter get out of the habit now (could be easier said than done i know).
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meow
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Posted: 09 April 2007 at 10:51pm |
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mum2paris
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Posted: 23 April 2007 at 12:39pm |
Theresa, Paris does the same, hers are so low she is starting to get the split and icky skin around the nails, sometimes they bleed. they are bitten right down to the very start of the nail bed.
I told her that she can have nail polish on at her birthday if her nails are long enough but maybe a shorter term more achieveable goal might be better. i like the idea of painting th eones that are long enough but i do not know if any would ever get done.
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Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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busymum
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Posted: 23 April 2007 at 12:58pm |
That's what I'm finding Janine - 4/10 get painted, and she even tried saying "I don't want nail polish" so I toned it down a bit, I think she was finding it discouraging which was not my intention. But yep she's right down to the nail bed too, hasn't caused bleeding yet but it's such a habit that I'm sure it will someday. I just don't really know what to do, DH still bites his (just as low) and I never did. I try to keep hers cut short but I tend to forget, I now have to cut finger and toe nails x4
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mum2paris
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Posted: 23 April 2007 at 1:58pm |
mike bites his down to the nail bed too, he tried to grow them out once but found it sore as his finger comes up around the end of it now as it's so used to having no nail there.
Paris has even, shockingly, and gross, bitten her toe nails a few times. i go to cut them and they are short and i ask, and she says she has bitten them too. ew ew and ew.
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Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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busymum
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Posted: 23 April 2007 at 3:33pm |
Hahaha I've gotta post a pic on here! Briona and toes lol
*back to topic* I've been wondering if it is a genetic tendency or learned? What do ya reckon?
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MummyFreckle
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Posted: 23 April 2007 at 4:16pm |
Like eomachine, I bit mine until I was an adult! I stopped when I had an 'epiphany' in Amsterdam at age 27!!! (You prob get the picture!!!) I used to bit mine until they bled, and rip the skin all down the sides, it was awful, and I was so embarrassed of them during my teenage years - but for some reason I never stopped.
My dad bit his nails, but my mum always had beautiful nails (I would spend hours as a child watching her paint them....) My mum tried everything to get me to stop, that yucky tasting nail polish didnt work - I would just get used the taste, tabasco sauce - didnt work either!
I think its a learned behaviour - I saw my dad do it all the time, and I also associated it with stress from quite a young age, so when I was stressed or nervous I would nibble....
I was constantly nagged by my entire family about it for years and years, but eventually it was just something I decided to stop doing myself.
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jamesmum
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Posted: 23 April 2007 at 6:38pm |
I use to bit my fingernails as a child. I had to grow them so I could see them over the top of my fingers when my hands are turned around and I got a camera (I think I was about 10 or 11). My nails are really weak now except for when I was pregnant they were strong and grew like anything
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mum2paris
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Posted: 23 April 2007 at 8:50pm |
mine grow like anything, really quickly and really long. and so do ayjas, Paris's used to, but now they don't obviously.
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Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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bumblefoot
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Posted: 24 April 2007 at 6:06am |
I used to as a kid, but like someone said above, I had an 'epiphany' at about age 7-8yrs, after watching Mum painting and making a fuss of hers, and never did it again.
Another thing that Mum, my sister, brother and myself (and now DP) do is biting the skin on your lip, or picking it. Its a stress thing, and most of the time you do it subconsciously. I remember having a chuckle one day as there was me, Mum and Boo (short for Belinda) sitting in a row on the couch picking our lips.
As for whether it is learned or genetic, have a think about this one. My brother was brought up in foster care since he was 2yrs, as he had a few learning difficulties, and Mum had me her crippled DD to worry about. Now, he wasnt brought up with us or Mum, and yet when we caught up a few years ago, he does the same lip thing, AND but his nails like I did, as did Mum as a kid. Food for thought...
I think you are on to a good idea with the painting of nails, I remember the yucky tasting stuff only deterring me for a few hours, but I remember the sticker charts and rewards working well. But in the end it was just my choice to stop, but who knows if I would have without the support and encouragement from Mum?
At the end of the day, it is a comfort thing, and one possible thing you may try (worked with a child I nannied for) you could take her shopping for a 'really special teddy bear' and when you find him/her, tell poppet that every time she feels like biting her nails, she can squeeze bears paw, and if she is old enough, she can whisper in teddys ear about how she feels when she wants to bite. It may be she is bored, or worried, or angry, frustrated... etc. she will soon find herself confiding in teddy, and squeezing that paw, and the nails should grow. It doesnt take long for them to grow and look lovely and this will be incentive for her to keep it up. And maybe you will be able to se what her triggers are after a while and help her avoid them. (sorry if it sounds a bit clinical, but Im studying child psychology atm, so I have a deep fascination with it)
Sorry for the long rant, and best of luck with the nail biting.
Edited by bumblefoot
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nikkitheknitter
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Posted: 24 April 2007 at 10:56am |
Yep to the stress thing... compulsive nail biting is a form of OCD and even has a name - onychophagia
I bite mine horribly and always have. I spend 90% of my day trying to hide my nails from people seeing them as they are so deformed.
I am in the process of stopping biting them and have 4 whole decent nails! wooooohoooooo! (Honestly - huge achievement!)
I had stopped biting them when I had braces as it hurt my teeth too much and I literally couldn't chew them off but then when I found out I was pregnant with Hannah I started again in a big way. They were at their worst at essay hand-in time last year!
Anyway... while she might stop biting them herself, I wouldn't wish my nails on anyone. So keep up the positive reinforcement etc.
(Oh yeah, and my method for stopping biting at the moment is to change the habit from biting to painting with clear polish. Then I chew off the polish before I get to my nail! )
ETA: Oh yeah, and I started wearing a ring to remind myself that I want my nails to look beautiful. Would a cheap ring work with her?!?
Edited by nikkiwhyte
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busymum
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Posted: 24 April 2007 at 1:00pm |
Hmmm I'm getting the feeling that it's probably ingrained somehow and that if she is ever going to not bite her nails it will probably be when she can will herself out of the habit, when she's older. Would you guys agree?
Nikki the ring sounds like a good idea but she's not much of an accessories girl, already has a couple of pretty rings but they are at the bottom of the toy box
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