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CherryBaby 
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Joined: 14 June 2008
Location: Essex
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 Topic: Giving up works??????
Posted: 28 June 2008 at 5:47am |
People have told me that ya mind plays a big part in TTC and that "Giving up" works but how can that be when i dont have periods???????
What do we all make of this?????? 
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Vanillabean
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Posted: 28 June 2008 at 10:21pm |
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That "giving up works" thing really bugs me. Its like blaming people who are having trouble conceiving for being stressed. I really don't think that stress is usually a major factor, although I'm imgaine sometimes it can be.
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CherryBaby
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Location: Essex
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Posted: 29 June 2008 at 12:13am |
Yeah i know how u feel i get it said to me and it just feels like they dont understand then there like you just believe what u want to believe but if u feel somethings negative u wont believe it 
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Lulu
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Posted: 29 June 2008 at 4:15pm |
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It's such a load of rubbish, usually spoken by people who have never had any trouble conceiving. You can't just 'relax' or 'give up'. It is always on your mind. I remember when we were TTC I read some facts on stress and it's contribution to infertility. I remember that it stated that there was no proven link. People get pregant during hugely stressful times. If people can conceive in third world countries when the are starving and begging on the streets and during droughts etc... well I can't imagine any more stressful situations than that!
I know that people who say to 'relax and it will happen' would normally have the very best of intentions, but unfortunately it is just not helpful.
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CherryBaby
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Posted: 29 June 2008 at 9:37pm |
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i ahve polycystic ovaries and have only had 3 periods in my life time and im 21 years of age. When i split up with my x i was under alot of stress and thats when i had a period and i thought it may be a miscarriage(of which i still dont know) but my sister said to me "nah its was just the stress u was under so u got ur period" after that i didnt have any more periods and she was like "Giving up works" it just dont make sense does it if she reckons its stress that gave me the period that time.
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Maya
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Posted: 29 June 2008 at 9:42pm |
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What I want to know is how do you give up and how do you stop stressing about it? It's not like you can just turn your thoughts off! I think it's a ridiculous suggestion!
Besides, most people who do take a long time to conceive don't start out stressed about it, the stress comes from months/years of not being able to conceive so if stress was the cause, wouldn't they conceive in their first few months trying *before* the stress kicked in?
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CherryBaby
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Posted: 29 June 2008 at 11:54pm |
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maybe they arnt on about stress just about giving up and thats when it happens??? (NOT that i believe that crap). Im trying to get my periods so i can try and concieve i think about it but im not stressed so if stress is a reason, not being stressed hasnt worked for me.
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emz
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Posted: 30 June 2008 at 11:48am |
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I'll throw a spanner in the works and say it did work for us! lol. We were waiting to start clomid so were just doing the deed for fun and bam got pg with Jack (no cycles or anything). Miracles do happen but 'giving up' does not mean you'll get pg quicker at all.
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ginger
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Posted: 30 June 2008 at 11:59am |
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"Giving up" is not a cure for infertility. People who will need medical intervention to become pregnant will need medical intervention and that's all there is to it. Many people who have 'given up' have only been TTC for a shorter period of time, and bearing in mind that it's actually perfectly normal to take up to 2 years to become pregnant, perhaps part of becoming pregnant through giving up is simply a timing thing. eg. if you have PCOS for example, if you only have period once a year, perhaps you did the deed at the right time to become pregnant on that one cycle for the year. Do you know what I mean? I follow a blog where a woman went through 9 IVF cycles, had twins, wasn't anticipating having any more children, and yet conceived naturally (unfortunately the pregnancy was not viable) just through timing (she has about 1 or 2 periods a year) NOT through giving up!
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Cuinn Lachlan 23.1.09 - 22:00
Antonia Helene 4.8.11 - 09:41
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pikelets
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Posted: 30 June 2008 at 12:23pm |
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My friend was told she had unexplained infertility for 5 years - then after the 5 years they found out her husband had no swimmers.
Many failed IVF atempts later, they adopted a beautiful wee boy and then last year became pregnant out of the blue (7 years after they first started trying). They had given up completely on ever having their own children and were looking at adopting another one when their miracle happened.
I don't believe they simply got pg because they had "given up" or "relaxed" and neither do my friends.
Sure it may happen for some people but I believe the vast majority of couples with infertility problems can not conceive by giving up.
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ginger
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Posted: 30 June 2008 at 1:03pm |
 Star wrote:
My friend was told she had unexplained infertility for 5 years - then after the 5 years they found out her husband had no swimmers. |
That's dreadful! 
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Cuinn Lachlan 23.1.09 - 22:00
Antonia Helene 4.8.11 - 09:41
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pikelets
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Posted: 30 June 2008 at 7:21pm |
Sure was! Think they fell through the cracks on that one
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CherryBaby
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Posted: 01 July 2008 at 1:25am |
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emz what was u trying b4 clomid?
u hadnt given up tho had u , u was just on a break?????? just wondering
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Emily281
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Posted: 02 July 2008 at 11:49am |
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On the stress thing - I mentioned it to my gyno last week because my DH has an anxiety disorder and he said long term stress has no impact on fertility because the body adjusts. He said if its a short-term stressful event or something it could possibly delay Ovulation but long-term stress has no impact on either partner.
Made sense to me.
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TTC#1: Jan 07
Aug 08: Lap found and excised Stage 3 Endo
Nov 08: 2nd lap clear - given OK to TTC after next AF
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CherryBaby
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Posted: 02 July 2008 at 9:29pm |
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Well I had to have a 9am cortisol today i didnt know what cortisl was all about till I done some research on the internet basically it a hormone that is produced in your body if you are under stress so if it comes back normal because im sure im not under stress and some1 says to me "Just give up and it will happen" I can say NONONO i have medical proof that im not under stress lol
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Giving up works??????