families and xmas day...(vent sorry)

come on i know there is some out there who has something ticking them off this xmas.

and im sure some have this one in common..
Family especially those members that seem to try to ruin it for everyone else.

I have one of those in our family, if its not done there way, they just dont take part at all.

this yr we decide to do xmas a lil different we are always the ones dragging ourselves and all our kids from one place to another but only when it suits this said family member.
last yr we felt our whole xmas day and boxing day was ruined becoz, we all had ourself trying to keep from pissing this person off.
we were having a lovely xmas day and had plans to go for dinner with other half of family at 5pm.
only i get a text at 4pm saying we could go over earlier. i texted back saying we had company and would be over soon. for the next 30mins i get constant texts asking to come over now etc.
so my near 80yr old grandmother and mother and bro all had to leave becoz of it. so we get there at 4:30pm the kids had a bit of play. then they decide that we all have to leave soon and pretty much throw presents at the kids to the point that we couldnt even enjoy the time. we left feeling completely unwelcome and only invited coz it was xmas day and they felt ebliged.
boxing day we had plans to rock up at the beach just me, dh and the kids when we were ready. only it turns out that apparently they were too and we were expected to join them. the entire drive i got constant texts where are you, are you gonna be here soon. we arnt going to wait much longer. blah blah blah, at this point we were happy they were leaving. they left as soon as we got there, and we ended up having a very nice time doing what ever we wanted.

we decided that day that this xmas we are going to stay at the beach xmas eve til boxing day, and we would invite who ever the hell we like. all the family are looking forward to it. but oh no xmas isnt a family thing if other people are invited according to this person. so seeing our xmas heading for another day of being told where and when we have to be. me and dh have just said we dont care, you want to exclude yourself for such selfish reason got a head thats not our problem.

what really pisses me off is that we planned this in the 1st place so that we all got we wanted and nobody had to be running around on xmas to get places. and i dont get to see my sister, neice and nephew on xmas day which is the worst part for me. i cant remember not seeing my sister on xmas day even when she lived 2hrs maybe more away.

oh the joys of xmas day.

You never know, they may realise that they are being idiots and turn up, or they may stay away proving their point- which I think is silly. Do what you want to do, enjoy the day with your partner and kids, and whichever family that turns up.

Why not turn your cell phone off and enjoy your day as per the plan that works for you?

I am very thankful that my Inlaws never visit for Xmas or us visit them for Xmas. DH's decision not mine.

We are going to my brothers & I'm sure there will be a share of family drama's....

when i say beach i mean dh's mums place, she has been wanting to do xmas there for years so last yr after been treated like crap at dh's brothers place we decide along with mil to do our whole xmas out there.
i invited my mother as she is my fam and i have never gone a day with out seeing her and i certainly am not going xmas with out either. besides if she didnt come out they would end up at home by herself along with my kid brother. this was more than fine with mil. but according to bil, they arnt family and shouldnt be allowed to come.

lol I could go on forever.

We are lucky that my family and DH's family live 5 mins from each other and we live 30 mins from  DH's family so we can go down there do both familes in a day drive back and Waala.

I'm not however looking forward to DH's sister. After last years christmas when she blew up about her getting her dates mixted up over when we were staying at the beachhouse.
We havne't spoken to her since so it will be interesting....

Haha I don't think that we have ever had a christmas where its JUST been our family. We have always had friends who have no where else to go come along - fancy having the spend christmas alone! If they want to have christmas their way then they can stay at home, go ahead and have your christmas with your "family" whoever you choose that may be

That sucks for your BIL's wife's family. If you follow his logic they aren't family. Some people have strange ideas.

Up till this Christmas I have always done Christmas at home. The house I live in is the 'family home' as such. Sometimes its just been me, DD and Nana. Sometimes its been everyone, their kids, step siblings and assorted friends. This year after much contemplation DF and I decided we wanted to spend Christmas together in Australia with his family and introduce Sebastian. It would have meant that we wouldn't be here for Nana on Christmas day and someone else would have to take that responsibility on. The day we booked the tickets Nana had a internal bleed and was admitted to hospital. Two weeks later she passed away. Not the way I thought things would turn out.

Fallen