Gosh it's amazing what goes through your head isn't it. I have gone from not even remotely entertaining the idea of ttc again to being anxious that my endo will come back really bad if I don't get pg again soon.
6 MC angels DS born 04.01.14 DD born sleeping 09.05.16 22w5d
So happy for you BC to have that part done and it was a sense of releif for you. RD Im quite sure as baby had already passed away prior to birth no death cert is required only if the baby shows recognized signs of life at birth. All baby's over 20 weeks require a birth certificate. Hope that helps!
Oh RD I was the same right up until I had her. I'd resigned myself to not ever having kids as I'd said after that IVF it would be the end regardless. It wasn't until DH started talking about spending more money on IVF and how the whole thing had made him think that having kids wouldn't be so bad (he wasn't 100% worried about having kids at all) that I started to change my mind.
TTC since Oct 2009 4 x DI's failed IVF1 CP & MC IVF2 CP IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
Thanks GEO. ACtually I think i remember reading that somewhere now.
BC - what a "process" you have been through. Starting to think that you had your baby on the way and now back to starting again. I admire you getting through all of this
Just back from my session. Gosh it was hard and she asked a lot of questions that i really didn't know how to answer but ultimately I think it helped put a few things into perspective for me. And I think she'll be able to help me through the rest of the hurdles to come.
I'm totally wiped out now though. Glad I didn't plan to go back to work this arvo!!
6 MC angels DS born 04.01.14 DD born sleeping 09.05.16 22w5d
RD I'm glad your session was good but can imagine you're buggered after though!
Yes a process is rather a good way to describe it. Heartbreaking to lose Paige but whether it happened at 22wks or after she was born it was going to happen because she was not well. What's harder is changing my whole mindset. Adjusting to not now going on maternity leave in July. Not being a stay at home mum and having continue the daily grind of work instead. Now being able to play netball because I'm not pregnant anymore. That's what's hardest for me. When I was pregnant there was a future semi mapped out and now it's again unknown and I'm in limbo. But I'm ok. You'll feel brighter one day soon too RD. Never give up hope Hun xx
TTC since Oct 2009 4 x DI's failed IVF1 CP & MC IVF2 CP IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
You've totally put into words how I feel BC! That's what I'm struggling with. Going back to normal stuff cos life goes on and not doing the things you were looking forward to like finishing work decorating our sons room & setting up baby's room. The list goes on. I can't imagine going through this without having my son to keep me going. I have hope, there's a tiny spark there 😊
Edited by LP pka Rainyday - 25 May 2016 at 7:04pm
6 MC angels DS born 04.01.14 DD born sleeping 09.05.16 22w5d
I totally know how you both feel it's incredibly heart breaking - your not just mourning the loss of your wee girls but also the loss of her future and the future you had planned for her! That's where trying again straight away helped me! I also joined the gym and decided I would put all my energy into getting my body as healthy as possible to be able to carry another Baby!
Remember rd it hasn't been very long since we Micah so don't rush yourself into thinking you need to make any decisions yet!
I don't know if either of you have joined Sands in your area or gone to their support groups but just being around other people who have lost also makes you not feel so alone in your grief! I met some amazing ladies who are so close to me now!
Miscarriage 5 1/2 weeks Nov 14 Miscarriage 6 weeks September 15
I fully resisted at first RD. I would't drink, not even one and my refuge was coming home after work - not going to the gym or to netball training. I've just eased back into it. Anthea's right you've not long said goodbye to Micah so just take it easy on yourself. I find I still get overwhelmed easily and my tolerance of stress isn't what it was. My memory is a bit crap too especially if I'm out and about and around lots of people.
Anthea I've tried throwing myself into getting in top shape however you'd not know looking at the scales. They will not budge!! It's so frustrating. Trying to figure out what I'm eating that's holding me back because I'm doing more exercise than I was while pregnant.
I haven't joined Sands but would be interested - how do I go about it? If nothing else I'd like to be able to give back somehow as they were instrumental in a lot of what we were offered while in hospital.
TTC since Oct 2009 4 x DI's failed IVF1 CP & MC IVF2 CP IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
Damn head cold has taken hold 😞 MMotivational levels pretty low today. Trying not to look in the mirror too much cos even makeup won't hide the tired eyes. I ate terribly yesterday. It doesn't make for feeling physically better that's for sure. Will try to be better today. Bleeding looked to be finished but false alarm still going
6 MC angels DS born 04.01.14 DD born sleeping 09.05.16 22w5d
Ugh RD I had bleeding for about 3 1/2 weeks I think then had a week off and bam AF arrived. I was over the sight of pads that's for sure. Sorry you're not well and feeling blah. I had to hide the chocolate that we kept being given. And I started little with eating better. That meant I stopped chocolates, fizzy drink, juice. Then I stopped having brown sugar on my porridge and went for kiwifruit and yoghurt. Then when I got to the school holidays I stopped eating muesli bars and biscuits. Increased my intake of veges and looked for healthier options. Then slowly increased my exercise output - very slowly this old body hadn't moved like that for some time haha. Little steps hun and if you're unwell don't worry about what you're eating, you need comfort right now.
TTC since Oct 2009 4 x DI's failed IVF1 CP & MC IVF2 CP IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
Today has been so different. I actually felt genuinely brighter. It's such a relief. Having a day like today makes thinking of the future much less overwhelming. My baby girl must be sending me the strength I've been asking for ❤
6 MC angels DS born 04.01.14 DD born sleeping 09.05.16 22w5d
I was actually surprised how quickly my body reset itself. Hopefully it stays that way and I get utd just like *that* with the next ivf. I'm stoked to hear you're feeling brighter! Sometimes I think getting back into a routine can help a little bit, provides a distraction if nothing else. What have you got planned for the weekend?
TTC since Oct 2009 4 x DI's failed IVF1 CP & MC IVF2 CP IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
Ooh exciting bet DS will love that and exciting looking at show homes. Are you looking at building?
I've just got my usual trip to netball planned - an all day expedition as our team plays away (1.5hrs one way) because our local competition is pretty social and we prefer to play competitively. I've been pretty lucky each IVF that something has happened just hate the wretched chemical pregnancies and scared that'll happen again. But when I got pregnant with Paige I had a clean out of my uterus the cycle prior which seemed to reset my cycle and I'm sure made my lining better. So because of that I'm going with the theory that childbirth does the same lol. And it makes me not want to wait too much longer. Just gotta make the call to see the specialist - I seem to be good at talking about it but taking the plunge...well that's another thing haha.
TTC since Oct 2009 4 x DI's failed IVF1 CP & MC IVF2 CP IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
Yeah we're looking at building or buying in a better area as we are not zoned and the unzoned schools are not great to say the least. Friends around the corner from us sold their place in four days for an astronomical amount & I think our place is better LOL But we'll see as we have to buy into the same market. Micah has truly made me acknowledge that nothing in life is guaranteed so why not make the best of the things we can control. As you say talking about it and doing it are two different things! Best of luck with netball Hope the weather is better where you're going!!
6 MC angels DS born 04.01.14 DD born sleeping 09.05.16 22w5d
Weather was pretty crappy here yesterday but we won our game so that's a bonus. You're right you do have to make the best of things. My main thing is that I am longer going to be a hero and think I can do it all. There are so many things I do that I don't enjoy and do out of feeling like I should or because of obligation. Family and fun come first now. Losing Paige made me see how busy I am and that needed to change.
TTC since Oct 2009 4 x DI's failed IVF1 CP & MC IVF2 CP IVF3 Angel baby born 22.3wks
Seeing the show homes added a level of excitement which was crushed by the fact that there's no affordable land out there. But we'll see what happens. 😀 Had a wobble going to bed last night. Was quite suddenly overwhelmed with missing Micah. Missing being pregnant. But it passed quickly. DS slept in with no wake ups in the night yay👍
6 MC angels DS born 04.01.14 DD born sleeping 09.05.16 22w5d
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