boys and stuff

am doing an essay on boys and education for my English education paper at massey and have been doing a lot of reading.

one thing I read about recently was really interesting and was wondering what everyone else thought. it said that boys connect wioth people and bond with people through physical contact - often looking quite violent, and rather than saying "no kicking, no punching, etc" we should look for ways to incorporate this behaviour, such as getting the boys to recognise when this behaviour is hurtful, when it isn't appropriate, and when it isn't wanted.   and teaching them these things is more important than saying "no" strsight out.

Personally Jake and taine wrestle a lot and I had been saying "no" constantly, but then noticed that Taine - for the most part- doesn't mind. well, until he's knocked into the coffee table and cut his lip, But that would be teaching Jake more about appropriateness and situation and stuff. Dunno.

I'\m expecting to find LOTS of interesting facts to share, so you may find a few boring threads here and there - feel free to comment or ignore!

any tips and facts on boys will be most welcome. Ive always well hated is a strong word but not liked little boys, they are rough and well boys and now i have one of my own (who i love to bits of course and wouldnt change for anything) I want to make sure i raise him to be caring and respectful but not a mummies boy so yeah as i said any tips on boys would be great!!!

I'm still not sure on the whole topic - Jake isn't especially able to speak well enough to communicate his feelings (according to this book - typical of boys), so physical behaviour is how he communicates. Apparently phrases like "use your words" disadvantage boys as they aren't as verbal. still a bit up in the air to deciding whether I agree with this BUT am trying to decide whether I think this because I am an overally verbal person (can ya tell!?) or because I don't think it's a good idea full-stop......ugh, theories!

i find "use your words" not an effective tool with kids of either sex. i can just imagine a kid thinking "what words?" i have a lady at playgroup who says this all the time to her boy and i dont think i have ever heard him say anything at all.

I teach at an all boys school and we always comment on the amount of "touching" boys do. They are constantly pushing each other, head locks etc, just general rough and tumble and these are teenage boys! They seem to really like the physical side of things but its banned in the class room. watching them walk down the corridors is very interesting tho with the wee nudges etc...none of it is intentional violence just the need for contact.