What would you do?

having been in a similar situation with my dh before we got married. it is one of those things that you will not know how you will act until you get forced to make the decision. it has to be what is right for you now and it can be different to how you thought you would react in that situation and that is ok.

in my case i found r18 emails that dh had sent to someone that he had met online. I thought about it really carefully and I decided to stay with him after talking it through with him. It wasnt easy, and it has taken him a long time to earn the trust back, it still isnt completely back but our relationship is much stronger after dealing with it together. I set out my rules that I needed to cope and to be able to move forward in our relationship. Things such as having his email passwords, him leaving the online site where he met her etc. with dh it was more about the attention and he had no emotional or physical relationship with her. If he had I am not sure we could have moved on. Also a big part of moving on was making sure that we worked through why it happened and how to stop/manage it from happening again.

sorry it turned into a novel about me.

you just need to talk about it with your dp, see what he has to say on his side of things, and you say your side and decide what you want to do from there. just remember that it is your decision to make, not your friends or anyone elses.