Super attached toddler

sounds like what happened with us. She will be fine while you are away - it's mostly behavioural and as much as I know it sounds a bit mean, toddlers do try it on a bit, esp with their mummies. If there is one thing I would say, it is to spend a few days in the birthing unit bonding with your new one, because once you get home, you don't get much of a chance - I missed out as there were no rooms available, and I really regret it because I didn't get to have descent cuddles apart from feeding for nearly the first 6 weeks.

It is hard having two little ones, esp when the older suddenly requires 200% attention. Our little girl refused to have baths, threw all her food on the floor and threw massive tanties. But (and it suck to be told this over and over) it is just a phase, it;s short-lived and 8wks on, we are nearly back to normal :-)

we gave our then 17mo a present from the baby, and spoilt her a bit. Made sure everyone who came to visit after paid her attention before the baby & left the baby with DH and did a few things with DD on our own (walks/playground/music etc). Basically the poor little NB gets a bit ignored for the first bit, but things do come right quickly & 21months is a great age to give them some responsibility in 'helping' which makes them feel involved and important & keeps them occupied ;-)

I just started to read this tonite and wanted to reply but thought it would be too late, however, just did a search and your're obviously still waiting, bugger!

I was in a similar boat to you now, 4 wks ago. My DD is very attached to me and was worried how she would take it all with the new baby and me in hospital. Well, I spent 4 nights in hospital (had a elctv CS) and she would visit with DD everyday and although I talked to her about this well in advance for months actually, the reality was a bit different for her. DH did have a hard time of it, DD pine for me when she left the hospital each day, but really DH just had to deal with it. On the 3rd day I got him to leave DD with me for a couple of hours so he could get a break, and we spent some quality time hanging out, albeit in a hospital, lol. She helped me give bubs her first bath and we read books together and puzzles (make sure you have a armload of her favourite toys/snacks etc in the hospital. I made sure she had a gift from bubs to her and she bought one for bubs too (did that bout a weeks before and took to hospital).

So really the hospital thing was the most traumatising thing for her and she got over it, but she had no ill feelings toward bubs and still doesn't. I'm lucky that bubs is very easy going and sleeps a lot so I have the time to spend special time with her during the day, and DD takes her out to the beach most afternoons/evenings, I have been coming along too lately, which she is happy about.

Basically include her as much as you can, I understand that she's a bit younger than mine but feel your concern.    It will all work out as long as she has your time at some stage each day and you and others pay her attention also.    I agree with what was said re time in hospital, those 4 nights I didn't stress bout DD or DH, I just bonded with bubs and it was the most special time for us.

Hope all goes well, GL

I was worried about DS too as he had always been a mummys boy, DH was never allowed to do anything!

First night was apparently hell, but after 5 days in hospital they are bonding happily now!

DS is coping well with DD, always wants to be close tho, so when I'm feeding I get him to bring a book that I can read while I feed. DS loves getting blankets, or my water etc, I've even taking to not getting everything before I feed just so he can help out.

We worried about him regressing with his toilet training, but if anything he got better!

Altho everytime the midwife comes to visit he asks if she is coming to put DD back in my tummy!