Dear Non-Pregnant Person

Sell it all on TM!

Then use the money to buy nappies and other practical items that you will use- you can just say that because you had soooo many clothes you thought that would be a better way to use them.

I have a few knitwear items like that- HELLO! our baby is being born in October and we live in the Bay of Plenty.... be lucky if she wears each item once.

My ex MIL was horrendous for things like this.

Always commenting about something 'His clothes are too tight, that bath water is too hot, why isn't he wearing a hat, don't wake him up if he's done poos, just leave him'. Nothing I ever did was right in her eyes.

I remember going to stay with them for a few days when Sam was about 6-7 weeks old and being the nice person that I am I stood back and allowed her to do a few things like change him, feed him his bottle (she asked) and go and get him if he woke.     Just as we were about to leave she made a nasty comment that I didn't interact with my child enough and he needs more stimulation than what I was giving him and that I shouldn't let other people feed him because I need to start trying to create a bond with him myself.   We NEVER stayed with them again. I was beside myself for days after she said those things to me.

Oh and when Sam was three days old, she came over and bought her mother with her.    My midwife had just popped around to see me.   And MIL and her mother started berating the poor woman asking her to arrange the La Leche League to come around and sort out my breastfeeding and that I should go into some sort of home for young mothers who don't know what they are doing.

Now that I am no longer with her son, she is a completely different person. She comes over once a month to take him out for the day, she never comments about anything or says rude things, I think she is just thoroughly grateful that I allow them to spend that time with Sam.

I'm so happy that my new DPs mother and father are really nice people who don't interfere or say anything like that to me!

neeandsam - My ex-MIL was exactly the same. I had PND with my first two, thought it was only mild with the first. She knew this but instead of trying to help me through this time she literally took the babies away. She 'invited' herself to live with us and basically made my PND 10 times worse. Then she had the gall to tell me that I never look after my children and I should never have anymore because it was my fault my oldest have behavioural problems. And all that time my delightful ex stood there and didn't stick up for me.

This time around my soon-to-be MIL is being delighful. She is excited as bubs will be her first grandchaild but she has made it clear she will only help if asked and won't crowd us.

I love it!

I'm thinking of ways to email it around at the moment....maybe from DP's account!!!

I'm thinking about even printing it out and putting it on the fridge so MIL will read it when she's around next???

I'm having kind of a similar prob atm with MIL being at the birth...she hasn't said anything but she's the type of person who would just "assume" she could be. I'm waiting for the opportunity to let her know she's not coming in, if we just didn't tell them till after the birth we would never be forgiven! Someone suggested to write my birth plan out in front of her!

I'm trying to just sweep it under the carpet and hope she doesn't turn up, if she does then DP can do the honors