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Forum LockedWhen did you start wanting your second?

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mummyofprinces View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mummyofprinces Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 September 2010 at 8:16am
Just a note, if you are going back to the same job (unless they have changed this) you only have to be back at work 6 months for subsequent pregnancies for the full mat leave to kick in


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Richie View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Richie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 September 2010 at 8:34am
Really? I'd read that you are only eligible for the 3 months maternity leave after 6 months but you have to be back for a full year to be eligible for the 52wks again.... ?? And I'd want to take the full year off again
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mrs_B Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 September 2010 at 8:40am
Well DS is 16mths and I'm still undecided if I even want another child. I'm certainly not clucky and the idea of having a baby again makes me shudder but are thinking if we are going to have another it should be now or never.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote T_Rex Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 September 2010 at 8:06pm
Originally posted by melnel melnel wrote:

Just a note, if you are going back to the same job (unless they have changed this) you only have to be back at work 6 months for subsequent pregnancies for the full mat leave to kick in


Really? I thought it was a year to get a year off and 6 months to get 6 months off. Will have to do some reading...

NOT that I will be changing my mind till this little ratbag I already have sleeps a bit better anyway

ETA. So I did that reading, and sadly it has changed from what Mel said. You have to be working an average of 10 hours per week AND at least 1 hour per week or 40 hours per month for the 12 months preceding due date to get the 52 weeks extended leave. So even if you work 40 hours/week for six months (so an average of 20 hours/week for the preceding 12 months), if you did nothing for any of the last 6 months of your maternity leave you don't qualify. I ran it through the calculator to check I was reading it right and I'm pretty sure that I am. So 12 months back at work it is

Edited by T_Rex
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lizze Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 September 2010 at 12:44pm
i wanted another one when DS was 1 week old... DP and I could have quite happily ttc again (but we knew it was a silly idea)

DS stopped sleeping through at 6 months when he started on solids, and now the older he gets the less and less I want to try for another one.
Partly because I'm so exhausted (and every night when I'm up for hours trying to sooth him DP says 'ones enough') but also partly because I'm loving spending time with DS, and don't want to be thinking about someone else just yet :)

When he turned 8 months I said 'maybe we should have a small age gap for his sake so he has someone to play with' so now its more about him :)

Edited by Lizze

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mum2ET Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 September 2010 at 1:58pm

With #1 I didn't feel clucky again until she was around 20 months (which really surprised me). With #2 I wanted another almost staight away (but have decided at the moment no more kids).

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Ella (5) and Tom (2)
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote kiwisj Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 September 2010 at 5:00pm
I was thinking about #2 before C came home from hospital so within the first two weeks. I would have started trying again as soon as physically possible but DH was adamant we wait a bit longer. We have no family here so we agreed to get some home help before TTC #2. We hired M and then got UTD the following month when C was 13 months old I'm so glad we waited, my MS was worse and lasted even longer this time round and we were worried about having another premmie so it's been great having another pair of hands to help out and do the housework.

I do sometimes wish we'd done it sooner because C started crawling at 11.5 months and then walking at 13 months ... I could have gone through the 5 months of MS while C was sitting in one place on the floor being entertained by musical instruments and a mirror rather than chasing him round the blimmin playground if we'd started trying 6 months earlier!! Hindsight eh
SJ
Callum - Dec 2008
Daniel - Oct 2010
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote RedHeadDuck Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 September 2010 at 5:20pm
I was talking about "next time" with my midwife before we even left hospital with DS1

But we won't be trying for #2 until about March 2012, cos DH's best friend is getting married in the North Island then, so I don't wanna be pregnant for that (we're gonna road trip up and make a holiday from it)
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Babykatnz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 September 2010 at 10:02pm
After #1 I swore never again. Traumatic delivery and horrid recovery... ass of a 'baby daddy' and I made sure i wasnt having any more (went back on Depo at 6 week sign off from mw lol!)

Thennnn I met DP... and he scared the snot out of me by saying he wanted kids, and soon!

When we finally had DD, the delivery was SO different to DS, and I was so thrilled to meet my little baby, that I remember saying to DP later that day that I could do this again! It took til AF came back at 4.5 months to make him come around to having another one, BFing a non-issue as it never really panned out for us, I'd had to pull the plug on it that month, AF showed up within the week!
Brandon - 05/12/2003


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Harley View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Harley Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 29 September 2010 at 10:56am

I got clucky as soon as I had to pack away DD's newborn clothes!!

But my Dr suggested 18 months to recover before trying. The trickiest part will be convincing DH to have number 3 - that one might have to be an 'accident'

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lizze Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 29 September 2010 at 11:07am
lol... we decided to only have two, but i have already warned DP I might need a midlife crisis baby #3 5 years later... that too may be an accident

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote caliandjack Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 29 September 2010 at 11:38am

Originally posted by nzlisajo nzlisajo wrote:

Really? I'd read that you are only eligible for the 3 months maternity leave after 6 months but you have to be back for a full year to be eligible for the 52wks again.... ?? And I'd want to take the full year off again


This is correct, your entitled to the 14 weeks PPL with 6 months of service, to qualify for the additional 38 weeks you need to have 12.


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Angel June 2012
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CrazyCass View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote CrazyCass Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 29 September 2010 at 11:54am
You can talk to your employer, we had a girl come back from maternity leave preggo, she got the full 12months off again - they just called it a leave of absence

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