How to help someone out???

supermarket vouchers?
check if she's getting everything she's entitled to from WINZ/Ministry of Health and if she needs to talk with the SW (there will be one in outpatients), go with her to support her?
being in contact regularly to let her know you haven't forgotten her and check if there is anything she needs help with?'
shave your head to fundraise for the Leukaemia Foundation (though that won't help her directly)

Dunno - it's so hard being so powerless. We have a friend whose 2 year old has cancer and we just didn't have a clue what to do.

When we were in Starship with Daniel, the things we appreciated most were the regular calls, texts and emails. HOWEVER, all our physical and financial needs were met unlike your friend, from the sounds of it.

Meals are always handy - even when food money isn't the issue, sometimes a cooked meal can be a Godsend coz the last thing you feel like doing is cooking.

Supermarket vouchers too like Fliss suggested. And definitely talk to her about what support she's getting, a friend of mine has a daughter with cancer and they have access to travel subsidies, meal vouchers when they are in hospital etc. thru the DHB and Child Cancer.

And I definitely agree with Fliss about the calls, texts etc. - having a sick child can be really isolating and scary and it's nice just to know that people are thinking of you.

Everyone has had some great suggestions but I am with RoSee regarding making meals and popping them in the freezer for her. That way she doesn't have to think about having to cook at night. Maybe also something like savoury muffins for the freezer so she can have those for lunch or a snack and easy enough to chuck in her bag for days when they are at the hospital.

She should be getting help from child cancer foundation for petrol vouchers and groceries etc. and help with bills. Get her to speak to the social worker on the ward at starship to make sure she is getting everything she should be from WINZ. And as she is regularly attending hospital she should be getting mileage reimbursed through the travel assistance scheme.

The easiest way for her to find out about all this is to ask one of the nurses on the day ward at starship to talk to child cancer and social worker for her.

I am baffled as we get so much assistance (food, petrol, travel, phone cards, help with bills...). And child Cancer came to us, we didn't need to approach them, but they did ask us if we wanted the input first. And CCF can help with the extra things, like maybe helping get her car fixed. Heck, they even sent me out for a hair cut and colour after 6 weeks of being in hospital with Greer!!

But from you personally, meals are fantastic, especially frozen ones. If she has a prepaid mobile, then phone cards. Or just buy her a few bags of groceries (sometimes we come home and theres some at the back door randomly, so helpful). Maybe if she wants you to, you could go with her to a hospital visit cos it is really hard to leave your child while you go toilet or get food etc.

i agree, the hospital social worker will help her & arrange forms. She needs to talk to them for support also.

I think making a few meals is a great idea & maybe some friends can do housework for her also. Sometimes just the little things can make a big difference.

involving some of the other social services such as IOSIS etc to help her source some extra help would be good - esp if she wants to leave it to someone else - as I can completely understand when she is focussing on her daughter.

they will step in and assist - social work for her and with her.

also some of the church based groups might step in to assist or also "social work" - she doesnt have to be involved just ask for help....

i hope her daughter gets thru this ok.