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lizzle
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Topic: contesting the will Posted: 16 October 2007 at 9:15pm |
Turns out my cousins are contesting the will of my grandfather. i am really upset by it, and not just cause i don't get any money yet. i feel like this was my grandfather's money - his wishes, why shouldn't he be able to leave his money to who he likes. he put a LOT of money into an account and left it to all us grand-kids, ands the main estate was divided up - they are claiming a share of this - as their parents are dead and therefore didn't get a piece of this part. they call it "failure to adequately provide" "they" I might add are 40, 38, 32, 26 and 25 - so are old enough to "provide" for themselves.
anyway just wondering, is it just me who finds expecting an inheritance weird? and does anyone else not agree with contesting a will?
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mummy_becks
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Posted: 16 October 2007 at 9:19pm |
I don't think I could contest a will unless I was left out for a silly reason (had a fight with the relative and then they change their will that day and die the next).
I don't that is weird to expect an inheritance, I was so shocked when I received one from my great uncle I had never even met from England.
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jaz
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Posted: 16 October 2007 at 9:58pm |
I am very anti when it comes to contesting wills and believe you should respect the wishes of the deceased. If they cut someone out of their will they must've had good reasons for it. I don't expect an inheritance and always encouraged my parents to enjoy (spend) their money rather than hang on to it and leave it to us. Mum's lawyer didn't word things as she wished when he prepared her will and the only way we could've made it happen was to contest her will, which we all chose not to do on principal. So I guess for me contesting the will is a bigger evil than honoring a loved ones dying wishes (if that makes sense).
When I prepared my will my lawyer made some good suggestions. For example, leave your estate to be divided evenly between all your biological children rather than naming them, then if you have another child you don't have to change your will or risk leaving one out.
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Mama2two
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Posted: 16 October 2007 at 11:28pm |
I personally think that is really low. It always amazes me how money hungry people can get when someone dies. Like vultures!!! As a rule I agree that you wouldn't go against the wishes of that person.
Not the case when my mother died though. We had to contest her will. Long story but basically she hadn't been well (mentally after a car accident with severe head injuries) for a long time and her sisters had convinced her to write us (her children) out of her will, and leave all her assets to their children. This was changed less than a month before she died!
Unfortunately for them we were underage (15 & 17) and there is a law in NZ that states in these situations the estate will go to provide for the children. Her sisters felt this was unfair and that they were entitled to a slice of the pie (so to speak). They were told by their lawyer that there was no way they would win if it went to court. Anyway, they still managed to drag it out for 7 years which meant by the time it got to the high court the legal fees were huge. My brother and I were awarded half each of the estate, but of course the legal fees had to be taken out of that.
We then had to take them to court to find out what had happened to her ashes and if there was even a grave! It got very messy and really opened my eyes even at that age to how nasty families can be when there is an inheritance involved!
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james
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Posted: 17 October 2007 at 7:59am |
my aunty stole over 28 thousand dollers out of my grans account the day before she died told us there was only 7 grand in there and only gave it back when threaed with jail time and she did it because her pernets owed her money lol some people are just plain evil. big hug lizzle
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aimeejoy
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Posted: 17 October 2007 at 8:27am |
That is terrible Liz (and OMG Mum2Sam!). In a normal situation I do not agree with contesting a will, like you say its honouring that persons wishes. Things like that just make me feel so mad, I cant imagine what it must be like to have it actually happening. Hope it gets sorted out soon - and not in their favour.
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lizzle
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Posted: 17 October 2007 at 8:27am |
i am hating seeing how money is making everyone so greedy and horrible
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fattartsrock
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Posted: 17 October 2007 at 8:41am |
OMG Mum2sam and Lizzle!!! I think it is bloody awful, situations like that.
I personally don't expect any inheritance (except, i guess I will get landed with the debts, lol) from my mother and never have done, and I think its pretty bad when there are expectations of being "set up for life" or whatever. I don't think you should have to live a meagre life so you can make your children wealthy when you die. Don't you give them enuff already??!!
Money is the root of all eveil when it comes to wills etc. I think you shuld respect the wishes of the deceased, except in the circumstances like mum2sam.
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daikini
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Posted: 17 October 2007 at 9:10am |
 Liz and Mum2Sam! That's such a tough situation you both are/were in! Mum2Sam, it sounds to me like you handled it well with dignity. Liz, I hope things get resolved soon... and in my opinion (which is worth stuff all  ) your cousins are just being greedy.
I know the basics of my parents wills... and I know (as one of the executors of the estate) that my sister and brother will get more financially than I will. I am fine with that, as I understand the reasoning - I am 10 and 12 years older than them, and am supporting myself... K is (currently) 16, S is (currently) 14, they will need that help more than I do. S will probably never live a "normal" life (he's special needs) and my parents and I have discussed what is to happen with him if something should happen to both Mum and Dad at the same time/close together. Most of S's share will be held in trust (and I will be one of the trustees) and used to make sure he is looked after for the rest of his life.
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Tiff
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Posted: 17 October 2007 at 9:40am |
Some people are truly out for themselves and whats worse is that they often convince themselves that they deserve it and are doing the right thing!!!
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caliandjack
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Posted: 17 October 2007 at 9:47am |
Under British Law, surviving children can claim part of the estate, not sure if its the same in NZ.
I do worry about this, as my mother left everything to my father as the surviving partner, which is fine.
Now my father has a new partner, and I don't want to see the wealth that was created between my mother and father over 40 years going to this new person.
I know I would feel very disapointed if my father left everything to his new partner, and nothing to my brother and me and the grand children. I would contest the will if this came about.
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lizzle
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Posted: 17 October 2007 at 11:39am |
my dad is in a similar situation Fleury and a few months ago, we all sat down and discussed their wqill. If Dad dies, everything goes to my step-mother BUT, it will actually be put in trust under 1/2 (me and 1/2 my s-sisters. If smum remarries, she has to "buy me out". and vice versa if she dies first. they explained this in more detail and showed us documents, so all of us are pretty happy about it.
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Helen21
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Posted: 17 October 2007 at 3:19pm |
I've always believed in respecting the wishes of the departed but after reading some of the stuff above I couldn't believe how unfair some people can be when it comes down to money so now I'm thinking it's different in every case. Extended family sticking their nose in where it's not wanted is just plain rude and disrespectful!
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emz
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Posted: 17 October 2007 at 4:57pm |
I'll play devils advocate here and try and get my head around this. These are your cousins who are contesting right? In a lot of cases where estates are split among the deceased's children, if they too are dead the grandchildren get it, so I don't see a problem with it. I would kind of think it a bit rude that my whole side of the family got left out of the will because my parents unfortunately passed before the matriach or patriach did. In our family, we had the same thing happen (where an aunty had died before the grandmother) and her share was given to her children. So I don't really see a problem with it.
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lizzle
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Posted: 17 October 2007 at 5:48pm |
thanks for your opinion emz. i'm really trying to work out why they are contesting, as I believe that granddad had the right to do with his money what ever he wanted. Apparently grandad specifically did not want to give my cousins a share of the estate along with my uncle and dad as he thought this would be unfair as me and my uncle's kids wouldn't get the same (if any of my cousins think i will see a cent of my father's inheritance - well they don't know him!)
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busymum
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Posted: 17 October 2007 at 7:52pm |
We're going through an inheritance split at the moment. Our family is pretty amicable but there have still been a few moments. The person who died was my dad's mum (she left 3 sons and heaps of grandkids) and yet my mum can hardly contain herself to not go and clear out half the house?  It makes me a bit sick actually, she seems to insensitive to anyone else's feelings and just wants the stuff.
My grandmother lived on the basis that she wanted to see her kids enjoy their inheritance while she was still alive. So she was very generous with Christmas gifts etc. When I got married I was given $1,000 towards furnishing my home (bedroom/lounge suite, she said) and I later presumed that was my inheritance. I'm 2nd generation so I wasn't expecting anything else. As it turns out, she left another $1,000 to all the grandkids (each) and the rest is to be divvied up in the 1st generation (her sons). I like that, and I think it's fair.
I wouldn't have contested a grandparent's Will but (not that I think this would happen) if I was left out of my own parent's will, at whatever age, I would consider it. I don't think I would contest it but I would certainly think it very unfair.
On the other hand, I don't expect my parents to scrimp so that they will have an inheritance left over. (But in answer to Annie's question, no my parents hardly give me anything except hand-me-down kids clothes with bung elastic.  ) I won't be living a half-pint life so that my kids will have an inheritance some day, but I will definitely be living out of debt so that I will leave something behind for them.
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