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kiwisj
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Topic: TTC after having a prem baby... Posted: 29 July 2009 at 2:11pm |
I'm putting this in the General section so hopefully more people read it and can share their thoughts
I don't really know what I am asking here (there isn't really a question!), but now that C is getting a bit bigger and daily life is a lot easier I have started thinking about "number 2."
If he hadn't been early I would have liked to start TTC when he was between 6-9 months old which would have been soon. The thing is, I feel like I am ready to start TTC but I am worried that we will have another prem baby and so the age gap will be less PLUS I am terrified of being on bedrest with a baby to look after and then possibly another stint in the NICU. And also what if the next baby isn't as strong as C - I know we were extremely lucky to have few problems and spend such a short time in the NICU considering he was only 32 weeks.
We don't know why my waters broke so early so no idea whether it might happen again or whether it was a once off. I know I need to go have a chat with my ob/gyn about this but I feel like he is just going to say, "we don't know what will happen"
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SJ
Callum - Dec 2008
Daniel - Oct 2010
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BeLoved
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Posted: 29 July 2009 at 3:14pm |
I too am thinking of TTC number 2 but have been told too hold off until DD is 18 months old as I had gestational diabetes for no apparent reason except possibly genetics and therefore can only control it with insulin injections or other drugs not diet. The specialists I ended up having to deal with said that 18 months is the preferred amount of time to let your body fully recover from the general strains of pregnancy and also the extra strain of the diabetes.
I have also read a lot about pregnancy's affect on the body and most say 18 months is the preferred amount of time to wait. This worries me for one reason and that is it took a year of TTC to fall pregnant and what if it takes that long again after waiting 18 months (I will be 31 when we TTC no. 2) but then what if we decided to TTC now and I fell pregnant straight away & something went wrong with the baby or myself. I guess its a lot of "what ifs?" but I think I would rather know I did what was advised and then will not be thinking "I should have listened to the professionals advice" So maybe see if you can get a few different professional opinions and then choose the one you like best & follow their advice LOL! BTW the 3 different professionals I have spoken too have all told me the same thing dam it!!!
edited to add: Oh also should add I started having contractions at 28 weeks and was hospitalised for awhile until all seem to come right so this makes me nervous as well that that might happen again with now having a baby to look after.
Edited by HeidisMum
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kiwisj
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Posted: 29 July 2009 at 3:31pm |
Thanks HeidisMum. You're right about getting professional opinions first. I have talked to my Health Visitor (a midwife and nurse and all-round sensible lady lol) and her opinion was to wait till early next year at least, but she said that's her opinion for Mums that have full term babies as well, she thinks you should give your body a year to recover.
We got pg 2nd month trying with C so I am worried that if we wait 18 months or 2yrs and then it DOESN'T happen that quickly then I will be gutted. But I guess that's what happens when you have kids - you lose any control over your life plans
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SJ
Callum - Dec 2008
Daniel - Oct 2010
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kiwisj
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Posted: 03 August 2009 at 12:24pm |
*bump*
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SJ
Callum - Dec 2008
Daniel - Oct 2010
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KH25
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Posted: 03 August 2009 at 2:54pm |
I really struggled with making a decision on when to TTC with #2 after having Ashleigh at 26wks. It became even harder when we moved away from all our friends and family so if we did have another prem, it would be extremely hard without the support.
So then we made the decision based on other things happening in our lives (hubby's work and building a new house etc) and we started TTC so there would be roughly a 3 yr age gap or just over. As you can tell from my signature things haven't gone to plan at all and now I am really gutted we didn't start trying earlier. There are always pros and cons to all age gaps between children with different ages working for different people though. A mum that was in NICU with us had her son at 28 wks and her next oldest was only 8 months old when the youngest was born!!
As for having another prem - there was no reason found for having Ashleigh so early and I have seen a specialist about it before TTC this time. He thinks it was just a random thing that happened and the only issues that will be closely monitored is a blood clotting disorder that I have. But I'm still terrified of it happening again and think how incredibly hard it would be when you have another child to look after!
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Kelly, mum to DD, 19Jun06 (26wks 1lb15oz) DS1, 24Oct10 (32wks 4lb11oz) and DS2, 31Dec11 (32wks, 4lb11)
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yummymummy
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Posted: 03 August 2009 at 10:01pm |
Gina was born at 36wk gest after my waters broke. She did great and never had to go to NICU. We were home after a week in hospital.
We had always wanted a small gap between our babies so I had a chat to my GP & midwife and there didn't seem to be anything to worry about. We started TTC as soon as I stopped b'feeding and we got preggers in the 1st month.
Emma was born at 32wk gest after contractions started suddenly. She spent 4 wks in NICU and she has done really well - thankfully. We never did find why labour started early.
Having had 2 prems, both my GP and midwife agree there is something causing it but who knows? It has def put me off having any more babies as I can not face the thought of having another prem or even worse - losing a baby. Before Emma was born, we had talked about having more then 2 kids but not any more.
Don't want this to sound like doom & gloom. I am grateful I have 2 beautiful halthy kids and feel blessed. Good luck!
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Tastic
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Posted: 04 August 2009 at 11:44pm |
I had aidan at 26 weeks and it turned out I had an infection which is what made him arrive so early
TTC number 3 in our case was a BIG decision as not only the 'what if they are prem' but the extra monitoring etc was a little off putting! even if this baby arrives early *touch wood it doesnt* there will be almost 3 years difference between
I think you should talk to your doctor about your concerns and see what he/she say?
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kiwisj
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Posted: 05 August 2009 at 12:48pm |
Thanks for sharing your stories guys. Like I say, I'm not sure what I want to hear really but it's nice to know I'm not the only one who's had to think about this IYKWIM. DH isn't ready to start trying yet anyway (he'd prefer a bigger gap) so I think later in the year I will go have a chat with my ob/gyn and see what he says.
Thanks again.
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SJ
Callum - Dec 2008
Daniel - Oct 2010
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