Tricky situation - what would you do?

My parents are celebrating 25 years married in February (about 6 weeks from now) and I thought it would be really cool to send them away for a long weekend, considering that they don't get away much - Dad has been on the sickness benefit (stress) for the last 2 years and they still have 6 dependent kids at home, aged 4 up to 16.

So I've rallied around some of their friends, set a budget of $900 and have raised $535 so far, so they can go away for a marriage enrichment conference and stay in a hotel for 3 nights as well, in April - so they'll have about 8 weeks to make their arrangements and finalise bookings between their anniversary (when they will find out) and the conference date. My plan is to present them with a "gift certificate" for their anniversary for an all expenses paid weekend away etc, from us and their friends (list names of friends who have contributed).

So.... that's all the background (sorry so waffly) and then today I get an email from Dad's mum, who is in on the secret, to let me know that someone has anonymously sent Mum and Dad a sizeable cheque for them to treat themselves to a holiday sometime next year. Sounds like they got it for Christmas - just in the last couple of days anyway. And they are thinking about going for a cruise to Western Samoa at the end of March because the prices are cheaper then. It will be Mum's first time out of the country.

What should I do? Discourage the trip? Postpone the conference one for a conference later in the year? Hint that they'll be going away in April already? If they are booking a cruise it will presumably be booked before their anniversary date on 6 Feb?

This was not a complication I expected and I really don't know what to do!

Yes I was a little annoyed..... if it was someone I have emailed they could have used a bit of sense with timing. Give it to them after 6th Feb!!! *sighs*

I'm sure your Mum & Dad would appreciate the money that you have collected as a contribution to the holiday that they are taking in Samoa. Imagine what a great time they would have if they had that extra cash for spending money. It sounds like your parents are really generous people, so that extra cash could make it a holiday to remember.

Well here's the link to what I'm thinking of. I was hoping that I could still send them to a marriage conference because they've been having a real tough time this year Decisions, decisions.... how much does a cruise like that cost anyway? $1500-$2000?

Wherever I "send" them (lol) will need to be with the revised agreement of all the donors, but it does need to be out of town or Mum won't be able to help herself but ring or pop in at home to check everything's okay! That's not a break LOL!

I'm thinking that I might have to tell them that I'm planning to send them away (ie out of town) for a holiday in April... and that'll make them hesitate about going in March as well.

I do think that an overseas cruise is a once in a ifetime thing. It would be nice if there was someway you could have them do both, rather than miss out on the cruise.

Funny Deb cause you got married on my grandparents' bday!

And Miss, I agree - I want them to go on both but I just can't see it working out if they are planned within a month of each other.

Edited by busymum