favouritism

taine is at the absolutely adorable stage. After being sick for a few weeks he is back to usual self and really happy and smiley to anyone. he's just met his grandparents who have gone gaga ove rhim.

Jake is 2....and sometimes it honeslt feels like he has been abducted by aliens and replaced with a n evil child who yells "no" and sprints away from me when i try to get him to do anything. he threw a can of spaghetti at me this morning.

BUT the problem i am having are with the in-laws (again!!)

For Jake's birthday, MIL eventually saud she'd get him clothes. Xmas eve she left a bag from farners here. she lives in Aus, so obviously she bought them when she got back to nz. Anyway, i opened the bag, one pair of shorts for Jake, two tops and a pair of shorts, a pair of leggings and some shoes for taine. Lovely birthday present for jake huh!!

Gets worse. jake got nothing from them for xmas. Now, if they don't want to buy anything, fair enough, but we had asked them to buy a toy in Aus for US to give to taine. they decided they would give it to him instead (annoyed me, but thats another story)....fine, but once again, no present for jake.

Now of course Jake hasn't noticed, but i'm really concerned that this is going to continue. It also kinda says to me "we only buy presents for "good" kids" (Jake has seriously been soooo naughty!), which of cousrsem will be Taine next year. So he'll get nothing then? I've talked to Lewis but because we are argueing with his sister, he doesn't want to fight with any other family members, but he did say that he would mention something if it was appropriate.

Lewis' Nana is blantant with her preference for Taine. My heart aches for poor jake.

Just my 2 cents but = does Jake have the same Dad or is this a blended family? What went on back when Jake was born etc to make them like this?
I think it needs sorted out once and for all cause playing favourites will not help down the track at all....Lewis or yourself do need to say something - hey you are fighting with his sister take them all down at once?
Dont let this continue...its not healthy for the boys to be entrenched in this - nor for the family to reinforce sibling rivalry!

That is absolutely horrific! I can't beleive that grandparents could be that cruel. I think the fact that his parents are showing such obvious favouritism is reason enough to have a word- appropriate or not.

DHs parents favour his sisters kids over Charlotte- its horrible. Luckily we live on the other side of the world but when we move back they won't be seeing much of her (or the second one). Kids are pretty intuitive and pick up on that kind of thing pretty quickly.

Liz I would deff say something that is just really not on I totally understand the 2 year old thing I am finding Alan really tough at the momnet, but that is no reason for the grandparent's to treat the boy's differnt. My Hubby's grandmother is like that with her children as well as her Grandchildren needless to say she never even bother's to see our kid's we live aroung the couner she has never meet Mikey. I think it is up to Hubby to put them straight if they want to buy's for Taine and not Jake then they should not bother for either. It won't be long to Jake does notice ant that is so not fair. for Jake and Mummy. Oh and I have to say both your boy's are totally beautiful.

That is terrible!
Isn't it ridiculous how quickly the oldies forget how 'wonderful' age 2 can be? We're finding it the absolute best and worst with Ella.
I really have no advice, only lots of sympathy. I hope you get a break from in law drama soon (they sound great )
Big hugs to you and your beautiful boys.

I would say something for sure. Hubby and his brothers were always shoved in to a different room when they went to there paternal grandmothers house as she only likes girls!! And his parents always put up with it. She has never had anything to do with our boys in fact she has never met Jayden and he is now five. When I had Abigail I made it very clear that if she didn't have anything to do with the boys she didn't have anything to do with Abby. She has never seen her to this day.

The way I figure it , it is her loss as my kids don't need the negativity of competing against each other for her affections and they are better off without her.

Stick to your guns it isn't right to treat them differently.

OMG....how rude!!

Poor Jake.....I would say some thing Liz, I wont let it carry on.....Other wise they will think it is exceptable behaviour......Arrggg

My MIL told me that she is only spoiling Zaara because she is the first and that my next wont get sooo much pressies and gifts. I told her then you should stop buying Zaara pressies too...because I want both (or how ever many) my kids treated exactly the same way. If you cant manage that then...stop now!!

May be you could keep one pair of shorts for Taine and give the rest back to her?? Hehe hah ah...dont mind me...I have an mind!

Aw Liz! Jake is my favorite!!! (But that's down to me having only met Taine when he was all little and boring - he was cute though.)

I'm still planning on coming. Maybe I could come when the in-laws around so they can see Hannah in action... Jake wouldn't appear half as bad when there is another nasty 2 year old running around.

Gosh the kitchen thing would send me up the wall.

Emma my uncle always called me his "favourite oldest niece" etc, so we all were his favourites. Maybe your dad could do something like that with Maya: "my favourite oldest granddaughter" (that's a guess) or "my favourite 3yo granddaughter" etc. You probably don't really want him to stop altogether because Maya probably already feels a bit replaced/dethroned as it is.