Bad day

Sorry in advance for rambling just need to offload...

Started well with DH getting girls up and going up town by myself for a few hours. Then DH goes out with Hannah to do a few jobs and MIL and FIL turn up with Hannah. Young SIL (20) has lost it apparently and flown off the handle at everyone threatening suicide etc cos they have asked her to move out (long story but shes been staying there for a while since last funeral and hasnt got a job, not sure what she wants to do) and go live in one of their vacant flats. Anyway, DH has taken her off for a drive. ILs leave and I dont hear from DH for about an hour. Get a text saying they are on there way up to Hawkes Bay to find a cousellor or something. I text saying they arent likely to see anyone on a Saturday and anyway I had been led to believe she was just being a drama queen. He returns a few hours later - turns out she has tried to do it a few times before and has thought about it since she was a kid. She just wants to be alone at the moment and we are pretty sure she will be ok - she wants to get better and has a plan to go see someone monday morning. She has an awful relationship with her dad,and I can totally see why, he is really rough on her and I know a lot went on when she was younger and they just clash terribly.

I feel so guilty cos if I hadnt text they would prob have ended up at emergency dept and possibly seen someone, tho I doubt they would have admitted her cos she isnt in immediate danger. I'm guessing she would have been sent away until Monday, but still feel awful cos FIL had said she was just threatening to get things her own way, and I was grumpy cos DH had just gone off without saying anything. From what I gather she wasnt actually threatening to do anything now, just trying to tell her mum what was going on in her head and then MIL freaked out and it all got blown up. Hopefully its just got the ball rolling for her to get some help.

DHs family is pretty messed up at the moment (actually has been for a while). The little SIL has threatened suicide before as well but may finally have her sh*t sorted. BIL (24) was on the phone last week cos he is having MAJOR money probs and was thinking of asking doc for antidepressants. MIL cant cope with anything like this and FIL is useless - told me today he doesnt care what happens and that they have stupid kids. I wonder why? And DH gets asked to help all the time (which I resent) cos he parents dont want to, and he feels he needs to fix everyone elses problems, and he is starting to get burnt out from it all.

Ah well, tomorrow is another day... Thank you for reading if you still are! Sorry its so long.

See why I need my milky bar?!

Hugs Aimee! What a stressful situation

aww big hugs hun, palmy would be closer ......

mummy_becks wrote: OMG Aimee what a handful. I know it sounds strange but if your SIL was really going to top herself she wouldn't be telling anyone. I know from experience with family that if they say they are going to do it, it is a cry for attention and they need help. They don't want to do it, it is their way of asking for help. If people really want to do it they don't say anything - well my friend didn't acted like everything was normal and went out to town with his mates and then when they came home they all left he told his GF to go to her place and once they had all gone he did it. Him going out with them all was him saying goodbye. Can your DH bring her over to Palmy hospital so they can see her here?? Could be worth it considering what she has been saying.

thats usual, most of the time, not all though, my friends boyfriend used to always tell us he was unhappy and was going to kill himself, to the point where we just didnt take any notice anymore...and then one day , he gassed himself in her car
(sorry about your friend though, thats really sad)

I think people that commit suicide must get to a point where they dont care about anything anymore, if you can still think "sh*t, i do feel bad for the person who finds me" you have a chance, its those who really dont care , that are already gone .

and aimee, i dont think you have any reason to feel guilty, you didn't cause her to feel this way

She has text me this morning so thats good, was a bit worried about her overnight. Bloody MIL and FIL have taken there phone off the hook, cos I tried to ring and let me know she is ok today

Was thinking about it last night, and i really do think she was just trying to tell her mum and get help, but MIL just cannot cope with anything like that and got a bit carried away. Then SIL being how she is, wanted to talk to someone NOW, even tho it was Saturday arvo. I stopped feeling guilty too cos we gave her three options of people to talk to last night (Lifeline, church pastor, and a counsellor we know) but she said no thanks to all. So I feel we did everything we could, and its up to her now.

Thanks for the thoughts as well. Its not really something I can moan to the DH about.

Oooh ouch - what a horrible time for you both.  Like others have said, don't feel guilty as she would have been briefly triaged and most likely referred to another service, but not an emergency one, so she'd have had to wait till next week anyway.  My gosh you must just want to slap your IL's though.  Far out.