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Leahsmummy 
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Joined: 13 January 2008
Location: Palmerston North
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 Topic: Jealous
Posted: 20 January 2010 at 7:57pm |
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I had a mc at 8weeks 3days and i was feeling pretty good about it a week later, but now that our scan date is coming up and people around me getting pregnant and my cousin who was due the same day as me im feeling really sad about it and REALLY jealous!!!
Please tell me this is normal because im feeling like a right bitch about it!!! Im even jealous of my BIL and his partner starting IVF next month even thou they have been trying for 2 1/2yrs!!!
I think im feeling extra jealous because we arent trying straight away (im waiting for a op) so we are waiting till after that....
So theres not really much to this post I think i just needed to vent!!!!
Thanks for reading...
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emz
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Joined: 25 November 2006
Location: Christchurch
Points: 5321
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Posted: 20 January 2010 at 8:42pm |
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Hugs! Sorry haven't been there, but from seeing friends go through it, I would think its completely OK to feel that way. It's no reflection on you, just what you have been through.
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hannibal
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Joined: 04 December 2008
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Posted: 20 January 2010 at 8:53pm |
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Hugs too! Remember you all have a very special little girl already and a dream. You aren't a right B and it would only be natural to feel gutted.
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cuppatea
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Joined: 05 February 2007
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Posted: 20 January 2010 at 9:06pm |
Yep totally normal, although not nice. My sil was pregnant whilst I had a m/c and I even wished she would lose her baby so she would know what it felt like  Not a nice thing to wish and I hated myself for thinking that way, but it is normal and it does pass (thankfully nothing happened to her baby cos I would have felt even worse if it had). Even now I do feel quite jealous of women that get to have children without experiencing a loss, even though I have two gorgeous little boys of my own. Emotions, so annoying.
I hope you op goes well and wish you lots of luck with TTC and fingers crossed that you never have to experience another loss.
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Emmi_
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Joined: 14 May 2009
Location: Wellington
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Posted: 21 January 2010 at 9:16am |
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Oh hun, Im so sorry for your loss.
Yep, totally normal (and as cuppatea says not nice!), but you have to do what you have to do to get through it. You do have to greive for your bubba youve lost. I know I was fine for the first month after my MC, sad but fine, but then completly lost it, was crying and couldnt stop, was withdrawn and angry and sad. Took me a while to get through it. Talking to someone (preferably who has been there but otherwise someone understanding and who isnt going to have you committed) really helps, I loved this thread as it showed I wasnt alone, no matter how alone I was.
If you ever want to talk, feel free to PM me
I too waited 2 cycles as had to have a knee op, and I was PG nearly 4 weeks after my op, so I hope you have the same luck
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My3Sons
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Posted: 21 January 2010 at 10:23am |
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ElfsMum
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Posted: 21 January 2010 at 1:03pm |
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i agree with the others ..esp cuppatea.. why do they get to have babies without mc's..why me..and i was really angry for a while and jealous for ages.. totally normal..though it sucks
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Mum to two amazing boys!
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lostAmber
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Joined: 04 November 2009
Location: Hamilton
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Posted: 21 January 2010 at 6:02pm |
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Yep, totally normal. I get angry, upset, JEALOUS, and sometimes think bad things too. My SIL is in her 3rd trimester now and I can't even bring myself to talk to her let alone see her. I don't want anything to do with her, even think that she shouldn't have been able to conceive another because she sucks as a mum- how evil is that! Also another one who had to wait 2 cycles before ttc again because I had complications- was still bleeding 4 wks post final expulsion and then went on to develop a cyst. It does get better with time though, have hope.
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Leahsmummy
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Joined: 13 January 2008
Location: Palmerston North
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Posted: 21 January 2010 at 7:17pm |
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Thanks guys it really helps knowing that im not bad!!! And yes I have had bad throughts about people losing there babys, my SIL was 4 weeks behind me and when I had my mc she was bleeding and I was kinda glad that she might be going though it to, but no she didnt mc!!!
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mummyofprinces
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Joined: 10 February 2008
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Posted: 21 January 2010 at 10:25pm |
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OMG so normal.. sometimes I still feel like that. Much like what cuppatea said, my bestie is pg with her first and I am soo jealous that she didnt have a mc. How horrible is that!!!
I am happy for her, just not fair.
You never forget your angels.
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Jacindarella
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Joined: 22 November 2009
Location: Auckland
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Posted: 22 January 2010 at 7:55pm |
Oh yep! It's normal!
My SIL and I were pregnant at the same time and I still can't see or speak to her 4.5 weeks later... and I can't see myself wanting to anytime soon!
I'm sorry for your loss.
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Brilee
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Location: Manukau
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Posted: 02 February 2010 at 2:22pm |
So normal!!
I feel like a right bitch atm, we had a molar pregnancy last may had a d&c and have been under observation since then I have only just been given the all clear and we are now trying again, Last year I introduced my friend to my brother in law now they are engaged and getting married end of year i was talking to her the other day and she told me they are trying for a baby and do I want to "race" this put me into a complete tiz and I have to say I have not been happy with her since I think if they get pregnant before me It would be hard to handle, I have to tell myself to think nice but gosh golly gosh its HARD!!!!! 
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Jealous
Esp since it had taken 2 years to get pregnant and then to lose the baby. Life can be so unfair sometimes!! Best of luck with TTC again after your op
