What do I do? What do I do?

I think go with your gut instinct. I'd be tempted to take the new job, just so you can relax a bit more. Maybe being de-stressed would even help with the IVF.

what a tough decision....I was thinking maybe staying would be good so you can continue IVF plans and also be eligble for parental leave etc but you need to be stressfress dont you....oh tough choices...toss a coin???? Find a 3rd option???

The only advise I can give which I am sure you do.

Write it down, pros and cons. Real ones not what if's (if you know what I mean)
Best of luck.

 

I have nothing inspirational to offer other than go with your heart - and that if you stick at the old job and do IVF sooner you will be on leave sooner AND your work will have to pay you for it

Is it possible to stay in your current job and kick (not literally, keep your emotions together!) the other person out?

Hmmmm. That doesn't sound too promising does it?

Yea I think you should do that too.

That, my friend, is called "chatting online"


Okay get serious Teresa.
I think you already know what to do. Go grab that new job. It's going to be interesting, a bit kinder on your back (talking about daggers here), and you'll be more relaxed. I know you know how important that is because you've already done this with jobs once before.

Thing is (and you know me, I don't mean to be harsh or unkind) once you do get the IVF thing going, there's no guarantee when you'll be pg by. It's sad, but it's true. There's no way you can stay in your present job waiting for IVF to bail you out of the current situation. Cause then you'll be uptight and you still have to wait for successful IVF.

Now onto the finance issue. This is a toughie. Can you play your cards? ie welllllll I'm considering going for your job Mr NiceMan but I'm currently being paid x and you're only offering z. Can we compromise on y? Step 2. Is there any way you can trim the budget further (and I'm not just teasing about kitchen utensils here) to bridge that IVF gap? I think you're already working off single income though and all your income is going into IVF?

Now what does your gut instinct tell you?

I guess it comes down to what is more important...I'll be honest and say if I was in your position and it sounds like the IVF plans are pretty close....I'd stick it out and go on maternity leave, collect all you can and then (assuming you plan to be SAHM) quit with the glee you are dying to!

Failing that I'd also make a list...

Gee I'm so helpful.

Hi Ginger have you considered going and temping?

1) It's good money(I know thats not big thing for you)
2) You work when you want(Works for IVF fit's your schedule)
3) Don't get caught up in day to day stuff within company's never there long enough
4) You won't get back stabbing and inter office politics
5) New challenges for your skill base regularly
6) Meet lots of new people
7) Possiblity of a temp position going full time into a role you may really enjoy



Edited by BSDH

Hellooo!!!

You're all going to groan loudly when I tell you what I've done ...

Things with the move, and the problem employee have changed dramatically overnight. I had a phone call from my boss last evening and I had a good talk to him about all my concerns (he's a very good boss like that) etc, and yes, I had a very big search of my heart re IVF.

So, I'm going to stay. I am learning to breathe deeply and remember that I do not need to involve myself in stressy things, and the money I earn here will be more use to get us into IVF sooner than a new job would be.

Plus, I don't have to worry about the coming couple of months - I have to give a months leave here, and I have a jury summons for July, with a 4 week trial starting that week! So, if I end up on that, I'll still be getting paid, whereas at the other job I wouldn't - and a few thousand dollars goes a long way towards an IVF cycle!

I hadn't thought of temping BSDH - but, I'm a useless clot and get terribly anxious about new things, new people, and finding my way to new locations ...I'd be a jibbering wreck, good money or not.

Plus you'll all be glad to know that the budget has been well trimmed, and I am being very well beahved working towards IVF, and the paying for the car and saving is going well

Sooo ...watch this space! And thank you all so much for your input - it really helped me to weigh everything up. Hopefully I've done the right thing!

Not groaning at all, I'm glad you've been able to make up your mind about it all It's good you can talk to your boss about things going on, I'm sure that'll help a LOT.

All the best for the trial, with your background do you find that interesting?