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Vanillabean 
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Joined: 17 January 2008
Location: Wellington
Points: 462
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 Topic: problem getting spm sample
Posted: 31 May 2008 at 12:16pm |
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Poor DH is having problems performing under pressure. My GP said that the lab in Wellington doesn't accept sperm samples on Saturdays so we took a day off work to do it so it wouldn't be too stressful. However, this seemed to increase the pressure even more because it made the stakes higher and at the end of our attempts we were left empty handed, so to speak.
I was really disappointed as I really want to get the ball rolling with seeing a specialist but at the same time I felt really bad for DH who was feeling like a bit of a failure. I'm sure that if I had to do the female equivalent on demand that I would not cope well.
Not sure what we can do but try to take the pressure off and try again until it works out.
It would be really reassuring to know if other people have had the same problem but got through it.
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5x mc, Jan 08, June 08, Nov 08, May 09, April 11
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busymum
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Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
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Posted: 31 May 2008 at 1:29pm |
I've never been in your position but do you have enough leave to take a week off? That way you'd only be under pressure if you got to Friday 
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Ladybird84
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Joined: 26 January 2008
Location: Northland
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Posted: 31 May 2008 at 1:40pm |
Awww, you poor things.
My hubby always had problems performing under pressure too. He always managed it but it was always a bit of a stuggle - and I guess I cant really blame him for having to preform in a clinic lab!
My only advice would be to try and be supportive and understanding of him so he doesn't feel that he has any additional pressure.
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PCOS
3 Clomid Cyles
Conceived on a Break Cycle while waiting for IUI
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ginger
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Posted: 31 May 2008 at 4:02pm |
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We didn't, but a friend of mine did - it took her DH a couple of MONTHS to get his sample! As soon as he thought about what he was doing it was all over rover.
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Cuinn Lachlan 23.1.09 - 22:00
Antonia Helene 4.8.11 - 09:41
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topcat
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Posted: 25 June 2008 at 9:47am |
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my DH - had the same problem - you could talk to a fertility clinic - depending on what quality they are after you can get a special condom that you can collect the semen in after intercourse. It is quite expensive to buy though at about $50 each....
PS He did get there in the end the old fashioned way!
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catie
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Joined: 19 December 2006
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Posted: 25 June 2008 at 1:31pm |
Hey Vanilla bean
At F+ in akld there is a sign in the 'sperm production room' (or whatever it's called) saying 'If you are having trouble producing a sample please tell the nurse'. I have no idea what they do about it, but presume that means they can do something, and it's not all that uncommon. The first time Dh went they made a point of saying that I could go in with him, presumably to give him a hand - they were amazingly matter-of-fact about it all. Don't know if your DH has to do it at the clinic, but if so maybe he/you could ask their advice, or you could help out? If not, the special condom sounds like the go!
Good luck,
Edit: just saw your ticker - I guess there's no longer a problem 
Congratulations!
Edited by catie
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CherryBaby
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Posted: 28 June 2008 at 12:24am |
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yeah congratualations vanillabean
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Vanillabean
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Joined: 17 January 2008
Location: Wellington
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Posted: 28 June 2008 at 10:25pm |
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Thanks for your advice. It is reassuring to know that we are the only ones with this problem.
Things have changed a bit now with recent events and rather than being worried about conceiving I'm now stressing about recurrent miscarriage. I've now had two which is likely to be just bad luck but its possible that there is some other problem behind it.
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pikelets
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Joined: 08 April 2007
Location: Auckland
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Posted: 29 June 2008 at 10:51am |
 to you Vanillabean
Can your hubby do it at home and drive it there? May be less pressure than being at the clinic. Thats what my husband did plus he did it when I wasn't home so as not to feel pressured.
Sorry hear you are stressing about recurrent miscarriage.
I hope it all works out for you
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 3 Angels - Dec10 / Mar11 / Dec11
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Maya
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Posted: 02 July 2008 at 7:31pm |
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Hugs Vanillabean, sending your bean some sticky vibes.
I have no experience with sperm samples myself but I interviewed a couple recently about their experience of infertility and one of the things that stood out for me was something the husband said about the enormous pressure he felt, not just in a physical sense ie. providing a sample, but that his wife was going thru so many more invasive tests and procedures he felt that he was letting her down if he couldn't perform so to speak coz he considered his part of the process should be straightforward.
I didn't summarise that very well I don't think, but the story is in the Autumn OHbaby! mag in his own words.
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problem getting spm sample