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   EthansMummy  
   
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     Topic: HELP - DH vs. Antenatal classes     Posted: 06 May 2006 at 1:49pm | 
 
 
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   Yes the title is serious.  DH is dead set on not coming to the classes with me.  
 
 This is our first child and i really want to go (in fact i will go by myself if i have to) but he is not going.  
 
 He has a sister who has three kids and his brother was born when he was 19 so he knows about baby's but i know nothing.  
 
 The main reason he doesn't want to go is because he thinks he will look silly, sitting behind me doing the breathing thing.  Do they actually do this. 
 
 I have tired to pursuade him and have nearly got there but need more tips for getting him there. 
    
   
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     Posted: 06 May 2006 at 1:50pm | 
 
 
  
   
   
   Cant say we have had anything like breathing etc apparently most classes dont show u this anymore??
 
My DH goes and loves it he has learnt so much   
    
   
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   98765  
   
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     Posted: 06 May 2006 at 1:53pm | 
 
 
  
   
   
   We didn't do the breathing thing at ours. Tell him its a good way for u to meet friends. My partner didn't want to go either so i sed he would get a 'reward'    and once he went to one he went to the rest cos he liked them.
     
   
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   Paws  
   
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     Posted: 06 May 2006 at 1:54pm | 
 
 
  
   
   
   Maybe just point out that it's different because this is his child and you really want him there to share in all parts leading up to the birth and after and besides he can look silly with other dads-to-be and if that fails you could use Jenny McCarthy's recommendation in her book - cry.    Hehehe just kidding!
     
   
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   Kazzle  
   
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     Posted: 06 May 2006 at 2:20pm | 
 
 
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   they dont do the breathing thing in nz as apparently they found that when you are in labour you tend to get so hooked up on trying to breath properly that you forget to actually focus on contractions and other important stuff and it can hinder the process....or at least that what we were told in our antenatal classes.
 
 Antenatal classes are a good way to meet lots of new ppl.
 
 So just tell that partner of yours, that there is nothing to worry about and it will be fun
    
   
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   Maya  
   
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     Posted: 06 May 2006 at 3:00pm | 
 
 
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   Can't help there - Willie refused to go too, and I ended up taking my best friend instead. BUt we didn't do the breathing thing either, and most of the Dad's thought it was pretty cool when they got to have a go with the gas to see how it works.
    
   
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   Kelpa  
   
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     Posted: 06 May 2006 at 3:15pm | 
 
 
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   Its more about what happens at the birth. What pain relief etc. What Dad to be can be doing. About after the baby comes. Not really any of that great exercising and stretching that you see on the movies!!!
 
 
 
    
   
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   Nic01  
   
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     Posted: 06 May 2006 at 4:05pm | 
 
 
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   Our antenatal classes were more about what happens at the birth too. How to tell you're in labour, what he can do to help make things easier for you etc. There was definitely none of those breathing exercises - the closest they came was showing the guys a good way to massage your back to help with the pain.
    
   
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   robyn  
   
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     Posted: 06 May 2006 at 4:14pm | 
 
 
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   we didnt do the breathing thing either, ours was more of a class room sitting round listening type of thing and there was only about 2 ladies who didnt have their partner with them so he certainly wont feel out of place.
    
   
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   fattartsrock  
   
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     Posted: 07 May 2006 at 2:13pm | 
 
 
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   No breathing here either.  My DF has a 14 year old, and didn't want to come, so I asked him to meet me half way and come to half of them, the first couple mostly, becsue by then i would "know" the others and wouldn't feel like such a twit on my own. Good luck!! P.S, the Jenny Mccarthy book paws mentioned is a cool book, it is called "Belly Laughs, the naked truth abouth pregnancy" Very very funny!
    
   
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     The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P
     
   
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   pepsi  
   
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     Posted: 08 May 2006 at 8:48am | 
 
 
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   Hi Linelle, I started a post the other week about exactly the same thing cause my Hubby also doesn't want to go to the classes. I know I'm not going to be able to change his mind so I've given up! haha 
 
 http://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=2301&PN=3
 
 
    
   
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   Deez  
   
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     Posted: 08 May 2006 at 8:54am | 
 
 
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   My partner doesn't come with me either, so my sister & stepmum come along instead.  It's our first baby too but i figure there's not much point in making him come if he doesn't want to, he would end up peeing me off all night.
 
 
 
    
   
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   lenabeanz  
   
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     Posted: 08 May 2006 at 9:24am | 
 
 
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   My man wanted to come and did and loved it cause most of the time the boys went into another room and did different activities (to this day none of them have told us what!!)
 There is a group of 5 couples and we still keep in close touch (about 10 were in our class) - So if you don't go for anything else then go to meet some people!! 
    
   
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   newmum  
   
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     Posted: 08 May 2006 at 1:37pm | 
 
 
  
   
   
   MY Dh didn't want to go either but I put my foot down and he ended up loving it!!!! The other dads felt just as stupid on the first night but the were all totally in to it after the first class!      
    
   
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     Posted: 08 May 2006 at 2:57pm | 
 
 
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   Yep agree with Ana cory actually enjoys it but we cant do the last one on thursday due to moving and taking stuff over thursday night etc and mum being down just bad timing really :)
    
   
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