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fire_engine 
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 Topic: Waking at night - hungry, habit, other ??
Posted: 14 July 2009 at 1:56pm |
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Our nearly one year old (eek) is still having a dreamfeed. We have started bringing it forward so we can phase it out but we're having difficulty with him waking over night and only settling if he's fed. He's good at self settling at other times.
How do we know if it's hunger or if it's just habit and we have to be mean and break it (and we're not in the headspace for that)???? I'm not comfortable leaving him to sort himself out if he's really hungry but am also not that delighted about the prolonged wakings.
Help!
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Mum to two wee boys
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kellie
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Joined: 02 February 2009
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Posted: 14 July 2009 at 2:06pm |
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I am having a similar issue with habitual wakings, I was advised to give water instead, and to try and cram an extra feed into the day at some stage so you can be sure they are not hungry.
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Leahsmummy
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Posted: 14 July 2009 at 3:04pm |
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We stopped her dreamfeed a couple of months ago, the first night was pretty bad awake every hr from about 1am til 4am ish but i just went in gave her a cuddle and put her back in she would cry but settle then an hr later then same thing, i was buggered the next day but the next night was still up a couple of times but not as much and then the next night was better then the following night she slept right through...... But i kinda think she was over her dreamfeeding coz when i went in to get her she wouldnt wake up until i got her up and changed her bum (usually she would wake right up have her bottle and go back down easy)
Good luck and i hope it works for you.
And propb just make sure he is eating enough through the day, which "should" hold him over til the morning.
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.Mel
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Posted: 14 July 2009 at 9:12pm |
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Have you tried to drop the dream feed cold turkey? Maybe the dreamfeed is now disrupting his sleep rather than encouraging it??
Are you giving it to him so he stretches that little while longer over night? There could be a number of things contributing to his waking, cold, hunger, scared, dreams , lonely, ears etc...
I don't think you need to be mean at all, you just need to find the cause.... when he wakes is he upset or is he just moany?
Check out www.dreamparenting.com for some handy hints or www.pantley.com (huge fan of both these ladies)...
Good luck.
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ElfsMum
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Posted: 14 July 2009 at 9:15pm |
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we found his dreamfeed was actually disrupting his sleep..dropped it cold turkey and it worked for us..?
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Mum to two amazing boys!
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emz
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Posted: 14 July 2009 at 9:39pm |
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The dreamfeed is only supposed to be used (apparently) until solids are fully established (around 6-7 months max) as then they are receiving enough intake during the day from food, they shouldn't need that extra feed.
I would say at a year its habit, or something else waking him. Is he cold at all?
We stopped the dreamfeed but gradually limiting the quantity until I just stopped getting him up. If he woke, I'd give him warm water in a bottle. he soon learnt he wasn't going to get anything else so just stopped waking up.
At that age they really shouldn't need food in the night. best to break the habit now instead of it becoming a worse habit when they're say, 2 or 3, and wanting a biscuit in the middle of the night (I know someone who lets that happen - what a PITA!)
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fire_engine
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Posted: 15 July 2009 at 8:58pm |
Thanks for all the tips. I feel a bit  that we're still DFing - we did stop but he would then wake at 5 consistently. We've also had some issues with him eating enough during the day and cos of his history, I am paranoid about his weight. And (probably most significantly), DH  the DF.
What I'm thinking is that maybe I'll start a bottle after dinner (he normally only has water from about 1pm on, then a bottle before bed), AND continue with his bottle before bed. At the same time, I'll reduce the amount given in each DF by 15 or so ml, so that over a week it will be phased out. DH has requested earplugs in case we need to be mean parents.
When he wakes, he starts out just grizzling but then accelerates. 2 nights ago, DH was up for an hour trying to calm him. That said, last night he woke twice at heinous hours but self-settled.
Watch this space!
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emz
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Posted: 15 July 2009 at 10:37pm |
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Don't feel silly - one thing I just remembered this morning was that we tried to start it up again when Jack was about 9/10 months old because he was driving me nuts with his waking. Now THAT was silly!
I like the idea of constantly giving him his milk after dinner - pack him full to bursting and surely he'll sleep!
Phasing out of the DF is the best way to go I reckon. I never gave Jack more than 120ml anyway, so just dropped a bit each night till he was getting about 50ml then would give him water if he wanted more (warm so it feels the same when it hits the lips). Eventually he was having more water than milk (cut the milk right out one night) and it wasn't satisfying so he stopped drinking and we just gave him a wee suck on his bottle for the first few nights after this to show him that it was just water - hey presto no more DF and funnily enough, didn't wake unless he was teething or sick.
Good luck, I loved the dreamfeed too, such lovely cuddles!
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crafty1
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Posted: 16 July 2009 at 4:17pm |
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Sorry Flissty no advice just saying hi!
It's Angela from R+. I've been spending time on here for obvious reasons not yet to announced at work.
Daniel looks so damn cute, can you believe how quickly that first year goes? Good luck with the df, it does sound like habit. Like th others the method i've heard about is offering water instead or watered down milk the first few nights then water only and most babies drop it without much fuss.
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fire_engine
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Posted: 16 July 2009 at 4:22pm |
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LOL, welcome!!! Tis a small world in babyland. Can't see your ticker but I'm guessing there's another one on the way?! He's 1 in 4 days, and I am SO not ready for a 1 year old.
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crafty1
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Posted: 16 July 2009 at 7:25pm |
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hmmmm yes not sure what's happened to the ticker. Yes #2 is on the way but early days yet. We must be gluttons for punishment, ever since we found out Alex's sleeping has gone all over the place. I'm sure it's some kind of conspiracy.
Have a great 1 year party, hope the weather is nice if you are doing something this weekend for it. Is he walking, talking or anything exciting like that? Alex is doing neither particularly, just likes to chill out and play quietly really - no complaints with that!
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Waking at night - hungry, habit, other ??
