age between your babies

My son is 11 now (from a previous relationship) and my daughter is 4. When the boarder arrives they will be 12 & 5. I would have liked to have had boarder earlier but it just didn't happen.

I have 5yr between my 1st 2 and 6yr between #2 and #3. It wasnt planned that way, it has just sort of happened. I enjoy the age gaps as for 1 I just dont know if I could cope with anymore that 1 under 5 and I really love watching my girls interact with my baby. It definitely brings out the patient, loving side of them esp my 11yr old....However I know it wont be all roses when hes older breaking into their rooms terrorising (sp?) them lol

AnnC wrote: Having kids close in age scares me LOL

  Me too!!!!!!!!

Can I just make a request to those with a large gap between kids? Please remember that those older kids have a genuine need for one-on-one parent/kid time too.

I am 10 years older than my sister, and 12 years older than my brother. My brother is special needs (Aspergers and Foetal Alcohol) in addition to being born 13 weeks early. He was adopted by my parents at birth, but as he arrived so unexpectedly early we took a lot of trips from Katikati to Auckland to see him before he finally came home when he was 4 months old. DB needed my parents attention, which was fine. As DS was only a couple of years older than DB, she needed my parents attention too... which was also fine.

What wasn't so good was that as we all got a little older my brother and sister still got most of my parents attention. I basically got on with my life (as I was expected to do) and got very little one-on-one quality time with my parents as when they weren't spending time with DB and DS they were spending time with each other. I felt like I got lost in the shuffle.

I have a bit of a problem with jealosy of my sister at the moment. She's nearly 16, and getting the sort of one-on-one attention now I didn't get at her age. I'm working on this, and I'm trying not to let it affect my relationship with any of them (as I'm getting on really well with them all at the moment) but its still there.

I have a 15 year old stepson. He was 13 when we had Jacob, and his mother was expecting a baby 2 months after Jacob was born, so it was a double whammy after having his parents and step parents to himself for so long (and being so so spoilt!). He has adjusted very well to all these new additions, but he did have a bit of a hissy when we announced #2 was on the way, he said "there will be no room for me anymore" He did some around, and just loves his sister to bits. Anyhow, I am very very careful to give him and rod plenty of space and oppertunity to have one on one time, although, as he is 15, he is busy doing his own thing alot anyhow, and I always invite him along if I am doing something with his brother (and now sister) and often, he comes along. There is plenty of potential for disaster at this fragile age, so it pays to be aware, as Becca pointed out in her case. Hugs, Becca, i really feel for you!

Roksana wrote: Oh no Emma.....it must have been a full on house!! So do you have any DSD OR DSS living with you at the moment??

Nope (hallelujah!)