anyone gone through their teenage years w

My parents separated when I was 17 and my Mum left us with Dad (her choice). I had obviously already been through the sex talk and first period, first bra etc although I can't say that my Mum was particularly great at all that stuff My sister was only 15 so had longer at home with just Dad. Dad was great, we could talk to him about anything (even before Mum left) and for things like pads and tampons we just gave him a wee shopping list before he did the shopping and he would leave them in the bathroom for us or in our rooms. Or we'd go shopping too and he wouldn't question bathroom products.

My best friend from primary school lived with her dad from much younger and he had to take her shopping for her first bra. I don't know exactly how he brought it up but he took her to Ballantynes in Chch and got her fitted properly and bought her some really cool new underwear and I think it made her feel really grown up and cool.

I don't think it's impossible AT ALL and if he already has a good relationship with his daughter and WANTS to be there for her he will be. I'm not saying there aren't moments when things can be awkward but my Dad did a great job with my sister and I (and our younger brother) and so did my friend's Dad with her.

There are fathers that don't have a choice about bringing up their daughters during their teenage years and they do a great job too. Just like there are single mums who bring up teenage sons and do a fantastic job.

And yes, you're right, you do talk about all those things with your friends at school - usually long before your parents bring them up Also I had a close relationship with my Nan, my aunties and more recently my MIL so I don't feel like I missed out on "mother figures" at all, I had plenty of grown ups to ask for help/advice in any situation.

I have since rebuilt my relationship with my Mum too (over the past 5 years really) and that's been encouraged by my Dad and also my DH.

HTH. Good luck.

My uncle raised his two daughters after their mother walked out when they were 1 & 2, they're both grown now and have clearly been having periods and sex for some time.....

There are always other females around if they need someone to talk to, grandmas, aunties, cousins or even friends or mothers of friends. Not a good argument I wouldn't say.

Yes, my parents split up just before I started pubity, and my brother and I stayed with our Dad. I must admit that when I started my period I told my Dad and he said "tell your mother" lol, but other than that it was fine. We still got to see Mum in the weekends (and then in the holidays once she moved citites) and I don't feel like I missed out on anything. Mum does though, she is now trying to "make up for lost time" with my brother and I, but it's all good. In our case we were better off staying with our Dad. I've read some of your other topics about this situation and it sounds like in this case your neice would be better off with her Dad too...

A close friend lived with just her dad during high school. They had gone through a custody dispute and finally got put with their dad. Social services assumed that it was her dad abusing them, instead it was their mum.

Anyway, she preferred living with her dad a million times more and turned out ok in the end.

Has anyone asked what the daughter wants? Not sure how old she is though.

Um, well, if she is your niece then surely you have contact with her and can chat during those years...your mum too. That is a dumb excuse.

hope your bro gets full custody. his ex sounds....unstable.