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Jay_R 
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Location: Onehunga, Auckland
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 Topic: What do you think?
Posted: 12 February 2010 at 4:18pm |
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If a child refuses to eat their lunch at daycare (same meal as all the other children), should they then be punished by not being allowed afternoon tea?
I'm having huge issues with my son's daycare, and today I was informed that because he turned his nose up at lunch (two minute noodles, luncheon and mixed veges) he would not be offered afternoon tea. I'm fuming, as the thought of my little man not getting any food in his tummy since 9.30am this morning just breaks my heart. I actually don't blame him for refusing to eat that crappy meal!! I would too.
What do you ladies think? Should I be making an issue out of this, or are they doing the right thing?
ETA: I believe that he's already been punished by not having anything to eat for lunch, and that witholding afternoon tea as well is double punishing for one crime so to speak.
Edited by joshierocks
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becky
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 4:24pm |
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Im sorry but that is bad IMO I am just in the process of putting DS in daycare and if they told me that they did not give him afternoon tea due to him refusing lunch I would pull him out!!
One thing children know is when they are hungry DS refuses to eat and I usually dont offer him something else straight away but will try again in half to an hour later.
Day care should also do this esp with all the playing they do, and they probably dont get to graze as much as they may do at home.
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Bombshell
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 4:27pm |
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NO WAY - and that lunch sounds awful! Ours always has cooked lunch....heck that is terrible!
also the afternoon tea tops them up - esp those who dont eat well at lunch Im guessing so punishing them by food restrictions is not good at all! ALso there should be alternatives for lunch - we have a halal / vegetarian one and a sandwich option at ours (so yes she has had a few marmite sandwiches at different stages for lunch!LOL!) but never been refused the afternoon tea etc!!!
talk to the owner / manager and see what is going on....one food wise and two re the punishment.
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arohanui
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 4:28pm |
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That's really bad! I totally agree that he's already been 'punished' by the natural consequences of having no lunch.
I would not be happy at all and would be having serious words to the daycare staff/management.
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Mama to DS1 (5 years), DS2 (3 years) and... 
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SMoody
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 4:29pm |
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Your child your rules. Tell them straight off that that is not on and that he should be offered his food at afternoon tea.
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kiwisj
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 4:31pm |
I completely agree that witholding afternoon tea is being punished twice. Not only that, but I also believe that kids that age are too young to put the two things together (ie, lunch is way too long ago that they will even remember what they're being punished for).
I would speak to the centre manager as BS suggested and make sure they know what's going on. If they agree with the teachers  then I would be pulling him out.
And  at that lunch, is that what they call "cooked" lunch???
(ps, to clarify - i have been known to give C noodles sure, but I think that's a poor excuse for a cooked lunch when they're charging you for it!)
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SJ
Callum - Dec 2008
Daniel - Oct 2010
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High9
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 4:35pm |
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I don't have a baby yet... but that doesn't sound on, I mean obviously if he doesn't want lunch they can't force it on him but thats just cruel to refuse him the next meal.
It's like they're trying to teach him if you don't eat lunch you don't eat at all, and while that may work it seems a little harsh iygwim...
I would definitely talk to them about it
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arohanui
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 4:41pm |
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Yeah thinking more about this, they really should offer the sandwich option if the kid doesn't like the 'cooked' lunch. I mean really, as adults we don't like everything and wouldn't be expected to eat whatever we're served up!! It doesn't mean we're 'naughty' for not eating lunch, it just means we don't like it!!! And it's not hard or expensive to make a boring marmite sandwich.
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Mama to DS1 (5 years), DS2 (3 years) and...
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caliandjack
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 4:42pm |
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Agree with everyone else no way should they be with holding food.
Also what are you paying daycare for if they're not going to feed your son.
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mummy_becks
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 4:43pm |
Nope that is not on. He may be going through a stage where he is not hungry at lunchtime and hungry at a different time. Report them if you have no luck with the head teacher.
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I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
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caliandjack
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 4:51pm |
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two minute noodles, luncheon and mix vege is a pretty average lunch, high in fat and not very nutritious don't blame him for not eating it
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[/url] Angel June 2012
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arohanui
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 4:55pm |
Just read your other thread in the kindy section - if it was me I'd be seriously looking into changing centres. Is that a possibility? It sounds like you're not happy with how things are going there overall, and like they're not very understanding in trying to help your little boy 
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Mama to DS1 (5 years), DS2 (3 years) and...
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caitlynsmygirl
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 5:00pm |
 SMoody wrote:
Your child your rules. Tell them straight off that that is not on and that he should be offered his food at afternoon tea. |
totally agree
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High9
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 5:07pm |
arohanui wrote:
Yeah thinking more about this, they really should offer the sandwich option if the kid doesn't like the 'cooked' lunch. I mean really, as adults we don't like everything and wouldn't be expected to eat whatever we're served up!! It doesn't mean we're 'naughty' for not eating lunch, it just means we don't like it!!! And it's not hard or expensive to make a boring marmite sandwich. |
I was actually just thinking this...
Are you able to provide lunch for him at all? Or leave some snacks in his bag?
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pikelets
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 5:34pm |
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OMG! I would be furious and so upset.
I don't pay $245 per week for my child to eat a meal that costs less than $2 bucks! Plus their bellies are so small they need filling up more often. Disgusting!
I changed my DS daycare for numerous reasons but one was similar. They gave him crap food and only popcorn for afternoon tea. The time I picked him up, he was ready to gnaw off his own limbs!
Is it worth you complaining though???? Our last daycare had crap managers so was like talking to a brick wall. We now have him going to a chain daycare as I think they are more regulated IYKWIM (someone to answer to).
Think you should look at changing hun!
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ooEvaoo
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 5:37pm |
Oh yes sir reeeee...do something about this!!. Take him out....but also take this up with someone in authority because if it's happening to you're boy, it is most probably happening to the other kids. That is sooo not on!...and I would definitely give them my piece of mind about it.
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Raspberryjam
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 5:47pm |
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Thats disgusting - how can these people be trained childcare teachers!!
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http://lilypie.com] 
http://lilypie.com] 
http://lilypie.com] 
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Manda08
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 5:52pm |
He is 3 nearly 4, he is too young to be punished for not eating his lunch! He should have been given something else, even if it was a piece of fruit or a sandwich! I would be speaking to the manager, and if you dont get her support, look for a new daycare....
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lilfatty
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 5:57pm |
Id be  and I would be telling them in no uncertain terms that at NO time are they to withhold food from my child.
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jazzy
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Posted: 12 February 2010 at 6:08pm |
What kind of daycare is that?
I think I would be withholding $$$ if they served that crap up to my child.
I would look elsewhere, if they punish with no food when a child wont eat food what do they do about other things. I would have warning bells going off.
I worked in early child care for for a few years & we would never of punished a child for not eating, but then we always made them hot nutritious meals.
There are some really good centers our there & they may cost a bit more, but they are so worth it 
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What do you think?
