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snugglebug 
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 Topic: 45 minute waking
Posted: 27 January 2011 at 3:14pm |
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My boy is getting better with his sleeping, he used to wake up after 10 minutes when put down during the day and refuse to sleep again.
Since moving him to his own room for day sleeps I have sorted that out and now he gets a good 2-3 hours.
But the problem is he wakes up like clockwork after 45 minutes most times, you can set your watch to it! I know that's a sleep cycle.
Sometimes I can resettle him by putting his dummy back in, shushing, and stroking his forehead. I have turned him on his side facing away from me and patted his back but that only occasionally works. I have even tried going in to try and 'reset' him before he wakes, which has worked once or twice but most of the time it doesn't.
What I can't understand is why it's happening? On a bad day he'll wake crying and then nothing will resettle him short of getting him out of bed and rocking, and sometimes even that doesn't work and the sleep is ruined so he stays up and gets overtired.
Is this just a phase he is going through? Is there anything else I can do?
I have bought a white noise CD so I'll try that. He sleeps swaddled and with a dummy. He doesn't like the swing, he will sometimes sleep in his rocker, but I really prefer him to sleep in his bed.
He has reflux and is irritable at times so the only way to settle him to sleep is rocking and cuddling at the moment, but I am working on weaning him out of it by putting him down when he's sleepy but not asleep, but this is going to take some time to perfect.. is that why he does it? Because he's reliant on me to go to sleep?
Any help appreciated
Edited by LittleN
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Me 28, DH 29 DS born 20 Nov 2010 (4 years old) #2 due October 7 
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BriAndOlisMum
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 3:23pm |
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Hopes
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 3:33pm |
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Yea - waking after a sleep cycle seems to be SUCH a common problem. Who'd have ever known it would be that hard to get the tired little beggars to sleep?!
I'm learning to live with it. I usually manage to get back to sleep once a day, so he has two short sleeps and one slightly longer one. I don't think it's enough, but what can you do? I'm figuring if I just relax and go with it at least I won't be stressing.
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Nothing
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 3:39pm |
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My girl did that, and still does, her main problem was she woke up needing to be burped (still does). Have you tried elevating his cot at one end? Make sure his feet are against the end of the cot so he doesnt slide down under the blankets. Nothing has really worked here, she is slowly starting to have longer sleeps now, but if she doesnt then we just go with the flow. If you can try and fix it while he is younger its much easier than when they are older.
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KiwiL
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 7:46pm |
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Ollie also did that and, without clicking the links above, one of those threads might be mine.
It's very frustrating. In the end, as Ollie is the second baby, I just ended up getting him up. It meant he was getting up and down more frequently, but when there's a toddler you just have to go with the flow. Very different from how I managed it first time round! We survived and hasn't done him any harm. Otherwise I was stuck in a dark room shushing and patting, meanwhile DS1 was destroying the house.
Maybe you want to try the same thing? Just shrug your shoulders, pick him up and do what you can?
As it happens, when Ollie was about 2 months old, his day sleeps suddenly got better and now I would say about 75% of his sleeps he manages to go two or more cycles. The other times I just get on with the day.
Good luck!
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mummyofprinces
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 8:24pm |
He is only little hun, just a few months old! Dont put too much pressure on yourself or him!
He is at a disadvantage because the first few weeks he was being woken by his reflux so he now he needs to learn how to go back to sleep.
My Ollie wont settle any other way than being rocked and shushed and with the experience of terrrible sleeper already i will rock him to get him stretching his sleeps.
Also, we are all different and so are our babies. So Plunkets up for 1 hour down for 2 hours might be perfect for some babies but not for others. Ollie does 45mins at about 8.30/9am then down again at 11/11.30am for 3 hours and then down for 45 mins about 4/4.30pm. Some day he will do 3 2 hour naps but not often.
There is no "perfect" routine that you have to aspire to hun, so just relax and do what works for you and N 
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KiwiL
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 8:29pm |
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Oh, I was also going to say, have you tried a sling? Some babies will sleep quite happily next to mum and you can get things done.
Ollie doesn't, but Jackson did.
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chocol8
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 8:51pm |
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LittleN, my wee girl was a catnapper too. 45 minutes is one sleep cycle - so often they will wake up after that and not be able to get themselves back to sleep. I rang Plunketline who said just go with the whole feed-play-sleep routine, and I found this the easiest thing to do. I did try resettling her but it often didn't work, and I was getting just so wound up about it.
So, when she went to sleep I knew I had 45 minutes minimum to myself - whether that be a shower and breakfast or just 45 minutes on the couch!
The other thing I can recommend is the Wake to Sleep method. This is when you go in at about 35 min and tickle their cheek til they twitch/move but you don't want them to wake up. This seems to reset their clock and would work for me for 75% of the time. Sometimes she'd sleep another 15 min, sometimes an hour or two.
Check out the Sleep Store website and Facebook discussion page - lots of people have given advice on the same problem. Good luck xx
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High9
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 8:53pm |
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Completely normal, one thing that worked for us was going in after about 35 mins and giving her a gentle poke of blowing gently on her face to restart the sleep cycle, can't remember who told me that but it worked!
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chocol8
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 8:55pm |
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PS just reread your post and I used to put my baby down drowsy but not asleep, and she would always wake after 45 min, so I don't think it's anything you're doing re bubba going to sleep on you. And my bubba did outgrow it - as they get more active and moving around more they wear themselves out - and all of a sudden she was doing 2 hour sleeps - just bliss!
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High9
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 9:19pm |
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Lily out grew it too, she slept for 2 hours (naps) and was up for 1 hour until 4 months then decided 45 mins seemed to be the trend with other babies her age and did that for about hmm 3 months and now does 2 hours give or take 30 mins.
If he is still tired I would try resettle back to sleep but if he is happy to be up - just go with it!
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WestiesGirl
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 11:59pm |
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I had a catnapper too!! Its a real PITA. I also tried everything from rocking, patting, shooshing, feeding to sleep, walking in the pram and wearing him. NOTHING worked! In the end I gave up, it was too stressful to worry about. He outgrew that at 6 months when he put himself into a nice day routine and was sleeping up to 1.5 hours twice a day. Now were on one day nap of up to 2 hours.
Dont be too hard on yourself. It took me ages to just go with the flow of having a catnapper, but its not worth the stress IMO.
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Our Angel July 08  Gone but not forgotten
And to complete our family, our princess has arrived
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naysgirl
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Posted: 28 January 2011 at 10:56am |
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DS used to be a bit of a catnapper when he was younger too. We had a lot of issues with wind so he would wake up after one sleep cycle crying out in pain. Sometimes I could get him back to sleep after getting a few burps out, but often I couldnt. It used to stress me out abit as I had heard so much about the feed, play, sleep routine and that just wasn't happening with my boy.
So in the end, I learned to go with the flow. I also focused on getting one decent sleep out of him a day so even if the other two were onyl 45mins, at least he was getting one decent sleep. Or I used to go walking for an hour so that he was getting a sleep in the pram. Eventually he started to sleep for longer as he got older so things do improve.
Like the others say, sometimes it is much easier to go with the flow, although this can be hard to do sometimes, it took me awhile to get used to doing that and to stop reading the books about what he should be doing!
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crafty1
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Posted: 28 January 2011 at 2:29pm |
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ditto the others, it's not something you are doing, he is just a baby and babies do that 45 min thing.
I went with it most of the time cos i found the resettling too soul destroying, but tried to get him one long sleep each day. If he hadn't had one by the third nap, i'd go in straightaway and put him in sling or frontpack and jiggy him back to sleep on me and then we'd both have a lie down on the couch. Nice! ps have a book/magazine, water etc and go to the loo first cos then you are stuck there.
In his own time he got over it tho and now does reasonable naps of up to 2.5 hours. You can try and teach good sleep habits but at the end of the day it's better that they sleep at all, so if you need to use props then do and it's actually not that hard to wean them off them later when they want to nap. DS2 is a dream sleeper now.
The only thing with the 45 min nap is that it's hard to feed 3hrly like everyone says you should (and i agree that in theory it is a good guide to feeding). By the third nap it's impossible when they only sleep 45mins. So don't worry about that just stick with your feed, play, sleep where you can, but towards the end of the day it will be play, feed, sleep to make sure they are having a big feed rather than snacking. I couldn't get my boy to feed 3 hrly till he was about 5-6 months i think.
I do think it's better to have a bigger gap between feeds so they are drinking lots at one go and getting that hindmilk than follow the f,p,s religiously. But just my opinion! I got stuck in a snack and snooze with DS1 and that really was the pits so i was determined to avoid that with DS2.
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millymollymandy
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Posted: 28 January 2011 at 2:37pm |
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In the early days I had a catnapper, and soometimes she would be shushed back to sleep, sometimes not. It does make feedign very hard to figure out. Just to let you know she grew out, and we got top of sleeping of it and is now a great napper. (who I'm going to have actually go and wake up this afternoon!)
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caliandjack
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Posted: 28 January 2011 at 2:59pm |
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What are his sleeps like at night?
DD sleeps really well at night so during the day I do what needs to be done she's still only young and if she needs a cuddle / rock / feed to go to sleep then I do it.
Plenty of time yet to wean her off and I've found over the last couple of weeks she's needing me less and less to get off to sleep - actually felt quite sad the first time she went off to sleep all by herself - like she was growing up all too fast and didn't need her Mum.
Each day is different, I did find that if I do the same things with getting her off to sleep at each and every sleep. I was wrapping her and popping her dummy in patting her tummy and shusshing eventually she'd go off to sleep with hardly any crying.
I got sick of white noise, got some budget nature sounds CDs from the warehouse - much nicer for me to listen too and they last for 60 minutes which is enough to get her past that 1st sleep cycle and into the second.
He'll get there in his own time, I've found it easier to go with what they need, I'm a SAHM after all everything else can wait.
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  [/url] Angel June 2012
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maya22
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Posted: 28 January 2011 at 3:14pm |
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Basically babies do this, and while it is tough on you not getting a break, it is even tougher to be you rocking and shushhing in a darkened room for four hours a day lol.
Be kind to your mental health, and if your baby does not go back to sleep after 5-10 min then just get him up and on with your day.
he will grow out of it, and it is better to listen to your baby than all the other random people who think they know best.
Edited to add - if you had a reflux baby that didn't do this, then he would be very unusual. It tends to be part and parcel of having a reflux baby.
Edited by maya22
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DS1 July 2007
DS2 Nov 2010
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snugglebug
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Posted: 28 January 2011 at 3:34pm |
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Thanks for all the advice. Ok thats cool, I wasn't aware until recently that it was something they all did and I was getting so frustrated as to what was going wrong and what was waking him lol
Its hard because he will be wide awake sometimes but then if I get him up, he grizzles and cries until I put him back to sleep, so it's usually not that he's had enough sleep. But I think I could try getting him up for a little play then putting him back down again instead of fighting with him to go back to sleep.
LOL Maya yes I do feel like I spend the majority of my day in his room shushing and rocking, and I have the music from his musical seahorse going around and around in my head most of the time! haha I have got getting him to sleep down to a fine art now, it's just staying asleep thats the problem- but at one point I could never get him to sleep so I guess that's progress.
C&J he's sleeping from 8:30/9pm ish until 3am and then from 3:30 till about 6, then he's up for the day, he used to sleep again after the 6am feed but he's dropped that, poor mummy hehe :(
I think the reason Ive been so worried about this is because he is so much better, in general and with his reflux, when he has good day sleeps of 2-3 hours. We seem to be falling into a pattern now where he will sleep one big sleep in the morning, one in the afternoon, then a 45 min sleep around 5pm and going to bed at 9ish. Hopefully he is slowly learning with this 45 min thing as Im able to settle him in bed more often this week.
He will sleep through the night if he doesn't sleep in the day but I don't mind waking in the night if it means a happy bub (I say as Im yawning my head off).
Hope this phase passes soon!!
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Me 28, DH 29 DS born 20 Nov 2010 (4 years old) #2 due October 7
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caliandjack
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Posted: 28 January 2011 at 3:43pm |
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Sounds pretty normal to me. DD has been catnapping all day today it has gotten a lot cooler wondered if that had anything to do with it.
I'm guessing once they start going onto solids that 5pm nap will be replaced with a feed and an earlier bed time.
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[/url] Angel June 2012
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sem
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Posted: 28 January 2011 at 4:09pm |
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Emily's sleeps during the day are always around the 1 hour mark or just under.
It has never even crossed my mind to try and resettle her once she is awake.
Instead I get her up, change her, feed her and put her on her mat. After 1 hour of being awake she will start to yawn and rub her eyes so I put her back in her bed and she'll go back to sleep for another hour and we'll start again.
Edited by susyl
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Here we go again, another baby on it's way! 
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45 minute waking
