I’m a vindictive cow

Some of you may remember what happened over xmas...to recap, my SIL and us had a massive fight. she accused us of not cleaning the house properly and bascially being bad parents. we tried to explain to her that it wasn't as easy as it seems and that sometimes you give up on cleaning the windows because your son wants a swing. She accused us of everything under the sun and then proceeded to say that when her baby was born she'd be able to put him in daycare (like I should be doing apparently) and go to work, AND keep the housen immaculate AND have a happy healthy well-adjusted baby.

Now, if you recall, I was really upset about all this as we were "banned" from xmas dinner and ended up having it by ourselves (very nice but missing the point), and I came on Oh baby and blubbed a bit.

Well, the baby has come and is quite colicky. She had planned to take him to work and now finds she can't cause he screams and is now talking about taking time off to spend with him. She was so obsessed with everything being perfect , that she is so stressed now that it isn't. he won't settle, she isn't sleeping...and part of me is going "SEEE!!!! NOT SO BLOODY EASY IS IT?" but I am resisting to make comments and after she gave up breastfeeding after 3 days I said "well, people always have strong opinions about how you raise your child, but you have to do what youknow is best" and that was as nasty as I got. I'm so proud of me....but inside....now thats another story

well done...but you were far too restrained!!! LMAO!!!

and only 3 days BF - that is not good....

What goes around comes around and now I bet shes eating her words.
I probably would have jumped up and said See not so bloody easy is it!! really make her think.
Hope she apologises for being so nasty with you, I hate it when people who arent parents or are pregs for the first time tell you how to do things.

Your not a vindictive cow. You were very restrained. Good on you for being the better person. Hope your comments hit home for her and I hope that she apologises too.

Awwww how dissapointing - there was no vindictive cow-ness in there at all!!

Go the Karma!!!!! Good on you for holding it back! It does take more to be the better person, hopefully now she is realising its not as easy as she once thought!!!!!

Good on you Liz! It feels so virtuous being the bigger person eh? And now that you've done that, you should go and tell her what a terrible job she's doing so she gets a taste of her own medicine (JK)

Yeesh Lizzle ...you barely even stuck the knife in, let alone giving it a twist

You were very restrained, although I would hope too that your SIL will come to see what a dumbass she was. I don't imagine you'll get it, but it would be nice if one day she apologised to you.

I have a friend who was never going to have a messy child, or an untidy house, or any number of things, oh! and birth wasn't going to hurt because she'd done coast to coast, and was of the opinion that that was real pain ...and I tell ya ...her child is over 3, and she still goes beet red when she remembers the opinions she had pre-baby!

LOL - go around and do a dust inspection at her place and tell her that the Mother's Day fairy won't visit her house because of the mess....

My first ever plunket nurse, back in the dark ages when I had the pre-teen, gave me the best every advice about windows - clean windows are a safety hazard - you need to have dirty windows otherwise children and visitors won't realise there are windows, will walk into them and hurt themselves. By having dirty windows, you are being a good host, and mother and protecting your children.

Oh dear, it's sad she said that to you but it is also sad that she is going through this. Being a Mum is such a tough ride do despite what she did to you I can't help but feel for her. You did the right thing, I'd support her for now and have a chat about things later when she is coping better.

You know what, I guarantee you remembers what she said to you and I bet she feels dreadful about it. Clearly she had no idea of how hard being a Mum is (none of us do I guess) and that probably makes things extra hard for her). If you are nice to her and supportive of her now I bet you she will feel more guilty about her words and actions than if you turn on her. I guarantee she is dragging herself over hot coals for those things she said to you. Sounds weird I know but hopefully YGWIM.