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baalamb 
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 Topic: Annoying comments
Posted: 04 December 2006 at 8:36am |
Does anyone have any annoying comments that were made to them either when they were pregnant or even now that the baby's here? I have a couple and I just can't seem to shake them! They're permanently running through my head, they're just so stupid/insane/naive etc etc.
The first one goes something like this. It's a week after Ashlee's born, about the 4th day home from the hospital. CS area still tender and sore, and still waddling like a duck. Emotional, sleep deprived, in pyjamas all day and you all know the rest.
Friend (has no children) is visiting, boyfriend comes to pick her up, we're all in the lounge, baby sleeping (finally!!).Then:
Boyfriend: (to my friend) Have you had dinner yet?
Friend: nope, haven't had anything. Kirsten hasn't offered me anything. Not even a cup of tea.
I didn't show it at the time but I felt like  and I still can't get it out of my head.
Other comments from friends with no kids go something like this:
Friend A: so how does a C-section work?
Friend B: oh I think they just cut her open and pull the baby out. (SURE! It's as simple as that!)
Friend A: so does it hurt? (um DUH!)
Friend B: um I don't know.
This wasn't said in front of me though but when I was told that it was said, I just had to laugh. SO naive! I wish babies on them just so they can see what we go through and that it's not as easy as they think. I was also expected to organise and host a huge party when Ashlee was a week old (again, suggested by a friend with no kids). And not to mention, the numerous comments when I was pregnant about 'anything could happen'  thank you, but I'm already paranoid enough about such potential events!
Anyone else wish to contribute?! 
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nikkitheknitter
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 8:41am |
The most annoying thing I had was messages on my cell phone and through email on my due date, wishing me luck. I laughed at the time and felt a bit exasperated, but as the days dragged on, it bugged me more and more!
And re: all the other stuff that you got - I made it VERY clear that I wasn't budging from the couch, and if my friends wanted something, they could damn well get it themselves 
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Maya
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 8:54am |
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My cousin came to visit me when the twins were 9 days old and said "gee you look really tired". Umm, I wonder why?
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 Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 8:56am |
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I was being BUGGED non stop by a friend who kept calling and texting EVERYDAY asking if i had the baby yet. For crying out loud im pretty sure i would have said if i had!!!
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lizzle
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 9:01am |
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My grandfather rang up and when Dad told him Jake was playing in the pool, he said "well, i hope Elizabeth is watching him properly". Grrr
AND whenever he gives Jake or taine money, he writes a note telling me that I'm to spend the money on books. Insinuating that my children don't have enough. Given that we have run out of room in their bookcase (their six shelved bookcase) - i think they have enough reading material thank you.
My favourite comment from my childless friend was
"you shouldn't have Jake in a stroller (he was 1) because he won't enjoy walking. when you go to town, let him walk around instead"
I love what experts people without children are.
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pepsi
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 9:01am |
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I constantly got told my belly wasn't big enough for the amount of time I was pregnant...they made me feel like I was so abnormal. Sometimes they asked if I was really sure about my due date!
Also I agree about some of my niggles coming from child-free friends...
Being told by my childless friends things that I already know can be annoying. Particularly if I mention something about what Alyssa is doing right now and being asked if I have tried obvious things. i.e. she is teething, "have you tried bonjela"... I mean, give me some credit for knowing about that stuff..
Also, childless friends feeling neglected because I'm not ringing them often enough. One day they will understand!!
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Maya
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 9:04am |
A random shop assistant asked me when I was due and I said October (it was July) and she said "my goodness, are you sure you're not having twins?" 
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Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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meow
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 9:14am |
lmao Emma
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caraMel
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 9:18am |
I get really annoyed by strangers who ask if I am breastfeeding. I am, but I don't really want to hear all their opinions one way or the other!
A childless friend who visited about a week after Benjy was born asked 'So have you had sex yet?' She got really pissed off when I wouldn't tell her!
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Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and:
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KH25
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 9:40am |
Yeah I hate the way strangers seem to think they have the right to ask if you are breastfeeding!! I"m not and when I was asked a few weeks back by some random woman that I didn't know "Are you feeding her" even though I knew what she meant, I was so going to say "No I don't feed her, she is starving, can't you tell???" Grrr silly people!!!
It is annoying when my childless friends come round, for example the other day, hubby was away and it was witching time (when I was trying to cook dinner) we always wrap Ash and put her in her bouncer and rock her to sleep otherwise she would just scream and scream, so I had done that and had to get up to check on dinner and my friend walks over to Ash and unwraps her saying "you don't like being all tied up do you?" then picks her up for a cuddle and of course she starts screaming! Grrr I had to start all over again to settle her They'll understand once they have kids I guess!
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Kelly, mum to DD, 19Jun06 (26wks 1lb15oz) DS1, 24Oct10 (32wks 4lb11oz) and DS2, 31Dec11 (32wks, 4lb11)
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emmaohara
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 9:53am |
Grrrrrrrrrrr i was in town with bubba in his stroller last week it was hot and I had the sun shade over him, I randon lady came up and said I think hes too hot you should take that screen off, I was like erm hello its a sun shade it keeps him out of the sun...! and who are you????
Also had the mother in law here all weekend and any time bubba grizled she was "oh hes hungry, yup hes defintately thirsty", erm no hes over tired from you not letting him have a nap all day and throwing him around
People should just leave you be and have confidence that you are the parent and know best ( most of the time!!) 
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mummy_becks
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 10:08am |
The one thing I am hating at the moment is "oh so you shouldn't have that long to go now, xmas baby is it?" Then when I say "Nope due in Feb" they look at me and say "are you sure your dates are right?" or "Have you had a scan to see if you are having twins?"
Or the "Your very young to have a toddler and be pregnant" Hello i'm 25 not 15 and what business is it of yours how old I am.
And not so much as a comment but I loved it when me and my friend took our children into town during the day. Some old ladies looked at us with a look on the face to say "Single mum got herself knocked up now we have to pay for everything for them." My friend turned to one lady one time and said "Well we a re both actually engaged, own our own homes and work at night so their father has them in the evening."
And a few childless friends who didn't quite understand why I was in hospital for so long before I had Andrew. Explaining pre eclampsia to someone that has know idea is so so hard.
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I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
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thunderwolves
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 10:13am |
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My most annoying comment was
"you know things will never be the same"
really, its like no s**t, i am going to have a baby, and yes i know that i will have it for the rest of my life,
i probably got this comment at least once a week, by the end of my pregnancy if some one said it to me they got a very snarky comment back.
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baalamb
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 10:21am |
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OMG I got the 'are you feeding her?' too!!! Well, of course I am, she can't feed herself! I would've said that had it been a stranger and not someone I knew (and jumped on the 'fornula feeding is perfectly ok' bandwagon!)
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Paws
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 10:25am |
 baalamb wrote:
Friend (has no children) is visiting, boyfriend comes to pick her up, we're all in the lounge, baby sleeping (finally!!).Then:
Boyfriend: (to my friend) Have you had dinner yet?
Friend: nope, haven't had anything. Kirsten hasn't offered me anything. Not even a cup of tea.
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Hope you pointed her in the direction of the kitchen and placed an order for yourself!!
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Katherine
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 10:33am |
Oooooooh, I love this thread. My most annoying comment was the day after we came home from Birthcare. My husband's auntie, uncle, and three cousins turned up around dinnertime, and I was in my pjyamas, DH was half-asleep, the house was a freaking mess, the takeaway menus were on display.
Auntie and Uncle expected cups of tea and biscuits, which I begrudgingly made/offered. Then Auntie, who is a nurse, started asking me about when I'd last bathed Emma. Blank looks from me, and DH, who said, "Well, she had a bath at Birthcare two days ago." Auntie FREAKED OUT, saying, "WHAT?!?! She hasn't had a bath in TWO DAYS?!?! You have to bathe her EVERY DAY!!!" Then went on to mumble about how all of HER kids had baths EVERY DAY when they were babies. She even went into our bathroom, ran bathwater, and said we should give Emma to her and she'd give her a bath for us!!!
If I hadn't been so uptight and defensive about first-time motherhood, I might have let her. Somehow we shooed them out of the house, and then, in tears, I called my mother, my doula, and my midwife and asked them all in turn if I was, in fact, harming my baby by not bathing her EVERY SINGLE DAY.
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Kellz
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 10:50am |
I rang my Nana for her birthday and my parents were there and they must have told her that Isla had colic. She then preceeded to tell me that its all my fault that she has colic, its from what your eating etc etc. I was sooo upset and felt terrible until mum found out formula fed babies can have colic just as bad.
Also I find it weird/ upsetting that people always ask "Is she a good baby?". If they mean "Is she settled/ does she sleep well/ feed well? " then the answer is no,...but its because of the colic not cos shes being bad/naughty. How can a tiny baby be bad? 
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nikkitheknitter
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 11:14am |
Arghhhh I just remembered another one... my best friend and I were out walking in Auckland and I think maybe we saw some woman and a toddler with reigns on. Now, I don't use them yet, mostly because it is more of a drama to put them on than anything else, but I can damn well see the necessity of using them...
Megan said "OMG those reigns are horrible... they are children, not dogs!!!" Boy did I get fired up. The first thing out of my mouth was "Wait until you have a runaway child!" and launched into my tirade of safety over and above anything else. Bet she wishes she'd shut her mouth
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Peace
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 12:01pm |
The comments that pissed me off the most when I was pregnant:
You had better not let your cat or dog sleep in the baby's bed, they might smother the baby when baby sleeps in it!
Err WHAT THE?
What flaming nutcase would put their animal in their baby's bed? I got pretty mad at that as it was said by my Stepmum and the Karitane Nurse. I got pretty wound up about it and told both of them off for it.
The pathetic reply was: You never know...
Another comment that made me more annoyed than angry was when a friend said to me: You know, you're quite over weight, you need to change your lifestyle or it's going to harm your baby... I can help you if you like!
Yeah I was 6 months pregnant..
She wondered why I was offended!
You don't say crap like that to pregnant chicks. I often wonder what she thinks about it now, as she is at the same stage of her pregnancy that I was when she said it to me.
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DD1 May 2006
DD2 March 2011
DD3 August 2012
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Peace
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Posted: 04 December 2006 at 12:03pm |
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Nikki, I saw a family "walking the toddler" in a mall in town the other week and I stopped and enquired where she got it. I used to think they were pretty degratory but now I completely understand the need! Olivia is going to be one of "those" kids!
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DD1 May 2006
DD2 March 2011
DD3 August 2012
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Annoying comments
