| Author |
 Topic Search  Topic Options
|
MissCandice 
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 2007
Location: Christchurch
Points: 3836
|
 Post Options
 Thanks(0)
 Quote  Reply
 Topic: Time to move on..
Posted: 30 October 2007 at 11:54pm |
|
.
Edited by KylahsMum
|
|
~ Mummy to a beautiful girl ~
|
 |
|
Sponsored Links
|
|
|
mum2emj
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Nelson
Points: 2829
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 6:22am |
 big hugs! you have been through alot, im so sorry  i cant say anything to change what has happened but you have survived it. it takes courage to be able to share what you have, and i hope that it has helped you even a little talking about it.
all i can do is offer you a cyber hug and say that ohbaby is a great place for support and its safe (you can talk about stuff without getting negatives etc..)
take care xoxo
|
|
MissCandice
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 2007
Location: Christchurch
Points: 3836
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 7:01am |
|
.
Edited by KylahsMum
|
|
~ Mummy to a beautiful girl ~
|
|
susieq
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Howick/Auckland
Points: 3771
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 7:17am |
|
Big big hugs
|
|
Faraway
Senior Member
Joined: 02 April 2007
Points: 824
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 7:21am |
I don't really know what to say except to be kind to yourself. You're no longer the person you were when you were 15.
|
|
|
|
lizzle
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 8346
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 7:51am |
|
after deleting my post five times, all i can say is big big hugs. you sounds like an amazing person to get through all that.
|
|
my2angels
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Points: 3943
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 7:52am |
|
I agree you are no longer that person and you dont need to be that person anymore. you need to learn to respect yourself and know that you deserve respect in return.
Now you have a new baby its time to take charge and make your life what you want and break the cycle for your daughter.
We are all here for you
big hugs
|
|
Mazzy
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Waikato
Points: 1494
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 8:03am |
I don't know what to say except your story has been heard and despite what you think, you are a very strong and worthwhile woman to come through all of that. I hope writing it all out has helped in some way and that you are able to start the process of moving forward.
|
|
Mum to two gorgeous girls!
|
|
MissCandice
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 2007
Location: Christchurch
Points: 3836
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 8:17am |
|
.
Edited by KylahsMum
|
|
~ Mummy to a beautiful girl ~
|
|
Bizzy
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 10974
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 8:38am |
|
sorry to say this love but this man you have now doesnt sound like he is any better for you than the other men in your past.
I hope for your daughters sake he makes a more understanding and caring father than he is a partner.
|
|
my4beauties
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: NZ
Points: 6264
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 8:46am |
Aww hunny I never knew things has been so tough for you - even throughout your pregnancy! I have tears in my eyes thinking of how hard you've had it. But I'm so happy for you that you now have a happy gorgeous healthy baby girl who can make you smile. I hope she can make you to be a stronger person in order for to stop putting yourself down. You sound like a fantastic person to me - a wonderful mother & caring partner.
I hope with you writing it all down, you feel better start to do some healing. You don't deserve to blame yourself for any of it.
Lots & lots of hugs to you hun!!
|
My babies: R (9),G (7), J (5) 
|
|
MissCandice
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 2007
Location: Christchurch
Points: 3836
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 8:47am |
|
.
Edited by KylahsMum
|
|
~ Mummy to a beautiful girl ~
|
|
Bizzy
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 10974
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 8:53am |
|
ahhh love sounds like your man has got some issues of his own and you cant help him with that... Him not trusting you is his problem and wanting to control everything you do is not a normal, healthy relationship.
|
|
kebakat
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Palmy North
Points: 10980
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 9:02am |
|
|
|
caraMel
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Points: 5342
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 9:06am |
|
Like everyone else, there is nothing I can say that will change what you've been through but I'm sending lots of love and hugs to you.
I hope that writing it out and sharing it will help to empower you and that you can start to move on.
You deserve love and happiness Kandice! You have been through the worst of the worst and survived, you're owed better now!
I've learned that sometimes you have to go and get it for yourself though.
Kylah needs a happy Mummy to show her just how fantastic the world can be.
Whatever you do sweetheart, remember that you don't have to do it on your own either.
Take care of yourself.
|
Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and:
|
|
Paws
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Auckland
Points: 5860
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 9:13am |
|
Oh boy your posts have made me cry.
I'm sorry but I agree that this guy doesn't sound any better than the others.
You deserve to be happy, you deserve to be treated like a princess! NO ONE deserves to be treated like you have been!
It is a choice you have to make yourself but I sincerely hope and pray that you can find the strength to break out of this cycle for both you and your daughter's sake.
Please know that we are all here!
|
|
|
|
cuppatea
Senior Member
Joined: 05 February 2007
Points: 7798
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 9:30am |
yeah I'm afraid I'm another one who doesn't think he sounds all that great. I also think Kebabat was right and that you should perhaps get some counselling to help resolve your past. Obviously being strong enough to post it on here is great and maybe a sign that you are ready to deal with it all properly with the aid of a counseller.
If you really think that your guy is worth hanging in there for perhaps you should also try couples counselling so that you can deal with the trust issues.
I'm so sorry for everything that has happened to you and I can't begin to imagine what any of that has been like to live through and to now have to live with the memories and emotions, remember though everyone is on here to help, even if we don't fully understand will we still listen and support you.
|
|
|
|
caliandjack
Senior Member
Joined: 10 March 2007
Location: West Auckland
Points: 12487
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 9:41am |
|
Love Hugs to you. From my point of view, when the man you plan to marry makes you feel bad about yourself and isolates you from your friends that's a scary road to go down.
Nobody has the right to put you down and make you feel bad about yourself. EVER.
You also sound like an amazing fantastic mum, who is raising her daughter in a wonderful way.
You do need to look after yourself and put yourself first for Kylah's sake.
|
  [/url] Angel June 2012
|
|
Tiff
Senior Member
Joined: 29 January 2007
Location: Christchurch
Points: 1117
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 10:03am |
|
Kandice - do come out of what you have has already proved you are a strong person who has a lot of love to share, but it sounds like you really need to give yourself some of that love.
I support what others have said about counselling, it's not always an easy thing to do but it can help so much talking to impartial third party, it can help you see things clearer and give you stratigies to help deal with other things.
Please remember you are not alone and you are a strong, beautiful mummy who only deserves the best in life.
|
|
|
|
peachy
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Auckland
Points: 3923
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2007 at 10:17am |
|
Big hugs to you. I just wanted to say, you have made the very first step towards grieving, dealing with and moving on from your past. Well done!
Have you considered seeing a councillor? I saw a councillor for 12 months when I was in my early 20's as I carried the burden of my parents bitter divorce with me and couldn't move on from it. I attended councelling regularly on and off for 12 months and I have never looked back! I have accepted my Dad for what he did to my family, I cannot change it, but I realised carrying the burden with me forever was only hurting me, no one else.
I really really encourage you to see a councillor, talking is the best cure, she helped me become what I am today!
|
|
|
|
Time to move on..
