Friendships...

I think you outgrow your friends. I also think you get over having to fight for a friendship and you kind of just let them go.

The friends that I do have I'm really close too and would do anything for them (within reason).

We've lost contact with alot of friends over the past few months, due to rumours and accusations etc (long story), and I couldn't care less if I never saw some of them again.

I agree with that. . . There are the ones with whom the connection never fades and then the ones you can't relate to well anymore

Yep I agree too! Definitely outgrow some friends. I think when you have children too, even if your friends have as well, it can change your friendship. I find because you don't get that one on one time with your friends as your kids are always around, it's harder to keep the bond.

I have one particular friend who doesn't give a lot when it comes to conversation. I'm always having to create the atmosphere & I'm too tired these days to carry that. She's got a 2 yr old & when we're together I think she expects me to care for him & he's a rough/naughty boy needs to be watched or he'll hurt the other children, or break something & she doesn't look out for him at all & doesn't discipline him when he does something naughty (which is every 5 mins). So I tend not to encourage the visits unfortunately.... would rather text/email her & leave it at that for the moment. I certainly don't avoid her though, so if she wants to meet up I will.

Edited by Italiah

isnt there something about people being in your life for either a season, a reason or a lifetime?

some friendships arent meant to last forever, a special precious few are, hold on to the ones that make you happy, the ones where you can be a hundred percent yourself and where they appreciate you as much as you appreciate them.
Some you have to let go of and when you do, just be glad you had the friendship at all, cos its nice to have friends, even if its only brief, and concentrate on the good friends you do have.

I've made that decision with a a few friendships over the years- when I've noticed things getting uneven then I've pulled back a bit. I've either wound up losing contact with them or in most times they've pulled finger and the friendships have become more even. I must asdmit, I think I've had it done to me a few times too! Gives me a kick up the bum and reminds me not to take people for granted.

I've only really 'lost' one friend since becoming a Mum- there are people I'm not as close to now that I was but I don't really associate that with lifestyle as I have other friends who I've stayed close to who live completely different lives than me! I think that reason, season, lifetime thing is very true!

Yep, I also agree that friendships have cycles. But I also think you have friends that you are friends with no matter what even though you might only see or speak to each other every few weeks/months.

These friends are often the ones that you can rely on and that can rely on you when you/them are going through a rough patch. And it doesn't matter how much or little you catch up with them, you always have so much to talk about that you sit there yabbering and laughing for hours without realising it!

I have had friends that I've just lost contact with and then when we did catch up we have both just changed so much and have no common ground anymore and those friendships have faded away.

Then I have some who I don't need to speak to every day/week/month and it doesn't matter because we are so close that we don't need that constant contact to have a great friendship. And when we do catch up its always really great.

I've found that I have lost a few of my friends after having Ethan because I am the only one in our group that has a child. There are about 3 that still come and visit me and they are the only ones I really want around now.