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busymum 
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Location: New Zealand
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 Topic: How you were raised, and now
Posted: 16 June 2008 at 9:07pm |
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Coming off from the other thread (under your roof), how do you rate your upbringing vs what you intend to do with your kids?
Let's say the scale is
A soft
B somewhat soft
C somewhat strict
D strict
My parents were D and I'm aiming for C.
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peachy
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Location: Auckland
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Posted: 16 June 2008 at 9:16pm |
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Our upbringing was between B and C. They were very trusting that the decisions we made would be good ones, but look out if you made a bad one!!
I intend to be the same, I want to be my childrens friend and to be someone they can trust and talk to about anything at all, no matter what the problem/issue is!
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Bubbaloo
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Posted: 16 June 2008 at 9:20pm |
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Our was between B and C depending what parent you got I am aiming for about the same except more consistency between me and Jesse.
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 Was danni-chick Mum to James My Angel 28/07/08
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Maya
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Posted: 16 June 2008 at 9:26pm |
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Mine was between B and C, Mum and Dad *tried* to be strict and they made really sensible decisions, but I was a particularly evil teenager, no one could have reined me in (they still can't!) so they had no chance.
I'd like to think I'll parent the same way my parents did. The one fundamental difference I want to make is to make sure they all have healthy self esteem coz I think it was my poor self esteem and feelings of not being good enough that made me turn evil as a teenager.
I agree with the consistency thing too Danni, we struggle with that already in our house.
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 Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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MelanieAndBree
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Posted: 16 June 2008 at 9:29pm |
Up until i was 12 id say C but once my dad left if would have been A.
Hmm, i think i want to go for B i think. Maybe C. I dunno. We'll see. Lol.
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Melanie.
Mum to Briahna Robyn, 3yrs
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Jennz
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Posted: 16 June 2008 at 10:03pm |
Between B and C and I aim to be the same- if I can be half the Mum my Mum was I'll be pretty darn pleased with myself 
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Bobbie
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Posted: 16 June 2008 at 10:08pm |
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I was definitely raised an 'A' but I was a fairly responsible teenager anyway (set my own curfews, rang home when I was going to be out for a while etc. etc.). But I was allowed boys sleeping over in my room and while my parents didn't condone smoking they didn't forbid it either - just said it was a stupid move (and I didn't anyway).
I don't think I'd be quite as soft with out kids though - it does come down to the personality of the child and my sis went a bit off the rails with the 'A' approach. I think we'd probably aim for a C for the key things and a B for the less important ones.
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MrsMojo
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Posted: 16 June 2008 at 10:09pm |
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I had B & C parents too and I aspire to be like my parents.
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MissCandice
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Posted: 17 June 2008 at 7:53am |
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Is there one to come before A? My mum was WAYYY to soft, she used to be strict in Oamaru. Really strict. To the point i would have ran away and never came back as it was overboard. Then got way to soft here, i wagged school all the time, smoked and done marijuana at home as a teen and mum didnt care..
DEFINATLY NOT how im raising Kylah
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~ Mummy to a beautiful girl ~
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Henna79
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Posted: 17 June 2008 at 8:14am |
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mine was def D!! It's really funny though cos now (with the younger siblings) their upbringing is def pretty close to an A. I guess after 28 years of raising kids you kinda give up a little bit when you get to the next round of teenage years
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Jay_R
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Posted: 17 June 2008 at 8:29am |
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Mine was about a C. I'm aiming for C as well, but DP is definitely D in his approach.
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fattartsrock
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Posted: 17 June 2008 at 8:46am |
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Um D++ is how I was raised and I'm aiming for an approachable c.
Have to say, the how to deal with teenager thing is a whole lot different and more scary when you actually have one in your house. I always thought I would be soft and let them do pretty much whatever (within reason) they wanted as my folks were way OTT with me, but the reality is alot different when you actually have one. Its quite scary, actually.
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The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P
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mum2paris
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Posted: 17 June 2008 at 9:34am |
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me too, I was raised as D to the extreme. Am aiming between b and c.
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Redbedrock
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Posted: 17 June 2008 at 9:47am |
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Definitely D and I aim for a C but approachable.
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Roksana
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Posted: 17 June 2008 at 10:02am |
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I would say I had between D and C...aiming for a C
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minik8e
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Posted: 17 June 2008 at 10:05am |
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My parents were probably a B - C. B because they weren't around a lot to implement it (work) but when they were around, a C. DF's parents were probably a C - but in a good way. DF would like us to raise our children the way he was raised which seems to have worked - strict but very supportive. They have a very close family which seems to have more to do with it - if they misbehaved they had to tell Grandma, and Grandma is AWESOME, so to let Grandma down was heartbreaking. My family.....not so close and I would prefer my kids to have a family life like DFs than like mine.
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CuriousG
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Posted: 17 June 2008 at 10:07am |
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I was raised as a D, DH was raised as a B and we are aiming for between a B + C
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mummy_becks
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Posted: 17 June 2008 at 10:20am |
Raised between and B and C and I am hoping to do the same.
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I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
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lucky3rdtime
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Posted: 17 June 2008 at 11:24am |
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I was a C in the early years but more of a B by teenage years. Dad was stricter than Mum.
I am aiming for B to C with Gabs. We have already discussed backing each other up, which I think is important. I'm not sure on smacking yet. I was smacked as a kid (but not excessively) and I don't think it does any damage but if I could work out a better way to discipline I would.
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SMoody
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Posted: 17 June 2008 at 11:42am |
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My mom I dont know what to say. She had different rules for different kids and just totally wasnt a great mother in my aspect so if I can do better then we are off to a great start.
My dad I will say was a C and I want to be a C.
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How you were raised, and now
