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Kels View Drop Down
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    Posted: 27 August 2008 at 10:48pm

Whatever you want to call it, im having one now so leave now or feel free to tantrum along with me......

MY LIFE HAS BEEN SHYT recently and I have been haivng the worse time of it.

All started with the Ex partner the one who left when Alize was one week old and I find out he also has a 7mth old to my Ex best friend... SO I get over that anyway..

NOW

Has just had another baby like 3 weeks ago, and him and this new girl are living at his parents. WHy oh why is it effecting me sooo badly, I mean I am soo much better off without him as he really is a bum who sponges off every girl he meets. Mercedes is such a daddies girl and even tho he is hardly ever around to see her or Alize for that matter she loves him dearly. So recently she wanted to stay with her Nana and Papa (her dad and GF plus baby live there) but I havent yet told her about this new baby. She will be devastated I mean it has really sucked for me the pass 3 weeks but nothing is worse than haviong to face Mercedes with this awful situation yet again.  OMGosh I still get tears in my eyes when I had to tell her about the Brother she has 7mths older than Alize (which she is really confused about cos she cant understand her dad having 2 babies in one year) She took that really badly and was out of control for ages where she even stabbed her older sister with a knife when they were fighting doing the dishes. It took her a whole year to get over but I had to tell her b'cos she sees her cousins from Dad's side a lot and they would have told her so I wanted it to come frm me so she knows I will always be truthful to her

BUT ARGGGHHH again I have to break her little heart....

This reminds of the call I got from the teacher in tears one day asking me to come in for a meeting when I asked why she said, "every morning we have morning prey and they go around in a circle and the kids each says a prey, everyday for 2 months Mercedes has been saying , please god bring my dad home"  Next minute im sobbing to the teacher on the phone...Embarasshing (sp?)

OMGosh life can get bloody damn hard and I usually dont like to whoa is me too much because I am too busy with my family, working and studying for that but GAHHHHH I feel like shyt!!!

 

 


Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs
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Neeks View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Neeks Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 August 2008 at 11:01pm
Gosh, I really don't know what to say Kels but here's a big for you and I hope it gets better soon
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WestiesGirl View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote WestiesGirl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 August 2008 at 11:09pm
Aww Hun! No advice just big I hope things start to get better for you soon
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lovingmummyhood View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote lovingmummyhood Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 6:06am
Awww Kels.
I hope you feel ok soon. regarding Mercedes, does she still want her Dad to come home? Has he been with this new girl long? (As in, would Mercedes have noticed she was pregnant?) Is there any chance she could be excited about the new baby?
I feel for you, and really hope Mercedes is ok when you tell her
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote BugTeeny Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 6:45am
Kels

I hope things start to brighten up for you soon.
At the end of the day you know you have three beautiful kids who love you unconditionally, that's pretty great, I'd say

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james View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote james Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 6:55am
aww kels big big hugs hun i,m so so sorry liffe is being so horrable big big hugs
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Kels View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kels Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 8:31am

Aww thankyou OB mummies, I can always count on support here when the chips are down.

Originally posted by funlvn funlvn wrote:

Awww Kels.
I hope you feel ok soon. regarding Mercedes, does she still want her Dad to come home? Has he been with this new girl long? (As in, would Mercedes have noticed she was pregnant?) Is there any chance she could be excited about the new baby?
I feel for you, and really hope Mercedes is ok when you tell her

Yes Mercedes still wants her Dad to come home. Her Dad has been with 2 GF over the past year and Mercedes only knew of the one who was my Ex BFF, so when I found out he had moved this new girl and baby into his parents house I told her about the new GF and her name. Mercedes was horrified but I just reassured her that her father still loved her. I didnt brooch the subject about the baby as I thought it was better to just feed one piece of info at a time.

I have no choice but to tell her tomorrow as I have to take her to the parents place to try on her flower girl dress her Nana is making her and I have to be measured for my Bridesmaid dress as we are both in SIL wedding party. I dont think her Dad or the GF will be there but MErcedes cousins will and of course talk about the new baby.

 


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caitlynsmygirl View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote caitlynsmygirl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 8:37am
quite frankly , F*ck kels , im so sorry , what a sh*t situation.
Excuse my language but sometimes the f word is the only one that will do

big hugs hun , i wish i had some advice for you
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Redbedrock View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Redbedrock Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 8:40am
Aw kels
What grown up stuff for such a little girl to have to understand. Life just ins't fair sometimes.
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Andie View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Andie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 9:05am
My gosh could he just not keep it in his pants?!? That's a tough situation for you and for the kids... huge hugs to you, chick.
Andie
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caraMel View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote caraMel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 9:54am
Oh Kels, what a horrid situation for you to be in.
Sucky enough for you, let alone having to break it to your kids and help them through it!
Poor Mercedes, its so hard when you so desperately want your daddy to care.
I know you'll be doing it already but just keep hugging her Kels, let her know that she'll always be better than good enough for you. Even if she pushes you away, it'll mean the world to her later, knowing you were always there for her.
Hugest (((hugs))) to you chick.
Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and:

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Shorty View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Shorty Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 10:13am
Aw Kels I have welled up.
I am sorry you are in this situation. I have no advise but I do like CaraMel's suggestion, lots of hugs and kisses to let her know she is well loved at home with you and her sis and bro.


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrsMojo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 10:39am

I'm so sorry Kels. 

 

As you know my niece is similar (she has 4 brothers and sisters all by different mums).  She is different in that she didn't meet her dad until she was 6 yo but she was really excited about spending time with him and after meeting him and some of her siblings she spoke to her dad on the phone weekly and he sent her gifts regularly.  Then at 7yo she called him up (he lives in Dn) and told him that she doesn't want anything to do with him anymore because she doesn't like the type of person he is.  She asked him to stop calling her and not to send her gifts anymore.

 

It really sux that these 2 little girls are faced with situations that we as adults wouldn't want to deal with but they can show amazing maturity.  I am so sorry for Mercedes but I do beleive that you are raising a strong little lady and she will one day see her dad for what he really is and then my pity goes to him because he will have stuffed up what could have been a beautiful father/daughter relationship.

 

Good luck with the discussion

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mummy_becks View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mummy_becks Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 10:47am

Aww Kels what a $hitty situation to be in.'s to you.

I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
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AnnC View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote AnnC Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 10:57am
aww sweetie i so feel for you and Mercedes - well actually all of you cause i am sure lesieli is feeling it too (lucky for now alize is too young to understand)

Have you got the day off???

Some men don't deserve the love their kids have for them.



Edited by AnnC
Ann


Also Mum to Josh (15) and Brooke (10)
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nictoddie View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote nictoddie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 12:18pm


sorry no words but lots of the above, life truley does suck big time for some........... and like someone else said what very grown up things for such a small girl to understand!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote kiwisj Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 12:21pm


I don't have any advice either, just lots of cyberhugs for you. What a cr@p situation to be in, having to break that to your girls

Good luck x
SJ
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Roksana View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Roksana Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 12:38pm
Oh Kels....crap crap situation!! So first of all big to you and Mercedes!!

Can you not get her Dad to come over once day and he tells her about this baby while you are there? I mean coming from him and the reassurance that he still loves her and that she is number one etc etc would go down better for her? Surely he could do that much since he finds it so hard to keep it in his pants??

I dont really have any other suggestions but what ever happens, I hope it goes well AND all you can do it to let her know that no matter what YOU love her to death!

Sorry again that you are in this situation!!

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote baalamb Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 1:51pm
Hugs, girl. You definitely don't need the crap. Roksana has a really good idea there, with her dad coming over to tell her (or at least support you in telling her. Does he realise how much she was hurt the first time?). Such a heartbreaking situation for a young girl and her mummy, but I'm positive you will find ways to make it work beneficially for Mercedes and the other kids too.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote susieq Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2008 at 2:05pm
Big hugs Kels
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