Why can’t people keep their mouths shut!?

Giving formula in training cups is no big deal, right?

Please tell me it's not.
I just had a show down with some older woman in the food court because I overheard her 'whispering' (you know that really blatant 'I'm-whispereing-but-I-want-you-to-hear-me kinda thing) to her friend that I was lazy for not feeding my child and spending more time gas-bagging with my friend (another young mum). I kinda just looked at here and said 'Excuse me, what was that you were saying about me? And then to add insult to injury "and you should be breastfeeding too. I honestly don't know why they let young girls have children, they don't look after them properly"

Uh-oh... Should've thought twice about crossing me, O'Wise One
"For one... I'm not a young girl, I'm a young WOMAN and I'm a damn sight more mature than most of the girls my age.
And second of all, Why the hell is it any of your business, and who the hell gives you the right to say that kind of thing to me!?
Lastly... If I could still be breastfeeding, then you can bet your sweet ass I'd still be doing it. However, due to no fault of my own, despite all my efforts, I wasn't able to meet the supply demands of my child after getting sick. So why don't you just piss off and keep your opinions to yourself"

She then had the audacity to tell me I should show more respect for my elders - Pfft, what? You mean you? Bugger off.

Truth is, I kinda nutted out at her. I ended up in tears (which made me even angrier)
Fact of the matter is, I *would* be feeding Eden if it weren't for the fact that she's grown attached to her damn sippy-cup. She down-right REFUSES her bottles, and won't even let you hold her when she's feeding. Instead she likes to lay back and feed herself...
I'm sure there's nothing wrong with that... Surely!?

Argh, I'm so annoyed. I'm annoyed at the stupid mole for deciding to cross me and question my ability as a parent, and I'm even more angry at myself for retaliating (I got a bit carried away and ended up ripping her the finger and telling her to sit and swivel before storming of... Not impressed with myself).

I'm sick of the prejudice that comes with being a young mum. People take one look at me and kinda give me the "oh, you poor dear" look... Drives me mad!

I am by no means an angry person... But for crying out loud! I've had enough!

I would of thought that the fact I ended up in my 'position' of being young and pregnant but decided to step up and take responsibility for my actions, as opposed to terminating, would command at least just the tiniest bit of respect. Clearly I was mistaken

I'm sick of it... Sick and tired, and I'm trying to not let it get to me, but 15 months of glares and looks of disapproval have started to wear me thin... And unfortunately the woman today tipped me over the edge and wore the brunt of my frustrations.

Ugh, I would have thought that they (the disapproving people) would have gotten used to seeing young mums given the area I bloody well live in (they're EVERYWHERE)

Argh... Sorry for the woe is me post, but I'm at the end of my tether and noone else seems to understand!

Some baby experts (eg Contented Little Baby) ENCOURAGE you to move to a sippy cup after 6 or 7 months and ENCOURAGE you to totally get rid of the bottle by 1 year!! No one told my DD1 that - she still has a bottle before bed . It took until Amy was almost 1 to drink water from a sippy cup - drove me mad!

Good on you for having a go - some old ladies have no idea and feel that because they are 'mature' that gives them the right to get into everyones business!

Yes! That's the other thing that bugs me...

If you're a young mother, it also seems to be that you must be single too.

Well, actually, my DF and I have been together 5, nearly 6 years... And whereas we didn't plan the pregnancy, we weren't going to terminate, just to keep others happy.

Ugh - Grinds my friggin' gears it does!

Some people will judge you no matter what choices you make eh?
Whichever way you decide to live your life, something will be wrong in their eyes and there is no arguing with them. They are right and they will argue with you about it till the cows come home.
People like that always make me lose my rag too, which unfortunately just cements their judgements of me
It is so upsetting when things like that happen and you can't help but be hurt by it, even though some stranger's uninformed opinion shouldn't matter to us at all.
I had some awful old cow launch a tirade on me in a cafe when Ella was a few weeks old.
I was out for the first time since DH had gone back to work and was about 5 minutes away from my house.
She had a go at me for being too young to have a baby or be married, for not breastfeeding (It was expressed milk in a bottle) for using a dummy and for not having a hat on her.
I burst into tears too and told her to go f*ck herself. Not my finest moment.
I went home feeling like the whole world must think I was a hopeless parent, when a few minutes earlier I'd been feeling awesome for managing to get all dressed and out of the house!
to you. Good on you for standing up to the old b!tch, you so didn't deserve her comments!

I sooooo hear ya mate!

Im not only young, i LOOK young ,seriously ,when i say i have a six year old i can see them thinking 'gosh...did she have her when she was 10?!" and the comments ive got over the years ,,,man !
Usually if they say something to me i say
"im sorry , do i know you ?"
"no"
"so , therefore , you dont know me...right ?"
"no"
"so in actual fact, you know absolutely NOTHING , about my life , and yet you think you can sit there and judge me? ...whats that saying, people with closed minds always open there mouths?"
by which stage they are just standing there with their mouths open wide gaping at me . Heh, now who looks stupid a?

And no, you dont have to respect her, im a firm believer in respect has to be earnt, my grandma (may she rest in peace the beautiful woman) always told me that just because someone is older, or richer than me, they are not any better, and be polite (until you can no longer stand it) but they have to earn your respect .

But heres the facts chickenwing, WE on here, and the people your close to , know that despite your age or whatever ,your a good mum, whos tried her best with BF and would do anything for her daughter, and most important ,your daughter knows that her mummy loves her more than anything and would do anything for her .
NOW, miss, i want you to read what i said , and i want you to say , "yes, kelly , oh wise wise good looking one ,you are right , i AM a good mum, i DO do my best, and no doddery old lady with too much time on her hands is going to make me feel otherwise " ...ok?

Good On you for standing up for yourself. Some people...

I had a run in with someone not that long ago but was far to slow to come up with any sort of response.
I cant remember exactly what she said but I was walking through the mall with DH and Maddi (not even Keira) and she said something along the lines of 'Thats no way to keep a man by going and getting fat'
I know I look young and was pretty young when I had Keira, but I'm now 22 (I know thats still pretty young) and I have been married to DH for over 3 years. There was definatley no way I be so stupid to get pregnant so he wouldnt leave me.
I just dont understand how people think they have the right to say something really horrible, especially if they have no facts to back them up.
And around here I'm a lot lot older than most of the teenage mums.

Gaaah. Serenity you are a great mum so dont let anyone convince you otherwise! They are the idiot not you!

Kelly I love your response, must remember it for next time

Serenity, if i had come across that i can tell you, i would have done the same thing. I would have let rip!

Big hugs, it sucks when something like that happens!

Good on you for sticking up for yourself Serenity
I feel ya though, and I don't even have my baby yet!

I'm 20 and happily married and preggy with a totally planned baby.

Anyway I always get people googling at my tummy and looking back and forth between DH & I and back at my tummy everywhere we go. I've caught a few whispers but I often turn away and let it go.

At Baby Factory a few weeks ago I went in to buy a MB with my mum, and while I was asking questions and asking for demonstrations etc and clearly have a baby bump, the old sales lady was talking directly to my mum and didn't even look at me the whole time.. wtf?? I was the one paying for the dam thing too.

It's just so frustrating, and so rude.

Serenity your post has got me riled up.  F*ck her and f*ck anyone else stupid and shallow enough to pass judgements on other people.   I think some people have nothing better to do and if they spend their time picking at and making out that other people have problems I seriously think that they must be very unhappy themselves and trying to detract from their own sad and sour lives (bit of chicken soup psychology for you).

I am not a young mum (wish I was sometimes) but I got comments about bottle feeding my baby from 5mo.  Funnily enough the rudest comment came from a teen mum who I met in AN classes so there are judgemental people are everywhere and unavoidable.  Good on you for putting her in her place.  I hope you scoffed at her when she made that "respect your elders" comment - respect is earned not given!

Regarding the sippy cup Eden is definitely old enough to have all her milk feeds from one.  I wish we'd moved Michaela onto a sippy cup earlier, she turned into quite a bottle addict.  Next baby will be going onto a sippy cup from 6mo (as recommended by plunket).

 

Where do people get off passing comment or judgement on other people? I've never come across it myself and am stunned that so many of you have had to deal with it publicly.

How can they not see that they're being destructive to people's confidence and that it's none of their business? They've obviously lead a perfect life and have earned the right to let everyone else know how it's done? Actually they're probably compensating for some mistakes in their own lives by making themselves feel superior.

I'm a strong believer in treating people how you'd like to be treated but it gets really hard when people don't treat you the way you treat them! I just hope Karma strikes them.