Where did my friends go?? (Rant)

With Isabelle's first birthday in less than three weeks .. I've realised (well Ive known for a while) that my friends have moved on.

I can understand (kind of) .. Im at a different stage in my life and Im a Mum now .. but Im still me! (And stealing from Charlys post "just a tired version of me)

Ive just got to the point where Ive given up trying

What makes it harder is .. DH moved from the UK to NZ so he doesn't have a circle of friends either and being a SAHD he doesn't tend to get invited to the Mummy coffee clicks.

I work fulltime so havent had time to make new Mummy friends (apart from you guys of course) .. so Im just feeling "alone" I suppose.

I suppose I just imagined Isabelle having lots of little friends to grow up and run around with and doing all the things I used to do .. like a grown up version of friends with kidlets

Anyway .. my rant for the year is over ..

I'm exactly the same and JJ's only 6 months. I still see my old friends occasionally but they don't even call, text or email like they used to. I'm the first of all my close friends to have a baby and the others are a couple of years away at least. I can feel them drifting away - my (former?) BF said something about not calling because she never knows when it will be a good time and she doesn't want to disturb us. Makes me realise how much of the effort I used to put in - I was always the group organiser and now I have things to occupy my time nothing gets organised (so I guess they're losing touch with each other as well!).

Luckily I have made some fantastic new mummy friends (mostly through OB!) and I hope I'll reconnect with my old friends when they have kids.

I was very much like that when Michaela was younger. 

Being a working mum makes it difficult to have mummy friends as they tend to catch up during the weekdays when I'm at work and their weekends are family time, and hard to keep up with childless friends as I want to spend my weekends with my little one rather than going to parties and talking about things that just don't seem important (or even all that funny anymore).

I found a balance by having workday lunches with my working friends every couple of weeks and I had a friend whose DH worked shifts so when he was on weekends we would catch up.  It still left me with lonely weekends most of the time, especially after my mummy friend moved overseas.

A few months ago I ran into an old work friend who has a daughter 6 mths older than Michaela.  They enrolled in Michaela's dance class too and now this friend and I catch up with another friend (who has 2 sons 5 & 7yo) after dance every Saturday, it's our mummy group.

Maybe you could take Issy to a class of some kind on a saturday morning and meet people at the same stage in life as you that way.  Or else, the perfect solution is that you, Issy and SD move to Wellington and you can join my mummy group.  Ha, problem solved!

Lilfatty - i totally understand. I am the same. Both me and DH work full time but neither of us grew up in Auckland and so dont really have a circle of friends (i am from the UK also ).

I have made a few friends through my martial arts but they are a bit younger and single, so just make spur of the minute plans - i do get invited but its quite hard to do it.

Where abouts in Auckland are you?? Maybe, if you want, we could plan a saturday/sunday morning play date and coffee??

Kicker wrote: Where abouts in Auckland are you?? Maybe, if you want, we could plan a saturday/sunday morning play date and coffee??

Awww that would be lovely!

We live out West but have car and will travel

I even went to Botony to meet Jo when she flew up from Wellington .. I had to get out a map to find where it was

Mum2Sam wrote: I think some of us Auckland Mums should make a regular weekend coffee group/get togethers. Even if it was fortnightly or monthly. I am in a similar boat as although a lot of my friends have kids, they are either alot older than Sam or are too busy with their own lives! I would just love a regular thing that Sam and I could go to

I think thats a brilliant idea .. I keep meaning to ask about having a fortnightly/monthly meetup .. it would be like having my very own coffee group.

And what I would about it being an OB one .. is that all the bubs are of varying ages .. so you would get to see what you have in store (if your bub is younger)

Edited by lilfatty

And Ella is adorable! I remember her from the nappy meetup .. gosh she would been a teenager by now

I hear that! I'm only 23 so none of my friends would even consider babies right now Unfortunatly that means they don't come around half as much as they all said they would when I was preggers.
About 3 of us girls try to catch up every wed night for a couple of beers in town and a gossip but all I ever have to talk about is babies! I do enjoy listening to their single girl adventures though

Kicker wrote: If we do a fortnightly/monthly meetup could we do a saturday morning, so that us working mums could come too. Lilfatty - where in west Auckland?? I am in Avondale so west but not an official 'westie'

Yep I definately think it should be a saturday morning thing so that the working mums can get in on the act.

Im in Henderson (so pretty outrageous fortune) not that Ive seen any people like that in our neighbourhood

That should make coffee group at your place interesting

Isnt there a chipmunks or something out your way .. or New Lynn?

Maybe we could meet up for coffee there (as its free for our bubs)

Off to have a check .. I cant quite remember what the place is called, but I was sure it was in New Lynn (which is half way for us both)?