Hi Blondie
Firstly, I am so sorry that this has happened.. Pregnancy should be something that is enjoyed
so unfair
Secondly, I'm a lurker, and currently TTC after losing my baby at week 19 (I made the decision to terminate based on the severity of my baby's condition) this was only last month (I gave birth to my baby on April 12th 2013).
At my 12 week scan my baby's Nuchal food measured at 11mm! So, significantly larger than your babies bear in mind
Don't make the terrible mistake of comparing your situation to mine, as my story does not end well.
But yes, I can absolutely relate to this situation!
I was also referred to the fetal medicine clinic immediately at Wellington Hospital for an Amniocentesis. Unfortunately, they couldnt get enough fluid from me to send away for testing, so I had to wait for two weeks, then the same thing happened again!! So it was another 2 weeks. By then I was quite far along!! The hospital didn't know why my body was not giving out any fluid, when there was clearly fluid there! Retrospectively I wished they had done a CVS and just got on with it, but they were confident about doing an amnio!
Anyway, it got to a point where by the time I got results back I would be at a point in my pregnancy where it would be difficult to terminate!
During this horrible time, they rescanned me every week, and the fluid was just increasing every time, I hoped like hell every time for the fluid to have reduced significantly.. I was a WRECK! And just felt like a shell of a person. It was mentally and physically draining.. And I put my pregnancy on hold mentally for sure
you can't help but disconnect
I wish I could give you a big hug right now because I know what you are going through
The waiting is just so incredibly hard!
Anyway.. I waited and waited.. and after failed amnios etc.. At 18 weeks it was crunch time, my baby girl had fluid behind her neck reaching all the way round to the front of her, fluid on her bowls, spine, stomach and around the ambilical chord.. Everywhere!! I was crushed, heartbroken.. Devastated!!!
Even if my baby tested negative for a genetic abnormality the reality was, my baby was not in good shape and things did not look good.. So I made the very hard decision to terminate based on the facts I had been given
hardest decision I have made, yet also the easiest.. If that can possibly make sense.. My baby was in seriously bad shape (the specialists couldnt believe how her heart was still beating with all the fluid and pressure on her organs) and with the facts I had been given, it felt wrong and selfish to continue the pregnancy.
I SO BADLY wish I could give you a positive story, and there are many positive outcomes out there PLEASE REMEMBER THAT
I searched and searched and searched on the Internet for positive stories, and found many and I would take comfort in those, but there are also really sad stories out there (like mine), every story is different!
Early on (week 13) I was told that the fluid (at that point it was only behind the neck) could resolve! And you do hear about these things resolving often around week 14, 15 or 16.. So give it time!! Perfectly healthy baby's are born all the time who had high nuchal fold measurements - I was told this many times
Doctors reassured me as I think they knew I was very fragile.. But each week my baby accumulated fluid in new places!
IF in the unlucky event that your test results are not good, or if your baby's condition deteriorates and you do decide to end the pregnancy.
I can't tell you how you will cope, but that you WILL, and it will be ok! I never thought I could cope. I never thought I was strong. But you really surprise yourself!
But yes, I have been through something very similar up until only 6 short weeks ago.. And I can relate in every way.. Only my story didn't end well, but many do
I have everything crossed for you at this hard time!! And I look forward to hearing more good news about your baby
the pre lim results are fantastically optimistic so stay positive!
AFM I am 28, a Wellingtonian, I don't have any children and that was baby #1. I have been given the go ahead by my doctors and midwife to start TTC again. And I have been assured that the chances of my next baby having the same problems are slim to none.. Such a relief.. I have to think of the positives!!
If you ever want or need to talk, I am here
Sending you all my love and support - You are in my thoughts!!
Do keep us posted if you can.. Stay positive!
xx