Having a whinge- bloody MIL!!!

Ok the story goes...
When I first got pregnant last year it was the best choice to have an abortion because I was still at school, working and living out of home and didn't think Carey and I could afford it- that was the worst mistake I ever made! I wish I kept it sooo much.
Now I'm pregnant again. 26.2 weeks pregnant.
When I found out I was pregnant this time around- my family were very supportive and said it was my choice what I do. I spoke to Carey for weeks about this and we decided after we worked out finances etc. that we could afford it, can still work, I can still learn and we can work with a baby. So we decided it was best that we kept this baby. Plus- it's not something you can just get rid of is it. This is a life we're talking about and we made this so it meant alot to me.
Also- I had an operation last year after the abortion- sort of like an etopic- but it wasn't a fetus growing outside of the womb- it was more like a suss looking lump in my left tube.
Anyways- that's another story...
So, as my family were really helpful, Careys mum wasn't. She spoke to Carey behind me back and told him that I shouldn't be keeping it etc etc...
Then when I was 7 weeks I was up at her house chatting and whatever and I told her that we decided to keep it. She nearly died. I swear.
The way she went on about it afterwards- made me feel like sh*t. Truely.
But now- so many weeks on... She's trying to organise my life!
Telling me to have peanut circumsized so he doesn't ask later in life why his weenie if different to his dads and so on. I think thats a choice Carey and I should make.
Also- she's telling me that when peanuts about a month old I HAVE TO go back to work and she'll babysit at home- since she doesn't work herself and stays home looking after animals.
Ok- No# 1- I don't want my baby near all these different infested animals, I'm talking about injured kangaroos, possums, dogs, cats, etc just everything basically.
No# 2- She has literally got TICKS- them blood sucking horrible things- crawling on her floor and breeding in the cracks of her tiles. That is so disgusting! She should have a pest control man come out and fix it or something.
No# 3- I think its disgusting having dog hair everywhere and since I'm no fan of dogs- I don't want animal hair all through my babies stuff. It's not clean and healthy.
AND- I'll be home for at least 6 months- a year breastfeeding and spending that much precisious time with my baby!
My step mum is organising a baby shower and I said it would be cute to have small patty cakes with blue icing and like the 'A B C' on them. Anyways- Careys mum invited herself in to the organising part and says- oh no you cant have patty cakes. IT'S NOT HER DECISION
And I made these cute little teddy bear invites and once again- Careys mum jumped in and drew faces on them. I didn't want faces!!!
Why can't she just leave me to do my own thing!
She never wanted this baby- and now she wants to run evrything. She told me she was spending the first week at our house looking after peanut- GET STUFFED! If I wanted someone to help me it would be my step mum- not her!
I feel like just telling her to get stuffed and to leave me alone because I dont want her to have anything to do with this pregnancy and baby- since it is MINE MINE MINE! and she was so horrible about it in the beginning.
I've cried at Carey to tell her to basically piss off for a while. But I know it's his mum and she is going to be a grandma- but I want to kill her for things she says and does.
GRRR I WANT TO SCREAM!

Oh I am the best at 'switching off' I'll try that next time it'll give her the sh*ts for sure. Oh and she expects to be invited to the city when we pick up our cot and pram. but i dont think so. ill let carey know that i dont want her knowing when we'll go and we should just do it one weekend and if she says something when we get back- ill just say something like- oh yeh i forgot about you. bwahahahaha.

*Quietly thankful that I don't have a MIL*

I am sorry to hear that your mother in law has been difficult - I hope things get better for you. I am also lucky that my mother in law is pretty good and so far hasn't interferred with the baby. Keep us posted.

It has all been very helpful... I'll try whatever anyone has to offer with trying to get HER off my back. haha

I think the only thing that's going to get her to back off a bit is if I stand up to her and just tell her straight how it is. I don't think Carey would like it- but I don't need this crap and if he won't nicely say something to his mum... I'm just going to have to be harsh or sturdy about what I say and make sure she hears it.
She'll hopefully realise what she's doing and back off.

In my opinion, it sounds like Carey needs to say something to his mother. She needs to know that the decisions are coming from BOTH of you, and that you aren't just some girl out to ruin her precious boys life or seomthing equally as dumb.
another non-commital answer might be
"well, thats something that Carey and I can discuss". I really think he needs to do something so she doesn't think you are ganging up on her, and she sees that you two are the parents and she has to respect your rules.

My MIL lives in Aus which has worked out really well, but a few times I've had to put my foot down with some of her ideas about what we should do with Jake. Not really with this, but just an example, she really wants Jake to go to the local Montessori school. I said that Lewis and I wou;ld check it out and see if it would suit Jake. She was fine with this and respected our decision. (we loved it by the way)

You may also want tyo have a sly word with your midwife and get her to tell you MIL that the first week is really important for THE PARENTS only to bond with the baby and that visitors should wait until week twop, and then only arrive with a cooked dinner, and a vaccuum.

Good luck!