Lets get debating :insert evil grin here:

Eeek, do I dare say anything

Smacking
Not a big fan but sometimes it may have its place. I think you have to be careful about why you're doing it - that it's not cos you're mad. Definitely not a first resort. And besides, Dan doesn't respond - he's a timeout boy.

Circumcision
Wouldn't do it to a girl so why is it OK for a boy?

BFing v FFing
Breast is #1 but there are some circumstances where you can't. I don't understand why you wouldn't try, but that's just me.

Vaginal birth v Elective c-sect
Vaginal. Though ironically, I'd rather have a CS than be induced again. I only say that cos I haven't experienced a CS and I'm sure if I did, my views would change.

When to start solids
When they're ready

Homemade solids v Storebrought solids
Mix it up - I'm not a saint.

BLW v Pureed food
Pureed with #1, will explore BLW with #2

Vaccination v Non-vaccination
Vaccinate. There's a reason those diseases aren't around anymore.

Routine v Non-routine
No routine early on - just eat, play, sleep. Who cares when?! Later on, a semi-routine but I'm not rigid.

CIO/CC v Not (coz I can't think of what that'd be called)
Hmmmm, don't like it but we've done CIO when we know Dan is knackered but refusing to go to sleep. Not such a fan of CC after hearing it compared to giving someone a treat (going in) then taking it away (going out) but I have found it works better for mummy-guilts! At least the first time or two.

Cloth nappies v Disposables
I mix it up. Like I said, I'm no saint.

Smacking
To each their own, but IMO the earlier you start using smacking as a form of punishment, the more it can escalate, its like 'time out' after a while it becomes useless as the kid gets smart enough to know that after a set time, s/he can bugger off and thats all there was to it. Same with a smack. It starts off as a smack on the hand or bum, but then kids get smart and a sharp sting doesnt stick around for long, and means nothing. Maybe its because of how things were when i was a kid, but its less likely to escalate to the point it did for me, if smacking stays right out of it to begin with.

Circumcision
I didnt get my boy done as I didnt see the need. I'm not jewish, and I sure as hell wasnt going to make my baby suffer just to look like his dad. Unfortunately he ended up being in the 1% of UNsnipped boys who end up needing it for medical reasons, and ended up going under his first GA last week to have it done. DP is adamant that if this baby is a boy, it will get done... but I'm not going to put my baby through that if theres only a 1 in 100 chance that he might need it later... thats assuming it even IS a boy lol!

BFing v FFing
I really wanted to breastfeed both my kids, but at 20 and with no internet access or friends to ask how etc, I was railroaded into switching to formula before even giving my body a fighting chance. With Jae i went to the opposite extreme, i dug my heels in over and over again and tried everything that anyone suggested, but noone of it worked, and at 12 weeks old she was hospitalised and was severely underweight. I do find myself struggling to understand why people either suddenly quit, or just dont bother to TRY, simply because they dont WANT to BF, but maybe I'd feel a little less strongly if I had been successful with BFing just one of them. This time around I'll try my best, but I know theres a good chance it wont work, and I wont starve my child just to prove a point again. I dont have a problem with mums using formula, theres no knowing the reasons behind it, I hated the looks I got for bottlefeeding from 3 months old, and felt like I should have a poster on my shirt saying I TRIED!

Vaginal birth v Elective c-sect
I tried to have a vaginal birth with B, i tried for 72 hours before they finally made the call to get him out... and not a minute too soon either as he had no HR when he was finally pulled out... it was horribly traumatic for me being wheeled off to recovery, and then my ward not knowing if my baby was alive or dead, and I had nothing but 2 polaroids to show for my pain for the first 24 hours, and didnt get to hold him until after 48 hours. and the day after my op i was stuck in a room with a mother AND baby, with no baby of my own to look after as he was in NICU. There was no way in hell i ever planned on attempting all that again, I knew I wasnt strong enough mentally to cope with another emergency c-section... so when DP told me he wanted to have kids, i told him the only way it was happening was if I'd be allowed an elective. I didnt care about proving i could give birth or not. I had done my damnedest with B, and felt that was enough. So jae was born via elective, and it was the best decision i had ever made, i actually enjoyed the whole experience, so much so, that i was ready and willing to do it again almost immediately!

When to start solids
B had his first taste around 3.5 months, couldnt figure out the spoon, so I left it til 4 months and he never looked back, so i did the same with Jae and she loved it too. Will do the same this time. I dont think theres a best age to do it, it depends on when each individual child is able to move his/her tongue the right way in order to take the contents of the spoon and swallow.

Homemade solids v Storebrought solids
I really dont care. I used a mixture of both, but it took her a while to accept my food, so for several months she was fed on store bought food. Not like it mattered that she was eating 'processed crap', she was already chugging back formula

BLW v Pureed food
I never knew about BLW with B, and didnt really understand how it worked until jae was well into purees, i did introduce a little bit of BLW earlier than I did with B, this time i will probably do both, have some puree to make sure food gets in, but also allow them to have food in hand to feed themselves.

Vaccination v Non-vaccination
I didnt bother researching the pro's and con's, theres SO much stuff you could research about what to give/ what not to give kids etc, I really CBA. I have seen the damage some of the things kids are vaccinated against can do, and I dont want to risk any of my kids suffering like that, so any vaccinations offered, i take. Both my kids are completely up to date with all vaccs, and will continue to be.

And I thought of another couple -
Routine v Non-routine
We have always been a routine led household, i dont allow my kids to rule my day, I am anal about planning what I'm doing and when, so knowing when my DD normally sleeps and eats is great for me as i can plan groceries between her and school dropoffs/pick-ups, coffeegroups, and the other odd trip out, without having tantrums from a tired/hungry child.

CIO/CC v Not (coz I can't think of what that'd be called)
I'm a CC/CIO parent. I give them plenty of cuddles and if they cry when I put them to bed, and I know they are clean, dry, well fed, and not sick, then I leave them to it. 9 times out of 10 within 10 minutes they stop their little tanties and have conked out. the 1 out of 10 may be because teething pain (in which case i have bonjela and pamol) or saftey sleep bunched up etc, so i fix the problem and start again. DP IMO is too soft. 2 minutes and he is rushing in there to get his little princess up cos 'she wouldnt cry if she was tired!'

Cloth vs disposable.

I have better things to do with my time than add more washing (Mt Washmore is big enough as it is without adding nappies to it!) and I honestly CBA with it. I use disposables, did with my oldest, have done so with Jae, and will do it again with this one.

LOL I love that people aren't quoting each other and having a go or getting offended and its fascinating to meto see other peoples opinions and why they feel that way. Makes me think and rethink and keeps me on my toes!

Babe wrote: LOL I love that people aren't quoting each other and having a go or getting offended and its fascinating to meto see other peoples opinions and why they feel that way. Makes me think and rethink and keeps me on my toes!

Yeah, I like that it's a "state your opinion" rather than "why the hell would you say that?" thread. It's also interesting hearing people's stories and what led to their POV - I think that often gets missed (b/c not stated or v defensive or you don't read it) in debates. Let's see how long it stays that way. Please play nice people, I'm enjoying it!

And tell me about it Sheza - as I said in my July thread, I'm so not ready for it (and still don't really believe that I'm PG with a baby about to pop out!)

I too am amazed already at the 'mix' of views people have - no cookie cutter types here!

Smacking
I grew up being smacked if I was a real little sh!t and pushed the boundaries, and don't believe it harmed me in any way.... but we've never hit DD, and TBH I want to keep it that way - but atm, timeout and reasoning (well, as much as you can reason with a 2 year old! ) seem to be working.

Circumcision
Have always been against it but not for any particular reason (however, have been very surprised to see research lately supported by WHO that promotes circumcision as reducing transmission of HIV..... so I think this may be an issue that pokes it's head back into the media soon (honestly, no pun intended I honestly couldn't think of a sentence that didn't invoke some kind of connotations!)

BFing v FFing
BF, and also an extended BF supporter, but having said that if DD hadn't been allergic to milk, and had taken a bottle before 12 months, I might have done things differently, so I don't judge people on it (but also feel that if possible the baby deserves at least colostrum, and a couple weeks of breastmilk, just to get all the immune goodies across).

Vaginal birth v Elective c-sect
Vaginal birth and dislike most interventions, but think if the sunroof option becomes necessary, I won't be fighting it (as long as I feel informed and not steamrollered by medical professionals who are only thinking about getting home before the weekend ).

When to start solids
When the baby is ready - started about 5months with DD, but it's such a PITA going from sole breastfeeding, that I'll be happy to wait longer with this one!


Homemade solids v Storebrought solids
Mix of both - once I found something DD liked, I brewed up bucketloads at home, but I think the storebrought stuff has a place too. Nothing like food allergies to make you make your own food though!

BLW v Pureed food
Did mainly pureed with DD, but think I'll do a mix next time around. Sometimes there is something nice about knowing their little tummies are full of food rather than just having 'tasted' a tiny bit of broccolli etc!

Vaccination v Non-vaccination
Vaccination all the way! I have done an extensive amount of research on the topic, and although I do come from a virology/immunology background, I have not found any conclusive research that says I shouldn't. I also believe strongly in the benefit of herd immunity, which relies on a high percentage of the population being vaccinated. Because of DD's allergies, we delayed some and split some up, but at the end of the day she will be vaccinated against everything, as I believe the effects of the potential diseases can be devastating. I think lumping all vaccinators under an umbrella of 'uneducated/unresearched' is unfair; however I acknowledge that no enough people do their research on the matter.


Routine v Non-routine
Pattern here rather than routine - and having a 30min-catnapper made me feel like a failure as a Mum (because no babies in books sleep for only 30mins at a time!), but then I accepted it and went by what DD wanted to do, and we were all much much happier. Next time round will be patter (eat, play, sleep), but I'm not stressing about the clock, or what the baby should be doing when!


CIO/CC v Not
I think *some* crying time is needed sometimes (after everything has been done for baby), but having tried CIO on one occasion, and it being a disaster, could not do that again! I think babies need settling time, rather than crying time, but you can tell the difference between an "i'm annoyed" cry and a "please don't leave me, I desperately need ..... " cry (at least I think I remember there being a difference!)

Cloth nappies v Disposables
Cloth almost all the time, but if I'm having a CBA moment then sposies will do. However, I HATE DD doing #2's in a sposie, because it's so much harder to get the poo into the toilet! Now THAT is something I feel strongly about - people throwing pooey nappies into the landfill No reason at all that sposies shouldn't have their pooey contents tipped down the toilet!!!!!

two_boys wrote: Babykatnz wrote: Vaccination v Non-vaccination I didnt bother researching the pro's and con's, theres SO much stuff you could research about what to give/ what not to give kids etc, I really CBA. I have seen the damage some of the things kids are vaccinated against can do, and I dont want to risk any of my kids suffering like that, so any vaccinations offered, i take. Both my kids are completely up to date with all vaccs, and will continue to be. . This makes me want to scream and cry. Can't be asked to look into vaccination, really? is that responsible parenting? I read on an anti vax site that most parents spend longer looking into which car or TV to buy than they do into what they are gonna jab into their kids. I find that disturbing and very very sad (if it's true, which I think it might be) There are risks to vaccination, it's not risk free at all. Most have death listed as a possible side effect as well as many other extremely horrible side effects which could destroy your childs chance at a normal life. For goodness sake at least read the package insert even if you CBA doing anything else. It's too late for me to weigh in on the other points, I might come back and make a nuisance of myself again tomorrow :)

******KABOOM!*******

Thread exploded.

.... and only on page 2 ...... It was too good to last

*like* delli.

Ill come back tomorrow and add my 2cents worth.

Me three *sigh*

I cant say that i "researched" vaccinating either, it never ever crossed my mind to...I did read all the brochures and talked to people though and I always knew I would want to protect my kids against these nasty illnesses.

And death as a side effect would be very very very rare, death from one of those illnesses, not so rare. Just my opinion!

Smacking
to a point a smack is acceptable for our boys, mind you they can be super naughty. A quick tap and off for time out seems to work.

Circumcision
DP remembers getting his done in Samoa when he was about 8 or so, and said the pain was so bad, and we would never put the boys through that pain. If they want to make that decision later in life, that's their call.

BFing v FFing
I think if you can BF and you enjoy it, then yes I am BF, however if you can't then I am not against FF at all. I have tried both for my boys, sometimes you just do what you have to do

Vaginal birth v Elective c-sect
When we say elective, I think of 'you chose to have it, because you wanted it' however most MW think of the elective if you can't deliver normally. So I can't choose between both, as DS1 was VB, twins were 'elective' and DS4 VBAC. But like you Babe, choosing to have one just because is a bit off. (I'm thinking all those hollywood stars that have a c-sec and tummy tuck same time CRAZY!!)

When to start solids
I have started all my boys about 6 months, that's when they seemed ready and the milk just wasn't cutting it anymore.

Homemade solids v Storebrought solids
Both have their places. Homemade is great IF you have the time for doing it. We made heaps for the twins but also had some store bought for a flavour change sometimes.

BLW v Pureed food
I haven't tried BLW, just pureed, and that's always worked for me.

Vaccination v Non-vaccination
Vaccinations here.

Routine v Non-routine
We have night time routines, but during the day, we are pretty go with the flow. The twins did have a daytime routine until they started daycare. I think Koby will end up with one too but at the moment he's not in that place.

CIO/CC v Not (coz I can't think of what that'd be called)
We do the 10 minutes of crying - if not settled, then the shush, pat and back down.

Cloth nappies v Disposables
Sposies. I don't have time for washing cloth, and with 3 in nappies, it's just not something I can bear thinking about at the moment.