Gender dissapointment..

This might be one of those touchy subjects but i have just recieve one of my baby club emails about "gender dissapointment" and i wanted to hear others views and experiences with this subject.
When i was pregnant with my son everyone was willing it to be a girl after my nephew was born (i guess because there was already a boy now!?) so being my first i took there words to heart and set my hopes on a girl then when i found out Bay was a boy i cried!!! i walked around the shops trying to find clothes and would start bawling whenever i saw something pretty and pink...It didnt take me long to get over it but family and friends dampened the situation with comments like "oh im sorry you didnt get what you wanted" anyway now i am pregnant again and after the last time i swore black and blue that i would not get my heart set on any gender inparticular and in fact i would love another boy because Bay was an absolutely blissful baby!! BUT in come the family and friends and now strangers saying "oh i bet your hoping for a girl after having a boy" well now this comment makes me so mad!!!
becuase how dare they make me feel horrible like i did with my first pregnancy and its these peoples comments that intensify the problem!!
I certainly do not judge those who are really wanting a certain sex because i have gone through it before so cannot judge. Im just curious as to what others think of the subject and what have they experienced.

Very true Sarah Beth, and also i felt horrible because i felt like i let everyone down! I never had my heart set on anything when i first got pregnant with Bay but it all started when others put in their opinions!

I have a lot of people say to me "oh, you have three girls. Are you going to try for a boy?" To be perfectly honest, whilst I would like another baby and I'd be perfectly happy with a boy, I would ben equally as happy with another girl coz I love my girls to bits and besides, boys scare me!

With Maya I 'knew' from day one that she was a girl, but like some others have mentioned I think I was just trying to convince myself of that because I really, really wanted a girl (knew I was going to end up a single Mum and I think male role models are even more important for boys than girls). And with the gremlins I had no idea, but I did breathe a huge sigh of relief at not having identical twin boys, not that there's anything wrong with that it's just that I have a hard enough time trying to 'get' the twin connection the girls have without throwing in the gender card as well!

emma - YOU ARE ON HOLIDAY - what are you still doing on here...

anyway my MIL wanted a girl cause she only has boy grandkids - and when we told her it was a boy after the scan she said "oh dear, thats a shame." i knew it was a boy and didnt care about the sex cause i was just glad to finally be having a baby. then along came no 2 and the when people asked if i wanted a girl i would say no, i want another boy. i knew he was a boy too. people do ask if i would like to try for a girl but i wouldnt care if i had three boys... the boys are great...

you have to be firm with people when pregnant cause they can really play havoc with your emotions, and you dont need that...

Everyone has said things so well already, I'm not sure if I need to post... but I just like talking lol!

I was so sure that Hannah was going to be a boy We never found out during the pg so imagine my shock at the birth! Then we got pg with #2 and everyone asked if we were hoping for a boy this time... I think it's a pretty general question that people ask, thinking that everyone wants one of each gender. Well I was pretty neutral until we chose the girl's name and I got the baby clothes out and all the cute little 3mo pinks!! (We also didn't find out on her scan). And after that I hoped and was sure about a girl. And much the same again for Krysti.

The comments are even worse now that I have three girls and I have to be really onto it to curtail them. I love my girls, I'm not too fussed on boys at this stage (I think you just grow to what you have actually, after my first baby), but most of the comments I get just sound so horrible and negative all the time! Two midwives at the hospital (not mine) offered me a "recipe" for baby boys with a *wink wink*, and perfect strangers come up to me in shops asking "three girls?" (which I don't mind), followed by some consoling story about someone who had three girls/boys followed by the fourth child of opposite sex

I have to be quick with comments like "I love having girls" "Imagine all the fun I'm gonna have with pretty pink dresses" etc, but fortuntely most of the comments I get are from acquaintances/strangers, not family. Especially since I have a niece and no nephews!

This must be a sore point, I too have rambled... I guess it's still fresh

i was sure i was having a girl both times and was also sure i would disappointed if they were boys - we "decided" (i put that in quotation marks as Lewis more or less made me promise) not to find out the sex, and so they were both laid on me, jake lewis said "it's a boy", Taine, i ended up checking as Lewis left to ring the grandparents, and I forgot to ask the midwife!

We are planning a third baby well down the track and everyone has asked me too if we want a girl, but to tell the truth, I'd love three boys!!! although in saying that went to Pumpkin patch today and there are so many cute girlie clothes - oh well, thats what my niece is for!

I always wanted a girl...and was thrilled when it was confirmed....BUT DH wanted a boy and would still want her to maybe come out a boy!!! He was pretty disappointed at the scans where we found out she was a girl....and took him a while to get over it....

I dont mind if the next one (yeah right!!) is either but for DH i would probably want it to be a boy...but then i know plenty of people with three girls (and not just Emma) so who knows...Id be happy with all girls....btu DH would like to stamp his manhood on this world!!!!

On a slightly different note, we haven't found out what we are having and are not worried either way (though my husband is convinced it will be a boy - most of his extended family are boys, and mine for that matter).

However, I've been having dreams almost every night in the last few weeks that it is a boy and the dreams are so vivid, I think I've almost convinced myself that it will be a boy. I still certainly won't be disappointed if it's a girl but I'm worried it could be a bit of a shock.

Does this make sense? Not sure if I'm rambling!

Oh gosh! i have things to say and agree with with all the posts but there was a big rush of posts while i was alsleep! lol so my post would end up taking up a few pages!! lol
Il try to shorten it ( i said 'try' lol)...
Iv noticed a few of you mention the MIL (or mother, i may have overlooked that! lol) and this is a big thing for me too because my MIL always wanted a girl for her 3rd child and got a boy! so she has carryed that through to her grandkids! which i think is half the reason i have problems with her favouring the others over Bay because she was over the moon when they came out girls but not so happy with my boy!! and in that sense i hope i have another boy just to stick it to her!! whoops thats an angry topic so i best not go on! lol.
I have to agree with a few of you in saying that i may well be dissapointed with either sex as i have looked at the good sides of both and feel like i might miss those points.
When i told DH that Bay was a boy he looked shocked and didnt say anything he just stared at the little jumper saying "baby boy" on it!! which made me even more upset because it seemed that he wanted a girl first time too but Bay is a real daddas boy now and DH just loves having a son and loves that Bay follows him around with his little plastic hammer trying to copy dadda (although i think a girl may well do the same too but ah well).
DH says that he doesnt mind what this baby is but i hear the strain in his voice when he says that another boy would be cool and then he said to me once (only once because he saw how it affected me - feeling like i may let him down!) that he would love a girl to call his little princess and he wants to name her cos shell be his princess yadayada! and he wasnt sure about a boy cos he didnt want to take any boy attention away from Bay!!??
Yup it confusses me too! i think hes trying to say what i want to hear but every now and then he says what he really means!

Ah well i guess (well i hope!!) il find out this tuesday as i have another scan to have a proper look at bubs sex

cat..i was 100% positive i was having another boy, yet towards the end of the pregnancy every dream i had, it was a girl! i was so surprised when charli was born