Glad you didn't take offense hun. I really do understand how scary it is to get that BFP. I think we all go through that That's why I believe you will get plenty of support and helpful advice here. It is a life that you are responsible for until the day you die after all.
I guess I was just reading the posts and thinking about all the ladies on here that have been trying for years without success how they might read this and think like myself why would you take the risk to get pregnant a second time without being 100% sure that this is something you really want in your life. I mean if you get pregnant on a one night whoopsie the odds are that despite your age your body is all geared up to do it again. You clearly take great care of your body.
Have you and your husband dicussed how you would handle it if your baby was physically or mentally impaired? What if you find out it's twins, triplets or more. Once your over the age of 35 mulitple pregnancy is a much higher possiblity. I'm not trying to scare you I just know my husband and I dicussed all these possibilitys over the last year before we finally said ok we are on the same page and we both desperatly want this so lets start trying for our third. Look theres no perfect time and like I said earlier I total understand that whoopsie happen after all thats how I got my gorgeous twins but it was just the fact that you let it happen so quickly a second time withouyt being positive it's something you want.
I really do stand by what I said though I really honestly believe that once you have this baby (or babies hehe) in your arms you will never be happier. I have yet to come across someone that regrets having thier baby. Really though I think I'll shut up now lol. The deed is done I guess and I'm probably just mouthing offf about a situation that can't be changed I just got a little frustrated.
I think there maybe a bit of me that is ok with this but I am also freaking out , and I feel with other posts mentioning what about the' little one' believe me when you are confused and frightened like me you are not thinking on that level and certainly not thinking about it being a baby at 5 weeks even more so when you have previoulsy had a miscarraige at 7 weeks.
I absolutely agree that it is hard at 5 weeks to think about what is happening as a baby... I had several very early pregnancy losses over the 18 months we were TTC and it is only very recently that I have started to think "oh I'm having a BABY"... before now it was just like seeing what happens, trying to not think too much or get too attached... as well as dealing with the initial "OMG what am I doing???"
I was young when I had my first (21) and will be 36 when this one arrives... For me I have been a mum for years now, but I have friends my age just embarking on motherhood for the first time, and often it seems the changes that have to be made to accomodate a baby when your older can be more disconcerting when your so use to your freedom and independence... It is a massive life change and if it didn't freak you out at least a bit I think you'd be a bit naive
Pregnancy can be such a scary time, not just the worry of MC but you are losing some control over your body too... it's someone elses wee house for the next 9 months and everything you do has to be what's best for them... some people love pregnancy but others find it a physically and emotionally difficult time. As you say, you can't help how you feel!
You should definitely join the due date threads in here... it's a great source of support from other people who are at the same stage of pregnancy...
Congrats on your pregnancy! I remember seeing your name once or twice last year. Am I right in thinking English is not your first language? That may be why your posts are coming across a bit harsh.
I understand what you mean about feeling relieved when you miscarried - When I got UTD for the first time I was much too young and basically ignored the fact I was pregnant. When I lost the baby a week or 2 later I cried, of course I was horrified but I knew it was not meant to be and it was better that way. I still think about that baby, who would be nearly 2 years old now I think. (I never went to a doctor so I'm not entirely sure on my dates)
It's perfectly normal to be scared witless at this point, you haven't had time to process it yet! And getting pregnant the first time you try would have been a shock too. But if you chose to get pregnant this time then a large part of you must really want this baby, so I wish you all the luck in the world :)
(Pregnancy doesn't always suck either, I felt almost completely normal. Just a bit rounder than usual! )
Thank you thank you thank you.....reading your above threads are making me feel so much better and you are reassuring me, it is great to have this support. You understand and I like that and all I was doing was talking what was in my mind hoping that similar feelings and experiences from other women would appear and they have.
Congrats and good luck yogalindy, and good on you for being so honest about your feelings.
I for one, haven't been offended by anything you have said, but in saying that, I have never misscarried so I guess I can't really comment there.
All I can say is yes, pregnancy is such a scary time. My DF and I really wanted a baby, despite me not being the slightest bit maternal, but it's something we wanted..... but believe me, when I got that BFP I was like 'holy crap, what have I gotten into!'. Sure I enjoyed most of my pregnancy and was over the moon but I found it hard to get excited or happy until I'd gotten past the 12wk mark. Mainly cause I didn't want to get my hopes up. I guess that was just my bodies way of protecting me from getting too attached to something that wasn't yet a certainty. Now I have my daughter, I wouldn't change things for the world. She is the most amazing and precious wee thing, she is my best friend yet only 5 and 1/2 months old. I was quite slim etc before I got pregnant and I was worried about how I'd look after having a baby, but just cause you aare going to have a kid, doesn't mean you have to stop taking care of yourself and 'let yourself go' as some women do. I put on 25kg when I was pregnant and thought 'oh god, I'm guna be huge forever' but since having Isla, I have actually managed to lose 27.5kg! I love my legs now, they are the most toned the've ever been, and that's not cause of hard work, it's just from lugging round a huge baby lol. Sure, I've still got a bit of a saggy tummy after having a C-sec but with a bit of work, I will get my flat belly back. So don't worry, you're body will bounce back no probs.
I just wanted to share with you too...... a women from my work actually got pregnant not long before I did. She had been told that she would have trouble conceiving so threw caution to the wind and stopped using contraception, despite the fact she was only in a casual relationship. She was also 38 when she fell pregnant so she too thought her chances of conceiving were slim. Well she got pregnant, freaked out and went on a bit of a bender. Basically felt the same way you do, although she drank a lot, hoping it would make her misscarry. She then decided to book a termination but when she went to the appointment, decided she couldn't go through with it, thinking 'what if this is my only chance to have a baby and I look back and regret it' so decided to keep it. Sadly, she found out at the 12wk scan that the baby hadn't made it. That was about 1yr ago and she is still beating herself up about it, I don't think she will be the same again.
So although it is healthy to worry (I think it makes you a better mother if you worry if things are going to work out, nobody is perfect afterall), I do agree that you just need to take a breather and relax a bit and just see what happens. Hopefully it all goes well and you have your bubba. You will look back on all this and think 'how could I have ever doubted myself' cause motherhood truly is the most amazing and rewarding thing you will ever experience.
Lots of to you, good luck, and apologies for my novel
I can understand the whole freaking out thing, when I got pregnant with my daughter I was 19 and tho I knew I wanted to keep her , I was scared sh*teless , at the thought of being responsible at such a young age for someone else ,and the thought of giving birth .
8 years later, and I can tell you , parenting is half intuition ,and half learning as you go .
Our son was planned, but even so getting that BFP scared the crap out of me , it had been 8 years since I had had a newborn , but , it all came flooding back .
And now, im 12 weeks pregnant again , and tho it was planned , I do have moments when I think "how the hell am I gonna do this "?
but somehow you just do , you learn and you make some mistakes and you adapt .
Try not to worry too much atm about giving birth or getting bigger, yes, you will get bigger, thats pretty much a given , but with a healthy diet and gentle exercise , there wont be any reason why you can't lose the weight after giving birth .
And as for giving birth , worry about that when the time comes closer , then do all the reading and research that you can .
At the moment just concentrate on keeping yourself healthy
Hey girls you brought a little tear to my eye as what I have been reading was from a viewpoint of understanding and support, you know it makes a difference i know my negativity is my fear coming out and all I need to do is talk and each day currenly is getting a little better.
I still panic first thing in the morning as soon as I get up, also I do have a question - I had a major sweat on last night in bed - have any of you had that around 5 weeks? besides that I have had a good day - actually not feeling preganat - is that a good sign - physically? would love to know any of your experiences.
What haven't mentioned is that my husband is based about 200 miles away working whilst I stay at home with my parents as we have just arrived from NZ and trying to base ourselves back here thing is he got a job miles away and he is not liking it too much...but I think the distance is having an effect on me - it is only short term though.
Anyway thankyou and I want you to know your words do have an effect on me.
That must be hard , having your husband being so far from you , especially when you need him physically and emotionally , you'll have to plan something romantic for when he returns
I can't remember how sweaty I got , but I know my body temperature was a lot higher than normal in the first few weeks, and as for sometimes not feeling pregnant , yup , completely normal , at 5 weeks you usually don't get morning sickness just yet , tho some unlucky people do , that usually starts around or after 6 weeks , and all the other symptoms start round then too, don't worry , I didn't feel pregnant with this baby until about 8 or 9 weeks
Each morning when you wake up and it all seems overwhelming , just think to yourself , im just going to get through THIS day , I will worry about tomorrow , tomorrow
I didn't 'feel pregnant' until I was about 6-7wks. I found out I was pregnant at 4wks but had no symptoms whatsoever. But like Kelly said, I was a bit warmer than normal during the first wee while too.
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That's why I believe you will get plenty of support and helpful advice here. It is a life that you are responsible for until the day you die after all.
yogalindy wrote:
)
to you, good luck, and apologies for my novel 
