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Forum LockedScared about birth - even puttng ttc off!

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lilfatty View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote lilfatty Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 August 2008 at 8:15pm
Hmmm I actually found "comfort" of sorts reading about other peoples labour experiences....especially the onset (as I had no idea what to expect).

Mummy to Issy (3) and Elias (18 months)

I did it .. 41 kgs gone! From flab to fab in under a year LFs weight blog
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peachy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote peachy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 August 2008 at 8:25pm
I agree with Jess in the fact that your body just takes over! I found labour extremely empowering to tell the truth. I could not believe how powerful my body became to help me have my baby!

I honestly didn't think much about the birth pre-labour, it didn't really scare me that much, but what I did fear was having to have a c section. Unfortunately I DID have to have an emergency c section, I have to admit that was far more scary than being in labour for 27 odd hours. I was petrified of being cut open, BUT I survived to tell the tale
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Spirals Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 August 2008 at 9:13pm
I agree with DJ - don't read other stories or watch u-tube videos, they may just make you even more nervous.

OK - I possibly can't talk cos I haven't been through it yet, but I do know I was just as terrified as you. My 'friends' would tell me their stories and I would go deathly pale and weak, to the point of almost fainting, and feel so sick I couldn't eat for hours afterwards.

Once I was pregnant, I decided that I needed to read the birth stories thread on here, and watch some live births on u-tube. BIG mistake. If I thought I was ill and freaking out before...!!
So I now don't listen or watch horror movies *lol*
But then one friend heard I was having a hard time and contacted me to tell me she'd done the same and ignored everyone and she'd signed up for a hypnobirthing course. She said the education you get there about what your body is supposed to do, and how to deal with it every step of the way is amazing. She had an amazing birth, 17 hour labour with no pain relief (ok not sure that part would be good for me) but she loved it.

I am so convinced by her story that I am going to look into it myself. And although I still feel a bit nervous about the birth, I know I will find a way that suits me, that I will be comfortable with, and that I will be able to handle it.



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J&Ls mum View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote J&Ls mum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 August 2008 at 9:36pm
Hey D,

I was petrified of going into labour and TBH it wasn't anywhere near as bad as i thought it would be. I thought i still had 6 weeks to get used to the idea but in the end i had 24 hours (the doctors decided she need to come out NOW)
I was induced and decided after my waters were broken that i wanted the Epi and i think that was the best decision i ever made! LOL!
I had Jorja on Saturday night and when Stew was taking me home from the hospital on the tuesday afternoon i told him

"I'd do it all again tomorrow as long as i don't have to leave the next one behind"

Leaving J in the NICU was the hardest thing i have ever done! But so totally worth it cause she is the love of my life! And i wouldn't want to be without her.

You'll do it, you'll be great and it will be the BEST thing you ever did!
J - born 26th April 2008
and
L - born 3rd Sept 2010



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kakapo View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote kakapo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 August 2008 at 9:41pm

When I first talked to my midwife about labour I asked whether there was any way I could have an elective C-section as I was so terrified of the idea of giving birth. You can't have one on the Coast, have to go to Christchurch.

Luckily for me, someone in our local Active Birth group asked me to come along to their monthly coffee group when I was in my first trimester. Best thing that could have happened to me. They suggested I read "Ina May's Guide to Childbirth" which I did, and it's the only book I ended up reading during pregnancy. I believe that book and my wonderful midwife (who was an independent one, not a hospital one) are the reasons why I had a great birth experience: natural, drug free and only a little painful .

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote cuppatea Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 August 2008 at 9:49pm
I just convinced myself that in the 9 months I was pregnant someone would invent a startrek style transporter and the baby could just be beamed out

In seriousness (if that is a word) my worst fear was having a c/s, I had never had a surgery and really really don't like the idea of being cut open, or more so worried about my guts falling out afterwards. But low and behold I did end up having a c/s and it was no where near as bad as I had imagined. Although when the midwife wanted to take the tape of my wound I did feel freaky cos I thought my guts might fall out, like a piece of tape was keeping them in

I think you need to decide what type of person you are and what will work for you, i'm an information person so when I found out I would be having a c/s (he was breech) then I read anything and everything I could, everything that could go wrong, every minor detail of what they would do etc. because that is how I process and cope with things. So by the time it came to have it done I knew what was happening and why without having to ask anyone and that allowed me to stay calm (well a lot calmer, i still got the shakes when they put the spinal).
So yeah, if information works then research it but if ignorance is bliss works for you then probably best not to.

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Shezamumof3 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 August 2008 at 11:43pm

I know how you feel, I was totally freaked out at the thought of giving birth, It made me feel sick when I thought about it!

But my midwife was great at easing my mind, and also you have SOO much help these days and you know you are in good hands.

My birth was really traumatic for me(I wont tell you the details lol!) but I would do it all again in a heartbeat cos when I look at my little boy I know it was worth it

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote BuzzyBee Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05 August 2008 at 12:10am
Originally posted by CadensMum CadensMum wrote:




My birth was really traumatic for me(I wont tell you the details lol!) but I would do it all again in a heartbeat cos when I look at my little boy I know it was worth it


Yup I second this, I had nearly everything go wrong (tear, episiotomy, stitches, drugs, ventouse birth, bub went into distress etc etc) but I wouldn't change anything for the world, and I would do it all over again just to have my little man in my arms.

Labour & Birth are so insignificant in the big scheme of things
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote IVFGirl1111 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05 August 2008 at 8:54am
Thanks guys I really do appreciate everyones honesty and words.

I do think I should just take the plunge as I think Im working myself up and up and up!

Its things like being naked down there etc that really freak me out - I know it sounds dumb, but yeah I just cant cope with that sort of stuff.
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peachy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote peachy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05 August 2008 at 9:24am
Hey D, when you are in labour you really don't care who sees your "bits", all you want is your baby out

I laboured fully naked, and I had numerous m/w's, obs and an anethitist in my room while I was in labour and really did not care what they saw! To me it was like as if they are going to remember my "bits" after all the thousands of women they see every day. Honestly it was the last thing on my mind
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ginger Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05 August 2008 at 9:41am
Birth is something that scared the hell out of me as well - and still does (am considering avoiding antenatal classes for this exact reason - what I don't know won't give me a heart attack), BUT I saw my SIL briefly while she was in labour with my niece (not during the actual birthy bit though) and seeing how strong she was, and the strength she was able to harness makes me feel quite confident that I'll be fine ... even though I'm a wuss

A friend of mine said something to me that I remember well - it's only a day (more or less!). That's not much. Plus the amnesia thing is quite true for unpleasant stuff - I'm aghast at how fuzzy my memories of the nastier parts of IVF are. I thought they'd be burned into my memory, moment by moment forever. Not so.
Cuinn Lachlan 23.1.09 - 22:00
Antonia Helene 4.8.11 - 09:41
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Shezamumof3 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05 August 2008 at 10:13am
Oh and seriously when I got my epi I didnt even think about it hurting going in as Id been in labour for 40 hours lol! You just dont care when you are in labour, you sort of just have that "JUST DO AND GET THIS KID OUT" attitude Well I did anyways lol

But honestly hun, labour and all the pain is SO SO worth it, I have my little boy on my knee right now and I couldnt inagine life without him now so he was definitly worth it all

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