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miss 
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Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
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 Posted: 14 March 2008 at 9:36am |
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Lol, people do diss the secret, until they read it. Even the most cynical person has positive stuff to say about it (thoguh the don't look at fat people buit sounds funny!) after actually reading it.
haven't yet - but there is another author that I really want ot read but I can't remember the name of the book - laws of attraction or somehting.
Anyway, I am one of the luckiest people I know! And one of the happiest.
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almostthere
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Joined: 22 November 2007
Location: Auckland
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Posted: 14 March 2008 at 9:44am |
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I havnt read it, but i dont diss it. I fully understnad the power of positive thinking and attitudes.
I dont think of myself as an overly positive person, but instead more of a realist. I am a firm beleiver that you can make your own destiny in the way you behave and how you let things affect you.
As an example: I had a car accident on Tuesday. I am still sad about it. But i know it has happened for a reason and I just have to trust that I am a good person and whatever bad that has happened will be replaced at some point with something good happening.
A good friend of mine is a very negative person, but she is slowly changing her way of thinking, which is great! instead of sitting around saying 'oh, woe is me'. she now says yes, i am sad but i can make this better.
Its ok to be sad and let things affect you. But not to the point where it changes your personality..
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The_Stuarts
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Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Wellington
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Posted: 14 March 2008 at 9:53am |
 blondy wrote:
...if you are positive, you are more receptive to the good things that are out there! |
Yep, that's what I think too.
A big thing for me is that sometimes I have to do things I don't want to (like be at work away from my baby all day - c'mon lotto) but I'm here, I have little choice in the matter, so I may as well make the most of it and enjoy myself.
Every cloud has a silver lining so I look for the positives (like as a working mum I can have champagne lunches, spend more time on the internet, appreciate my daughter more when I am at home because I haven't had a chance to get sick of her toddler tantrums etc...)
I also believe in Karma, what comes around goes around, mainly becuase people who are negative or do bad things bring trouble on themselves.
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caitlynsmygirl
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Posted: 14 March 2008 at 12:36pm |
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Im mostly a positive person, we only live once so we should have a good time right?
I find the phrase "everything happens for a reason " hard to apply to everything tho, I still cant see a reason for my friend dying and not living to see a year wedding anniversary,or her daughter turn one, for example.
But i would much rather be positive than negative, tho its not always easy.
I used to be friends with a really really negative girl, who had THE worst life (according to her) in the end i slowly drifted away from her, she was just too draining
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almostthere
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Posted: 14 March 2008 at 12:46pm |
See, you may not see it now, but there will be a reason why in the greater scheme of things.. Its hard to lose someone and then to see the reason why so close to ther death... 
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nikkitheknitter
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Posted: 14 March 2008 at 1:41pm |
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Aprilfools
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Joined: 10 August 2007
Location: West Auckland
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Posted: 14 March 2008 at 4:41pm |
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If you didn't have bad or unpleasant things happen in your life you wouldn't realise that you have something to be thankful for and you'd take things for granted. Unfortunately negative people tend to take things for granted anyway. You buy them a bunch of flowers to cheer them up or say thanks and they turn around and say well why didn't you get me lillies? or something like that.
And bad things do have to happen in order to challenge you and teach you about yourself. It doesn't mean life is over. In fact if anything it should give you something to look forward to. You can not have good without bad but it is up to you what you want to concentrate on how you want to be. Look for the positives or concentrate on the negatives??
When it comes to people dying it is a very very sad fact of life. I always think that if someone dies it's a very stern reminder that you must not take your loved ones for granted; like try and remember the thousand odd good times or good things someone has done for you rather than concentrating on that one time they ticked you off.
Woe is me?? Well you reep what you sow.
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caitlynsmygirl
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Posted: 14 March 2008 at 5:46pm |
lol so did i , well Kama, she gave birth at 24 weeks to a little girl then got transferred back down to Nelson where apparently she just left and didn't leave the hospital any contact details......
I agree that when someone dies it helps US remember not to take life for granted and appreciate people more....but thats not really fair on the ones that died, my friend loved life and was so happy, married to the man she loved, brand new bubba, and it was taken from her, and perhaps its taught us , her friend's and family how to be thankful for what we've got, but why should her daughter have to learn anything-she didn't even get a chance to know her mum
sorry, I just miss her
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caliandjack
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Location: West Auckland
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Posted: 14 March 2008 at 9:38pm |
lizzle wrote:
that "secret" thing is a load of crap! apparently food will only make you fat "if you believe it". I'm all for being positive but apparently this books says if you truly believe you will win lotto - then you will. good luck with that...well the author is laughing all the way to the bank.... |
What rubbish, eating McDonald's is still going to make you fat regardless of what your 'believe'.
The only reason I truly believe that I won't win Lotto is cause I never buy a ticket!!
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3boys
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Location: Waitakere
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Posted: 14 March 2008 at 9:47pm |
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I am a really positive person and always have been, and to some extent I agree with you, but this view seems to me to be a little simplistic.
To be blunt - all the positivity in the world didn't help when my fist child was born disabled. Although we remain positive always for him, life can be hard and made even harder when you have to watch your children's pain.
Perhaps we should judge those who a negative less - some days you are just damn well pissed with the world.
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The_Stuarts
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Location: Wellington
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Posted: 14 March 2008 at 9:59pm |
caitlynsmygirl wrote:
I agree that when someone dies it helps US remember not to take life for granted and appreciate people more....but thats not really fair on the ones that died, my friend loved life and was so happy, married to the man she loved, brand new bubba, and it was taken from her, and perhaps its taught us , her friend's and family how to be thankful for what we've got, but why should her daughter have to learn anything-she didn't even get a chance to know her mum
sorry, I just miss her |
That's totally understandable. You should remember your loved ones after they go and they wil live on through you (I know cliche). I believe that once we pass we go somewhere better and death is only actually hard on those left behind.
I do also believe that everything happens for a reason. As someone said earlier it's hard to know what that reason is, especially as you mourn. My DH lost his dad when he was only 3 years old and he doesn't have many memories of him. Had his dad been alive there are plenty of circumstances that would have changed - his mother probably wouldn't have moved to Wellington so she could work 2 jobs, in which case we wouldn't have met which means the most precious treasure of our lives - Michaela - would never have been concieved.
The important thing for your friends daughter is that you don't forget her and you make sure she knows what a wonderful woman her mum was. 
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The_Stuarts
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Posted: 14 March 2008 at 10:07pm |
3boys wrote:
some days you are just damn well pissed with the world. |
Nothing wrong with being pissed off with the world somedays, I just don't understand those that are pissed off with the world everyday.
Putting a positive spin on things I believe that my brothers disability meant that growing up I didn't need to learn tolerance of those who were different from me, I recognised each person as individuals and never thought of anyone as able or disabled - there was no difference (some people have brown hair, some are blond, some can't walk well, others don't talk properly - it didn't matter).
As an adult and a parent learning more about my brothers illness (which caused his disability), what my parents went through, and the way they coped has given me enourmous respect for and understanding of them.
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caitlynsmygirl
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Posted: 14 March 2008 at 10:33pm |
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yeah, I guess at the moment its too fresh to think anything but bad about it,I guess when i realise something good has come from her death , even if its a few years away, thats when i know i'll be ok.
completely agree one hundred percent with you about your brothers disability, my sister is special needs and because of this i grew up around special kids (and now so is Caitlyn for which im grateful) and learnt the important lesson of beauty being on the inside
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lizzle
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Posted: 15 March 2008 at 8:50am |
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i did work with a guy in japan who justHATED everything. seriously, he grew some tulips and they died off, as tulips do, and he came into work ranting and raving about the "japanese wind that killed (his) tulips". everything that went wrong was japan's "fault" in some way. he got a stone in his shoe- huge catastrophy about stupid japanese stones (nothing about the stupid NZ shoe that he had in the first place), and when the train was late.....
I ended up yelling at him one day and telling him (i was preggers with jake - that al his negativity was causing me stress and "killing the baby" - aaah, i was such a professional boss.
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Positivity vs Negativity
