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Forum LockedGREAT LAUGH!!! more for the ladies...

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BaAsKa View Drop Down
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    Posted: 01 December 2007 at 9:14pm
I just got this email....some of you may have read it but anyway i cracked up!!!....


The Why's of Men

1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX?
(because they are plugged into a genius)


2. WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX?
(they don't have enough time)



3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG?
(they don't stop to ask directions)



4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS?
(because their balls fall over their butt-hole and they vapour lock)
(You're laughing, aren't you?!?!)



5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS?
(so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties)



6. WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN?
(you need a rough draft before you make a final copy)



7. HOW MANY MEN DOES IT TAKE TO PUT A TOILET SEAT DOWN?
(don't know.....it never happened)


( C'mon guys, we laugh at your blonde jokes!)


And the personal favourite:


8. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH?
(because a vibrator can't mow the lawn)


Remember, if you haven't got a smile on your face and laughter in your heart...Then you are just an old sour fart !


One for the ladies

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?"
"It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, " University of Oklahoma ."

And they say blondes are dumb...
-----------------------------------------------
A couple is lying in bed. The man says,
"I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world."
The woman replies, "I'll miss you..."

-----------------------------------------------------------

"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbours would think if I mowed the lawn like this?"
"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
-----------------------------------------------
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumour

-----------------------------------------------------------
Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death.
AMEN

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- -
Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.
-----------------------------------------------
Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.

-----------------------------------------------------------
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manual."



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kezplanet View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote kezplanet Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 December 2007 at 11:33pm
Yep have seen some of these before but they still did the trick!!
Kerryn, Mum to
Ashlyn(29/3/04), Anastasia(1/11/05) & Abigail (24/02/09)
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ShellandBella View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ShellandBella Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02 December 2007 at 8:43am
Definitely put a smile on my dial!! hehe


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Andie View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Andie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02 December 2007 at 10:01am

Never before have I thought man-jokes were funny, but today, they sooo are!  Thanks for the laugh

Andie
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Kels View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kels Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02 December 2007 at 11:15am

ROFL


Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs
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Bobbie View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bobbie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2007 at 11:26am
haha at number 3. I still tease DH that the reason it took us 6 months of TTC was that it was still the first batch trying to find their way. And given my baby's breech it's more fuel for the fire

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